The Third Prophecy
by Kaitlyn Fall
Summary: Sequel. Harry returns to bring back the girl he loves, but she is still suffering from their last encounter, and missing her memories. Will the Third Prophecy be their final hope, or their downfall? REVISED.
1. The Alternate Life

Hello, and welcome to the all new, revised, waaaay better version of The Third Prophecy! I've pretty much completely rewritten this, thanks to the unbridled enthusiasm of the wonderful **Sailor Em**. Her fangurling was just too inspirational to pass up ;p

Be aware that this is a **sequel** to The Second Prophecy, but it's not necessary to go back and read it, because my MC's lost her memories anyway.

Warning: actual decent writing, characterisation, and brand new battle scenes ahead.

DISCLAIMER: I do not own any of the Harry Potter characters - they still belong to JK Rowling, and if you didn't know that, you seriously live under a rock.

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THE THIRD PROPHECY

'_He who is chosen to defeat the Dark Lord_

_Will have the key by his side in the almighty battle_

_But only when the two advocates of the Phoenix become one_

_Can the enemy be defeated and the dust be settled.'_

**Chapter One – The Alternate Life**

My alarm buzzed – a dreadful, unnatural sound that punctured the darkness and dragged me from my nightmares. The digits of the clock glowed a ghostly green, displaying a time that no one should be awake. My hand reached out to stop the unwelcome noise.

I sighed and sunk back as silence settled in the room, but my relief was short-lived. The depression was never gone for long. A chasm opened up within me, like a hollow space where light and love should have resided. Darkness swum there instead. It crept through my insides, twisting its way around my heart and mind. I fought a sudden rush of helpless tears. I was floundering, sinking, drowning –

'Morning sunshine.'

Brightness flooded the room as my light was turned on. I squeezed my eyes shut and made a face as a cube of chocolate was forced down my throat. Not that I wasn't expecting it – she did it to me every morning.

I waited with my eyes closed as the chocolate worked its way through my system, warming my insides and bravely battling my internal darkness. When I felt it had done a good job of keeping the depression at bay, I sat up and waved away my housemate. 'I'm good, I'm good.'

She smiled and left the room, allowing me to change into my running gear. I stumbled out to the living room, hit with an onslaught of cold air. I rubbed my arms. 'Is the radiator still broken?'

'We still haven't saved enough to call the guy in to fix it,' came the reply from the kitchen.

I rolled my eyes. I worked my butt off every day to pay the bills while Pip stayed at home, and she still spoke as though we were both earning money. Sure, she owned the house and didn't ask me to pay rent, but electricity and water and broken appliances continued to cost money.

Not that I would ever complain. Pip was the one who pushed me to keep going, no matter how heavy the depression felt. I owed her my life.

She bounced back into the living room, her brown curls springing about her face. 'Here you are.' She had a mug of her usual steamy, creamy brew. I had no idea what was in it, but the stuff was like heaven. Chocolate had nothing on Pip's morning drink.

I downed it in one go and let the warmth spread through me, warding off the depression with extra gusto. It was like the weight of the world just floated off my shoulders and out of the window. I let out a sigh of relief. It wouldn't last, but it would do for now.

'Ready?' Pip asked, skipping eagerly to the door.

I pursed my lips and took a step after her. 'I guess so.'

According to my roommate, exercise was supposed to release happy hormones into the body. I'd heard the rumour, but I could assure anyone who asked that there was nothing happy about the workout she put me through. I'd done fitness training before, and this was _not_ fitness training. This was a form of torture.

When we got home, I stood under the shower for many minutes, turning the heat up until it almost scalded my skin. The steam blossomed up around me and fogged the glass door. I lathered my hair and soaped up my body as quickly as I could. Pip's brew was already starting to wear off – the depression was settling back in with a vengeance.

'You're okay,' I whispered to myself as I rinsed out the shampoo. 'You're okay. You've lived through much worse than this. Come on, please, fight it, fight it, fight it…'

I burst into tears, unable to finish the sentence. It hurt; everything hurt. The darkness within me was too hard to fight.

It didn't make any sense. I shouldn't be this upset. Sure, I'd lost my boyfriend, my best friend, and my job in one day. It had been bad. But it hadn't been _that_ bad.

And four months was a long time for me to dwell over a boy I wasn't even sure I loved. I certainly didn't miss him when I thought about him. Life in the orphanage had, at times, been much more unbearable than what I had now.

So why was I in so much pain? Why was life suddenly so difficult for me to endure?

These questions had haunted me every day since the dying days of August. And, like every day, Pip was there to stop me from losing it completely. She banged on the bathroom door, snapping me out of my tears. 'Breakfast will be ready in five!'

I caught hold of myself mid-sob. The water continued to run, washing the remnants of the soapy foam down the drain. I dragged my hands down my face and switched off the water, immediately feeling the chill of the morning air.

It took me very little time to throw on my work outfit and tie my hair back – I was ready just as Pip was serving up a stack of syrupy pancakes.

I sat down at the kitchen bench, knotting my work scarf and eyeing my plate warily. 'My teeth hurt just looking at this.'

'You need sweet things,' Pip insisted, pushing the plate closer and perching herself on a stool beside me.

'No,' I said dryly, 'I need a dental plan.'

But I ate them all anyway.

Pip waved me off cheerfully as I left for work. The shopping centre was only a few streets away, and I know she would have tried walking me there if I'd let her. It was almost as though she'd hired herself to be my personal caretaker. I'd never even met her before the day everything went to hell. All I remember is maxing out my credit card in a dangerous binge of retail therapy, then waking up in a warm bed with Pip tending to me. The depression had started the moment I'd opened my eyes, and I hadn't been able to get rid of it ever since.

As usual, the strange lady from across the road was out walking her cats. _Walking her cats._ Seriously.

She took her normal route, following me all the way to the shopping centre as the sun peeked over the horizon. I pretended not to notice her, although I could feel her eyes on my back the entire time. She could stalk me all she wanted, as long as her agenda didn't involve actually interacting with me.

I reached the centre and trudged across the carpark around the back. Aaron was out by the loading door, waiting to let me in.

'Good morning,' he said in his deep, rumbling voice.

I nodded in response, but I had no smile for him. I honestly couldn't work out why he kept me on checkout. I didn't exactly have the chipper attitude required for customer service.

But he insisted on having me out the front, interacting with people, forcing me to be social when all I wanted to do was curl up in a ball and cry.

I was well aware that he and Pip were the only reason I was still slogging through each day.

The morning started ordinarily enough. I tidied shelves for the first hour, then opened my checkout as the shutters rolled up and the first customers of the day bustled in. My regular redhead shuffled up with the paper in his hand and a broad grin on his face. He always delighted in counting the money from his coin purse before handing me the exact change. No matter how sour I was, without fail he would wish me a wonderful day. I threw his money in the register and glanced up at the clock. 8.01 am. Twelve more hours left before I could go home.

When the morning rush subsided, I was left doing nothing. My cash register was properly sorted, my conveyer belt was clean, and my plastic bags were strung up and ready for groceries. I leant against the counter, my chin in my palm, and drummed my fingers impatiently. Things got really boring when there was nobody to serve.

My eyes flickered up the clock again. 8.35 am. I watched the second hand make its eternal circuit once, twice, three times. Scanners beeped and plastic bags rustled as other counters attended to customers. There was no one near my register. Very few people liked to go through the scowling checkout chick at the end of the supermarket.

I glanced up at the clock once more. 8.39 am. I groaned. Time was moving backwards – it had to be.

'_Oh god… __Emma…'_

I jolted up, stumbling away from the counter as I searched for the owner of the voice. There was no one around – not close enough to speak to, anyway. I double-checked the area and forced my heart to calm down. My area was empty. The voice must have been my imagination.

But less than an hour later, I heard it again. Exactly the same voice, exactly the same tone.

'_Oh god… __Emma…'_

The words were intense… intimate. I ducked my head under my counter to make sure someone wasn't playing a joke on me. It had almost sounded like it was an echo in my mind – but it was too clear, and the voice was one I didn't recognise. How could my brain have come up with something like that?

Maybe I had lost it, I thought glumly. Maybe the depression had finally gotten to me, and I'd snapped.

I needed chocolate. Pip always packed me some for lunch, but I couldn't wait that long. I needed a break, and now.

I grabbed my checkout phone and called the front service desk. Simon was in charge at the moment – I had to ask him for permission before I could take my break. It seemed ludicrous that I was working under a pimply teenager after being a top employee for one of the fastest growing companies in the nation, but things had changed. My days as an executive seemed to be another lifetime ago.

As soon as I was permitted to leave, I threw my 'Sorry, Closed' sign on the conveyer belt and hurried up the steps to the employee-only section. My locker was at the far end, but I never made it. A conversation in Aaron's office stopped me in my tracks.

'…pretty sure the message was intercepted,' Aaron was saying.

'What? Are you sure?'

The second male spoke, and my heart jumped to my throat. I swear I hadn't heard the voice before, but every part of my body hummed in recognition.

'I'm not positive,' Aaron said. 'I'll keep an eye out, just in case.'

The second voice cursed. 'We tried so hard to keep that message protected. If anything happens to her –'

'She'll be fine,' Aaron said sharply. 'I'll make sure of it.'

I stumbled back, away from the door. The second male was here for someone. A girl someone.

It was utterly ridiculous that I should be jealous. I hadn't even met the guy. It was crazy – _I_ was crazy. First voices in my head, now this? I had to stop this madness, or I'd end up in a mental institution.

It took an overwhelming amount of effort on my part to walk away from Aaron's office; from the voice that made my body sing. I pried my feet from the floor one step at a time, leaving the chocolate in my locker and forcing myself to return to my checkout.

'That was quick,' Simon said as I passed the front service counter.

I grimaced. 'I guess I just love my job too much.'

The place was still fairly quiet, but I had a woman come through my checkout with a trolley full of groceries, so at least I could keep busy for a few minutes. My eyes continued to flick towards the employee-only section. I was waiting for the owner of the voice to come down the stairs. I shouldn't have been, but I was.

Unfortunately, by the time I printed the receipt, I caught sight of Aaron walking through the fresh produce section by himself. I had missed my chance.

The darkness swirled within me, as strong as ever. I regretted not eating Pip's chocolate. I waited until my customer was one before slumping my head in my arms on the counter. I forced myself to take a few long, calming breaths. It wasn't a big deal. So what if the voice was nice? So what if my heart skipped a beat because of a guy I'd never met? It was stupid.

'Stupid,' I said aloud, just to reiterate the fact. It was a negative label, and Pip would have force-fed me an entire crate of chocolate if she'd heard me use it, but I didn't care. How could I have fallen for a voice?

'Uh… is this checkout open?'

Every muscle in my body tensed up in alarm. I stayed where I was, my face hidden in my arms, unable to believe what I had just heard.

The owner of the voice was here. At my register. Talking to me.

I couldn't move. I was literally frozen. I didn't know which would be worse – lifting my head to find him there, or lifting my head to find him _not_ there. I was too frightened to see for myself. I stayed where I was, half-hoping hoping he would just walk away.

After a few moments of silence, however, he spoke again. 'Are you okay?'

The amount of concern in his tone was enough to make me look up. I found myself immediately falling into a green gaze – I could have sworn, just for a moment, that I knew every golden fleck by heart. I blinked, and the feeling faded as the rest of him came into focus. He had dark, tousled hair and a crease in his brow as he studied me.

'I'm fine,' I said, but my voice sounded unnaturally high-pitched.

In fact, every part of me felt wrong beneath his scrutiny. My hair was sloppily done, I wasn't wearing any makeup, my shoulders were too slumped and my eyes were boring compared to the brilliant green of his. I straightened my stance in a pathetic effort to change the one aspect of myself that I could.

He was still staring at me. I lowered my eyes, wishing my heart would dislodge itself from my throat so I could talk. His very presence made me feel as though I was standing on the edge of a cliff, waiting to plummet as the rocks crumbled beneath me.

At the back of my brain, I registered that he had asked me something. I scrambled to remember what it was – something about my checkout.

He'd asked if I was open.

My attention fell to his empty hands. I sucked in a big breath and forced words, real words, out of my mouth. 'Did… did you want… to buy…'

He finally looked away, as though he was caught off-guard. 'Oh, right,' he said, grabbing a chocolate bar from the impulse shelf. He didn't even look at the wrapping.

I took it from him, careful not to touch his hand, too afraid of what might happen to me if we made actual physical contact. I almost felt as though I'd melt into a puddle on the floor, and Aaron would probably dock my pay if he had to clean up liquid ex-human.

My register beeped as I scanned the bar, snapping the stranger from his reverie. 'My uncle will pay for it,' he said, his eyes on the digital display.

'Your uncle?'

'Yeah – your boss. Aaron.' He gestured towards the employee-only section. 'I just flew over to visit him.'

My grip tightened around the chocolate bar. 'You're not from here?'

'No – I'm going back home today.'

It felt like I had missed a step. I didn't even know this boy's name, and yet the thought of him leaving me – the thought that I would never see him again – was the worst thing I had ever faced. I realised with a jolt that the darkness I usually lived with had gone completely. His presence had cured my depression. He couldn't leave. He _couldn't_.

'Oi, Teesha!' Simon yelled from the front service desk. I tore my eyes away from the stranger and glanced over to him. He pointed, and I gasped when I saw for the first time that a line had formed behind the boy.

'Oh – sorry!' I said breathlessly to the closest disgruntled customer. I grabbed a handful of groceries from the conveyer belt and scanned them as fast as I could.

The boy stepped back to allow the disgruntled customer through. It was a tight squeeze, but he didn't seem overly concerned about it. 'Your name is Teesha?' he said, sounding astonished.

I couldn't look at him – I knew I'd get distracted again. I kept my eyes on my work, but I tapped my name badge in response.

'But you… Huh.'

His voice was so puzzled that I risked a quick glance in his direction. He was staring at the ground, as though he was working something out. I saw a flash of his lips quirking upwards before I returned to my customer.

'That's twenty dollars, fifty,' I said.

I was throwing the change in the register and reaching for the next load of items when he spoke again. 'So you lied.' He was impressed, for some bizarre reason.

'No,' I said, still refusing to look over at him. 'My name's definitely Teesha.'

'No – not now. I meant you lied before. You must have been trying to protect yourself. That's… incredibly quick thinking.'

'What are you talking about?' I said as I finished with my second customer and started with the third..

'You –' the boy started, but he was cut off by a familiar deep voice.

'Harry! The alarm's gone off by Thimble Drive. Someone else has arrived.'

Aaron was rushing towards us, and something about his words or expression had the boy – Harry – in a panic. 'I have to go,' he said breathlessly. He pushed past the customer I was serving and used the conveyer belt as a springboard to lean over and pressed his lips briefly against mine. 'Stay here with Kings– Aaron. I'll be back as soon as I can.'

I was still reeling from the kiss by the time Harry was halfway out of the shopping centre. I felt light; giddy. I hadn't felt so good in a long, long time. I touched my lips with trembling fingertips. A sound erupted from my mouth – a sound I never thought I'd hear again.

I was giggling.

Goddam, real-life giggling.

Even though he was gone, he had left with a promise of returning, and that was all that mattered. Light filled the void within me, chasing away the darkness. This wasn't the temporary effects of chocolate or Pip's special brew. The depression wasn't being kept at bay – it was wiped clean. Just like magic.

Aaron stayed next to me like a looming shadow as the minutes ticked past. He kept glancing around as though he was expecting someone to suddenly jump out. I tried to ask him about his nephew, but he brushed my questions aside. He seemed much more tense than the manager of a grocery store should be.

'So did your house get broken into or something?' I said when the wave of customers died down.

'Hmm?' he asked, his eyes scanning the crowds outside the supermarket.

'Your house,' I repeated. 'You said your alarm went off on Thimble Drive.'

He glanced at me. 'No,' he said in a funny voice. 'It wasn't my house alarm. It was a different kind… one that warns us when certain dangerous people enter the area.'

I blinked. 'Dangerous?'

'Very dangerous,' he said with a nod.

Panic flooded my system. I thought of all the gangs around the city. Or what if it was worse? What if Aaron was talking about terrorists or something? 'Why… why did you sent your nephew there?' I stammered.

'He can handle himself.'

I couldn't believe what I was hearing. Harry couldn't have been much older than me – why was _he_ going to investigate terrorists?

Aaron must have realised what I was thinking from the expression on my face, because he quickly continued. 'Harry's trained to deal with situations like this. It's kind of his job.'

But my blood was pounding with resolution. I had just found Harry. I wasn't going to lose him again. My mind was already coming up with a strategy – Thimble Drive was only a block from the centre. I could get there in two minutes if I ran.

I turned to make a break for it, but Aaron lunged out and grabbed my arm. His grip was like an iron shackle. 'Don't you dare,' he said through his teeth. 'You are not to leave this store, do you understand me?'

My mouth was still tingling from the kiss. I couldn't do it – I couldn't leave Harry to fend for himself. My imagination came up with different scenarios; machine guns, bombs, knives, blood…

I didn't know whether I was overreacting, but from the fear in Aaron's eyes I could tell that whatever the situation was, it was bad. My skin was prickling; I was cold all over. 'Please let me go.'

Aaron's answer was firm. 'Harry told you to stay here with me.'

I opened my mouth to argue, but a loud bang stole my voice. People screamed; Aaron and I spun as one-by-one the roller doors to the shop slammed down of their own accord.

'Th…Those aren't automatic,' I said stupidly.

Aaron released my arm. His hand dove into his inner pocket and he pulled out…

A stick.

A freaking stick.

'We're getting attacked by terrorists with machine guns, and you whip out a _stick_?' I shrieked.

Despite his obvious fear, he turned to me with an incredulous look on his face. 'Terrorists with machine guns? Where did you come up with that?'

I didn't get a chance to answer – the place was plunged into darkness as the power went out. I blinked rapidly, trying to get my eyes to adjust. Aaron put his hand on my shoulder and pushed me down until I was crouching by my register.

'Don't move,' he said, his voice barely even a whisper.

My blood was pounding to my face; it was making me hot and sweaty. I was struggling not to breathe noisily, but it seemed that every tiny movement made too much sound. I covered my mouth with my hand, breathing through my nose instead. Aaron remained a reassuring presence beside me.

I listened for any signs of life. Where were the customers? The other employers?

As though answering my question, Simon's voice rang through the supermarket. 'Why isn't the generator kicking in?'

'_Avada Kedavra.'_

There was an ominous _thump_ after a flash of green burnt my eyes. I felt Aaron tense beside me. 'No –' he whispered.

He started to get up, but I clutched his arm to stop him. 'What are you doing?'

'Don't move,' he said quietly.

'No – don't go out there!'

I couldn't explain why, but the combination of that mysterious slick voice and eerie green light had me in a panic.

'Head towards the frozen food,' Aaron said. 'I'll meet you there.'

I hesitated. 'Fine,' I murmured.

He left my side, disappearing amongst the shadows. I strained my eyes to see him, but he was pretty good at the stealthy stuff. I still had no idea what he thought he was going to accomplish with a stick.

Ignoring his instructions completely, I crawled beneath my counter and started for the front service desk. I had a terrible feeling that something had happened to Simon, although there certainly hadn't been any gunfire. I was halfway there when I heard a scuffling noise in the aisles further ahead.

'Where is she?' a voice snarled.

'She was at the last counter, I know it,' a second voice said.

It felt as though someone had dropped me in a barrel of ice water. I shivered involuntarily. Why were they were looking for _me_?

'Well why isn't she there now?' the first voice said.

'She's got to be here somewhere. _Lumos_.'

Light flooded the area, and I instinctively scrambled beneath a nearby checkout counter, knocking my head on the sharp corner in the process. A stinging sensation spread across my temple, and I blinked back tears of pain. I sat against the counter, my body trembling. Something warm trickled down my face – I pressed my hand against the wound to try to stop the blood flow.

Footsteps headed towards me. From the rise and fall of the light, it seemed as though the terrorists were sweeping their torches up and down the checkout counters. I kept low, but as soon as one of them peered over the conveyer belt, I'd be seen. I searched the shadows desperately, trying to work out whether I could sneak back the way I'd come.

'Emma,' the first voice sung. 'Emma, dear, where are you?'

I felt a moment of relief. They weren't looking for me. I was safe.

But the feeling was short-lived. They had said they were after the girl at the last counter. Harry had mentioned something about me lying about my name. And the echo in my head this morning…

'_Oh god… Emma…'_

I didn't know what was going on, but I had to assume that these men were definitely searching for me.

The light drew nearer and nearer. I was going to have to make a run for it. Adrenaline pulsed through me – I hoped it would be enough to get me out of this alive. I crouched on the balls of my feet, preparing to leap up. The footsteps were approaching my counter. I had to go. Now.

But just as I steadied myself, another flash illuminated the store; this time red. It sounded like the terrorist flew backwards, away from me. I spun and peeked over the conveyer belt. There was someone in a cloak and dark mask lying on the floor. Another cloaked figure had whipped around and appeared to be looking for the source of the light. He had a stick too, and pointed it wordlessly towards the aisle straight ahead. The shelf teetered once before toppling to the floor with a deafening crash.

My mouth fell open. Were they using a new form of laser weaponry or something?

A second streak of red light shot out from the shadows and hit the cloaked man. He flew backwards, but his partner was already getting to his feet, pointing his stick in the direction that the red light had come from. I used my chance to duck across the front of the checkout counters to the service desk. Simon's silhouette lay amongst boxes of cigarettes. Between the multicolour flashes I caught sight of his face, deathly white, his eyes wide open.

A combination of dread and terror washed through me. Little Simon couldn't be dead. He was almost finished high school. He wanted to do an Environmental Studies degree. He wanted to travel the world. He had too much to do… too much to see.

I let out a choked sob. The flashing lights stopped, and I realised in terror that my cry had been too loud. I began to slide backwards on my knees, away from Simon's body, but a pair of boots landed on the counter above me, attached to one of the cloaked men. I raised my gaze to him, unable to move, unable to breathe. The man took off his mask, revealing a pale-faced boy, perhaps only my age. He smirked and pointed his stick at me. The tip of it glowed in the darkness.

'Well well. The great Emma, working as a checkout chick? Oh well, I suppose it's better than posing as a squib slave.'

I cowered slightly. The blood from my gash was streaming down half of my face now – I wiped it out of my eye, but it kept coming. 'You… you have the wrong person,' I choked out. 'I-I'm not Emma.'

The boy rolled his eyes. 'Yeah. Nice try.'

With a trembling hand, I reached up and pointed to my nametag. 'I'm… not… Emma.'

The boy snorted. 'What, did Potter use a memory charm or something?'

'Potter?' I said breathlessly.

The boy lowered his stick, looking amazed. 'He did. He actually _did_.' He laughed manically. 'But he still has his loyal lapdogs watching over you, so obviously he was planning on bringing you back again.'

My mind was struggling to fit the pieces together. A memory charm. Had I lost my memories?

But that couldn't be right. I sorted through my past, trying to figure out if there were any days or months missing. The only thing I could think of was the day I'd lost my job. I'd woken up dazed and groggy – something must have happened in those few hours.

Something big, obviously.

My muscles were a quivering mess, but I forced my legs to work, and slowly rose to my feet. My eyes didn't leave the cloaked boy. He watched me with an amused expression on his face, but he did nothing as I took a few steps back. 'Please,' I said shakily, 'I don't know what you're talking about. Just let me go.'

The boy flicked his stick, almost lazily. 'You're not going anywhere. _Crucio_.'

I was rooted to the ground, unable to move as light from the stick shot towards me. Something slammed into my body before it hit, and I smacked against the ground, knocking the wind from my lungs and banging my head against the linoleum. I lay still, dazed for a moment, but a cruel laugh snapped me back into reality. I craned my neck and was horrified to see Harry on the ground, his body twisting in agony.

'This is perfect,' the boy on the counter said gleefully, his stick trained on Harry. 'I'd much prefer to torture you anyway, Potter.'

Those laser weapons were really high-tech.

It was a stupid, unnecessary thought, but it was the last one I had before I was getting to my feet and sprinting to the counter, preparing to launch into the boy.

I hadn't even made two steps, however, before a deep voice called out. _'Stupefy!'_

The boy on the counter was literally lifted off his feet. He flew threw the air and slammed into the roller doors, making a dent in the metal. He fell to the floor and lay still, eyes closed. When I was sure he wasn't going to attack again, I stumbled to Harry, who was on his back, breathing heavily.

Aaron reached him before I did. 'Harry –'

'Is she okay?' Harry said between gasps. 'Did he hurt her?'

Aaron glanced over to me and winced. 'She got a bit banged up, but she'll be fine.'

I automatically wiped at the blood on my face, but my heart was only focussed on the fact that Harry's first question had been about me. _Me_.

Harry raised his head. A pained expression crossed his face when he caught sight of me. He moaned and lay back down. 'She wasn't supposed to get hurt again…'

He rolled over and began lifting himself to his feet. I rushed over in alarm. 'Whoa whoa, what are you doing?' I knelt beside him and gently pushed him back down. 'Just take it easy.'

Two loud _cracks_ almost stopped my heart, and Aaron swore loudly. 'Malfoy's gone.' He stood up, surveying the store with scowl on his face. 'Dammit, I thought he was out cold.'

I glanced over to where the boy had landed. The place was empty. I wondered briefly how he had run out without any of us seeing him, but it hardly mattered. As long as he and his friend were gone.

I ran my fingers through Harry's dark hair. It felt like the most natural action in the world. 'Are you okay?' I whispered.

His brow creased, and he reached up to press the heel of his palm against my wound. 'We need to get that fixed up,' he said, ignoring my question.

'Place is secure,' a familiar voice called from the back. 'We've got a few causalities, but they're in the back by the loading door. The muggle ambulance should be able to get through our giant hole in the wall.'

Aaron turned to the newest arrival. 'Is Weasley here?'

'Just helping the victims,' came the reply. 'Figg's going to stay and watch if anyone else comes through. Why is it so dark in here?'

The lights flickered back on, and after a few moments to adjust to the glare, I found myself staring at my roommate. She grinned over the counter at me, but her smile was quick to vanish. 'You're hurt.'

'It's not as bad as it looks,' I said. 'What are you doing here?'

Pip's eyes fell to Harry. 'Taking you home, by the looks of it.'

I clung to Harry's hand. 'No. I'm not leaving him.'

'Well he's coming with us, silly. It's his home too.'

I was mightily confused, but Harry sat up before I could ask any questions. 'I'm good,' he said. 'Let's go.'

'Simon,' I said in a sudden moment of recollection. My heart lurched at the name.

Aaron closed his eyes. 'Ah,' he murmured. He walked around to the pile of cigarette boxes, which was just out of my view. He bent down, and I cried out in alarm.

'What are you doing?'

'I need to leave him here for your police,' Aaron said, his deep voice now a gentle tone. 'But I'm just going to close his eyes.'

Tears mixed with the blood on my face, and a sob shuddered across my chest. I didn't know Simon very well, but it felt as though the world was suddenly missing a piece.

Harry slipped his hand to the back of my neck and pulled me forward to kiss my forehead. I revelled in the sensation. He pressed his lips to my ear. 'I'm going to take you home now, okay? Your real home.'

'Are you sure?' Pip said as we got to our feet. She looked worried.

'Yes,' Harry said, still clutching my hand. 'Dumbledore wants her back.'

'She's not exactly recovered –'

'I am,' I said, and I smiled shyly at Harry. 'I'm better now… now that you're here.'

Harry faltered. It was the last reaction I'd expected. He even took his hand away from mine. I felt empty without his touch.

'Let's just get out of here,' he muttered, and stalked towards the employee-only section without a backwards glance.

A thrill of fear rushed down my spine. What had I done wrong?

Aaron hurried over to me and led me after Harry. My feet moved automatically – I wasn't paying any attention to where I was going. 'Did I say something bad?' I said, consumed by rising panic.

'No,' Aaron said quickly.

Pip kept her stride even with us. 'He's just keen to get home,' she assured me, but I caught the look that she exchanged with Aaron.

They ushered me up the stairs and into Aaron's office. Harry kept his eyes on a painting hanging from the wall – he didn't look at any of us.

A redhead suddenly burst into the room. My regular customer – the one who always bought the newspaper and enjoyed counting the change from his coin purse. I shouldn't have been surprised, after everything that had happened, but it was still completely bizarre seeing him there.

'Everyone ready then?' he said, looking harried. 'We're going to have to break a few rules, Kingsley.'

'That's fine,' Aaron said. 'We're not going to stick around waiting for more Death Eaters to attack.' He pulled his stick back out from his inner pocket and rapped it against his chair. _'Portus.'_ The chair glowed blue for a moment and quivered slightly before turning to normal.

I'd fallen down a rabbit hole.

Aaron touched the chair and stood back. Pip, the redhead, and Harry all copied. Harry didn't look at me, but Aaron gestured for me to follow their lead. Feeling downright ridiculous, I grabbed onto one of the arms of the chair.

Aaron grimaced. 'Everybody hang on.'

And the world turned upside down.


	2. Home Again

**Chapter Two – Home Again**

The whole world was literally spinning. Colours swirled around me – or was I swirling within them? Either way, I really wanted to vomit. Just when I thought I couldn't take anymore, just when I was ready to gnaw my hand off stupid Aaron's office chair to break free, the whirling stopped and I landed with a thud on a soft red rug.

I clutched my head as soon as my hand was released. I felt insanely dizzy, like I had once after a ride on the Gee-Whiz. And if that was the reference I was using, I was definitely going to puke.

'Whew, I love those things!' Pip said from beside me.

I flailed my arm out to whack her, but my orientation was way off, and I hit air. Pip laughed, grabbing my hand and hauling me to my feet. I clutched my mouth as my stomach lurched, but thankfully I didn't lose my pancakes from that morning.

The others looked less frazzled – in fact, all of them were standing and waiting for me. I took a moment to survey the room. It was an odd sort of office, with a desk and a chair being the only remnants of normality. Unfamiliar instruments whirred and hissed and clinked all around me, and a fireplace crackled in the corner. Movement caught my eye – I realised in alarm that the multitude of paintings were…

Alive.

I averted my gaze and shook my head. No, that was crazy. They must have been state-of-the-art televisions or something.

I glanced at Harry. His attention was off to one side, refusing to acknowledge my presence. The indifference stung me more deeply than I could handle.

'Where are we?' I said, hoping the others would take my breathlessness to be an after-effect of the carnival ride.

'We'll explain everything in a moment,' Aaron said.

'We'll need to get her to the hospital ward first,' Harry said, still not looking at me.

I bit my lip. 'And you,' I said softly.

He finally met my gaze, appearing too surprised to ignore me. 'Me?'

'Don't think I've forgotten what happened,' I said. 'That boy – he tortured you.'

Harry turned away again. 'It was nothing.'

I was mortified to feel tears welling up. After everything that had happened, this was the last straw. 'I saw it!' I said in frustration. 'Don't you dare say it was nothing! You were in _agony_.'

'It doesn't matter.'

I scrubbed at my cheeks. 'How can you say that? You took that blow for me.' My voice cracked. I didn't understand what was going on. How could he throw himself in front of danger to save me, then act like it meant nothing?

The door behind me opened. I didn't turn at first, but the visitor addressed me, and I had no choice but to tear my eyes from Harry.

'Ah, you're here. Very early, I've noticed. Emma, how are you?' The man was old, with a long silver beard and little glasses on his nose. He seemed to be wearing a dressing gown and nightcap. He pressed his lips together when he saw my gash. 'That will need to be looked at immediately. Come along.'

'She doesn't know anything yet, Albus,' Aaron said as the group of us followed the old man out of the office. 'We didn't have time to explain – we were attacked by Death Eaters. There was at least one muggle fatality.'

'Oh dear,' the old man, Albus, said. He sounded very sad – as sad as me, and he didn't even know Simon.

The moment I stepped out of the room, I was hit by a blast of icy air. The stone walls and long staircase seemed to reminiscent of a castle, but the staircase wound down like a strange escalator, so I figured it must be some sort of amusement park. That would certainly explain the Tilt-A-Whirl ride from Aaron's chair.

I hugged myself as we left the staircase and walked down a long stretch of hallways. It was freezing, and the windows outside showed a white landscape. I shivered. It certainly wasn't snowing where I'd come from.

We were somewhere else.

'Here,' Harry said from behind, making me jump. I didn't know what to say as he draped his jacket over my shoulders. The material was warm, and smelled like him. I felt a blush rise to my cheeks, but he passed me without another word and headed to the front of the group to talk to Albus. I clung to the jacket the same way I clung to the hope that there was a perfectly good reason for why he was acting so strange towards me.

I edged to my right, keeping in pace with Pip. 'Care to fill me in?'

She flashed me a grin. 'It's a really long story.'

'I hope so – I doubt you'd be able to sum all this up in a few sentences.'

'Nope. It'd take about seven books to explain.' I opened my mouth to ask another question, but she suddenly stopped short, a thrilled expression crossing her face. 'Remus!'

There was a man standing further down the passage – I hadn't noticed him until now. I watched in amazement as Pip pushed past the rest of the group and rushed to the man, jumping right into his arms. We all politely looked away as the two kissed, then Pip ducked back, dragging me forward. 'Remus, this has been my roommate for the past few months!'

Remus smiled. He had an air of kindness to him that I immediately loved. 'Yes,' he said, moving forward and examining the wound on my temple. 'She's also been my student for the past few months.'

I blinked. 'Beg your pardon?'

Remus took out a stick from his coat (did everyone carry around those things?), and waved it in front of my face. '_Tergeo._' I cringed as it stung slightly. 'Sorry,' he said. 'I was just cleaning the area.'

'We're taking her down to Poppy now,' Albus said. 'Would you like to join us?'

'Without a doubt,' Remus said, winking at me and continuing down the hallway with the group. 'I want to hear what life was like on the other side.'

'Hmm, you shouldn't ask,' Pip said. 'She was a bit of a wreck. It was hard enough getting her out of bed every morning.'

Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Harry blanch. I wanted to say I was okay now, that his mere presence had taken away the pain, but the last time I'd said that, he'd started acting strange, so I opted to keep my mouth shut.

'I'm sure you did a great job,' Remus said fondly to Pip. He turned to me. 'Though I'll bet having Tonks as a roommate was a handful.'

I glanced from him to Pip quizzically. 'Tonks?'

Pip laughed. 'She doesn't know who I really am yet.'

'Well, surely she knows enough about the books –'

'No, Remus,' Albus said. 'I've wiped the text from her mind as well. She has no recollection of Harry Potter – the muggle version _or_ the real one.'

I spun to the old man. 'You?' I said in disbelief. 'You're the reason I can't remember all this?'

'You know your memories have been wiped?' Aaron said in surprise.

'That boy in the cloak told me,' I said. 'But he thought Harry had done it.'

'Did he say anything else?' Harry asked quietly. I glanced back at him. He kept his eyes on the ground. 'About what happened before, I mean.'

'No,' I said. 'He didn't really get a chance.'

_Because you saved me,_ I wanted to add, but he seemed to be keen to brush his heroic act aside.

I went with a different topic instead, turning to Remus for answers. 'So how can I have been Pip's – Tonks's – roommate, and your student simultaneously?'

'You were sent back in time,' Remus said simply.

My brain did not allow me to register that sentence. 'Oh,' I said. It was probably some joke, but I didn't find it very funny.

Remus continued. 'Something… unpleasant… happened to you, and we had no choice but to wipe your memories to save your life.'

'Unpleasant?' I said, my voice going up a pitch. I think I preferred it when no one was giving me answers.

'Yes. We have to be careful – let your memories return in fragments, instead of all at once, otherwise we'll overload you, and you'll end up in the same state you were last time.'

A shiver ran down my spine. I didn't know what had happened, but it sounded pretty frightening, for these people to take such drastic measures.

'Who are you all, exactly?' I said. 'I mean, I figure you're part of the government or something, but you all seem to have different kinds of jobs –'

Tonks, Aaron, and my redhead customer all laughed. 'You're not even close,' Tonks said.

'Really? So you're a private institution?'

Tonks stopped me in the middle of the hallway, and we stood face to face.

'Er… Tonks,' Remus said hesitantly. 'I don't know if that's such a good idea –'

'She'll be fine,' Tonks said.

Before my eyes, her features blurred, twisted, and changed shape. Her nose shrunk, her hair crept back up into her head until it was short and pink, her cheekbones lifted, and the shape of her eyes altered. It was like she was a plasticine doll, and someone had morphed her from one identity to another.

I stared at her for several seconds, trying to take in what I had just seen. 'Wow,' I said after a moment. 'Technology has gotten a lot further than I could have even guessed.'

'Technology?' Tonks giggled. 'That's not technology, love, it's magic.'

'Magic?' I turned, watching as the paintings on the walls chatted amongst themselves, or walked from frame to frame, or listened to our conversation with interest. 'This… this is just a trick though, right? An illusion?'

'Nope,' Tonks said. 'It's real life magic.'

'Real… life… magic…' I whispered, still pivoting on the spot.

'That's enough,' Remus murmured to Tonks. 'I think it's too much for her.'

Around and around I turned, until the paintings started to blur, and the world was spinning almost as fast as when I was holding on to Aaron's office chair.

And then I realised I wasn't turning at all, that it was just my head, and my body went cold all over, and everything went black.

xxx

'That was really unnecessary.'

'I thought she'd find it cool.'

'She dealt with it much better the first time around.'

'Really? No fainting fits then?'

'Give her a break, Kingsley said she went through a lot today. Not to mention – oh, she's waking up.'

I stirred and opened my eyes to find Remus and Tonks smiling down at me. Tonks tickled my nose. 'Wotcher.'

I batted her away with a groan. 'I'm surprised you're not trying to shove chocolate down my throat.'

Tonks poked my abdomen. 'I think you've had enough chocolate to last a lifetime.'

'I've been trying to tell her that for months,' I said to Remus.

He grinned. 'Feeling better?'

I sat up in the bed, glancing around. The place was a large room with a row of beds, like a hospital wing. Candles burned all around me, including a few hanging in midair. Large floor-to-ceiling windows lined the wall opposite me, showing hills of snow.

'I don't know,' I said slowly. 'Was everything that happened this morning real?'

Remus placed a hand on my leg. 'I'm afraid so. Once you start to get your memories back, you'll fare much better. You were a very capable young woman last time we met.'

I hugged the white cotton blanket draped over my body. 'Now I'm not,' I murmured. 'Now I'm just a girl who has fainting fits.'

Remus shot a glare at Tonks. She quickly turned to me. 'I didn't mean –'

'Yes you did,' I said, lying back down in the bed. 'I don't blame you.'

She flicked my forehead. 'Don't go giving me attitude like that. I spent four months straight spewing pep talk after pep talk – are you telling me that you didn't pick _anything_ up from them?'

I stared at the high ceiling, wishing each breath wasn't so very difficult to take.

'Why does Harry hate me?' I whispered at last.

'Hate you?' Tonks said in surprise.

'No, no, he doesn't hate you,' Remus said. 'He definitely doesn't hate you. He's just… going through something. Like you are.'

I reached up and touched the place where my gash had been. I could feel no blood on my face, and no cut on my temple.

'You're all fixed up,' Tonks said with a smile.

'Let me guess,' I said wryly. 'Magic?'

'Yes, actually. Glad you're catching on.'

I sat up again. 'I'm out of here.'

Remus caught my shoulders to stop me. '_This_ is more like how she was the first time.'

I felt anger rise within me. 'I'm not… This isn't… You're not…' My spluttering was getting me nowhere. I was just too angry and confused to figure out which sentence to say first.

Remus tried to push me back down. 'Emma, please –'

I lost my temper then. 'My name is _not_ Emma!'

'Emma?'

Remus, Tonks, and I all spun in surprise. A girl and a boy stood awkwardly in the hospital ward doorway. The girl had wild brown curls, while the boy was tall and had red hair like my customer who'd come with us to the castle.

The girl stepped forward. 'Emma, are you okay?'

I stared at her. 'Who are you?' I turned to Tonks. 'Who is she?'

'She doesn't remember us,' the boy said glumly.

'Of course she doesn't,' the girl snapped back. 'She's had her memories taken away from her, hasn't she?'

'Well I thought she'd remember _us_,' the boy said indignantly.

'What? Why?'

'Well, because I'm so handsome, for starters.'

I couldn't help myself. I choked back a snort. And then the snort became a giggle, and the giggle became a laugh. I clung to Remus's arms, tears rolling down my face. Whether it was from amusement or whether it was because I'd lost it, I wasn't sure. Either way, the girl looked pleased, and the boy looked affronted. 'It's not _that_ funny.'

'I'm sorry,' I said between gasps. 'I think I'm a little hysterical.'

The girl bounded over to me and sat on my bed beside Tonks. 'I'm Hermione,' she said. 'And over there's Ron. We all used to be friends before… before you went away.'

'Right, before I went back in time,' I said, and I laughed harder. 'Before I had my memories wiped. From people who play with sticks.'

The laughs hurt. I wanted to stop, but my body wouldn't let me. I needed someone to slap me across the face, or throw cold water on me, but they all just watched with concerned expressions. I was probably going to die of suffocation if I didn't snap out of it.

Turned out I didn't need a slap across the face.

Harry walked in, and all hysteria vanished. My smile died, my tears stopped, and the flush faded from my cheeks. It may as well have been a douse of cold water, because suddenly I was shivering again.

'Sorry to interrupt,' he said, his eyes everywhere but me. 'I just wanted to get my jacket back. If you've finished with it, I mean.'

I still had it around my shoulders. I really didn't want to part with it – I didn't want to be without that tiny piece of him.

But I shrugged out of it and handed it to Remus.

'Thanks,' Harry said, taking it from him.

There was a silence. When he didn't leave, I couldn't help frowning. 'Was that all?'

'No,' he said at last. 'Dumbledore wants us to head to the meeting room when Emma's ready.'

'I'm ready,' I said, wriggling past Remus and getting out of bed.

'Are you sure?' Harry said, his eyes flicking to my face. 'You didn't seem very well before –'

'I'm fine now,' I said irritably.

A quiet groan came from the spot Ron was standing. 'We don't have to start again with these two, do we?'

Harry flinched, though I didn't know why, then spun and walked out. Ron grimaced. 'Oops. Sorry mate – Harry, wait up!'

He ran out after Harry. I glanced questioningly at Hermione, but she looked away and didn't explain.

It was frustrating, but I thought about where I _could_ be – back home, living the same dreary life day after day, struggling against a depression that would simply not go away – and I decided that I'd rather be here, no matter how hard it got.

Hermione, Tonks, and Remus led me back through the chilly halls and up many flights of stairs. I was lucky to have endured Tonks's regular torture workouts, because the stairs were hardly even enough to break me out in a sweat. I refused to look at the paintings on the walls, and pretended not to notice as the staircases moved of their own accord.

We finally stopped outside a large door in the middle of a hallway, and filed inside to find a long table already filled with people chatting and laughing. There were plates of snack food, although most of the treats were already gone. I caught sight of Harry at the far end, next to Albus. Tonks and Remus squeezed in beside a very large man with a bushy beard. He seemed pleased to see Tonks, and started talking to her animatedly. Hermione slipped beside Ron, over by Harry.

I didn't want to sit with Harry. I didn't want to endure any more of his cold attitude.

To my relief, I caught sight of a spare seat next to Aaron on the other side of the table, and ducked next to him.

'How are you?' he said.

I shrugged. 'The outside of my head's all right. Don't know about the inside.'

He gave a booming laugh that seemed to roll across the table. 'You'll get used to it. Oh – by the way, my real name is Kingsley Shacklebolt.'

I stared at him. 'Excuse me?'

He winked. 'You don't think I used my real name while I was undercover, do you?'

'Undercover?'

'Right. Watching over you.'

'I was too,' said my redhead customer from a few people down. He leaned over the table and waved to me. 'Arthur Weasley. Hello.'

'So… you're not a crazy person?' I said.

'Oh, no. Just a wizard.'

I nodded, looking away. 'Right,' I muttered. 'Just a wizard.'

The chatter died down quite suddenly, and all heads turned to Albus. It was hard concentrating on the old man while Harry was sitting next to him, so I kept my eyes on the wall just above Albus's nightcap. Or… was it some kind of wizard hat?

'Good morning,' Albus said, before my mind could ponder the possibilities.

I discretely checked my watch under the table. It was certainly not morning, but I supposed that was the least of my troubles at the present time.

'Thank you very much for joining us earlier,' Albus continued. 'I appreciate that it took quite an effort for most of you to get away, especially during the holiday time. Unfortunately, the retrieval of Emma turned out to be quite difficult. My message was intercepted, and Death Eaters attacked, killing a muggle in the process.'

A different kind of silence fell across the table. There was no chewing, no fidgeting. Just stillness.

'And Emma, of course, was put in immediate danger,' Albus said.

I felt my face scorch beneath the stares of everyone in the room. I shrunk beside Aaron – Kingsley.

'Were you hurt?' a strict-looking woman asked.

Tonks answered for me. 'She's already been to the hospital ward.'

'Are her memories back yet?' said a man with scruffy dark hair and twinkling eyes.

I shook my head, too nervous to speak in front of all these people. Four months ago, I did presentations for work in front of rooms ten times this size. It was horrible how incapable I had become.

'Ah well, she'll get there,' said Ron, reaching for a mini quiche.

'Arabella remains on watch,' Albus said. 'She will contact us if there are any more disturbances, but I believe the Death Eaters are done with the place.'

'Why did you bring Emma back so soon, anyway?' Tonks said, glancing over to me in concern. 'She was hardly ready to return.'

'It was necessary,' Albus said. 'There is, as of the small hours of this morning, a third prophecy.'

'You're kidding,' said Ron in astonishment. '_Another_ one?'

'As circumstances change, so does the path one must take to victory,' Albus said, suddenly looking rather grim. 'For Emma's sake, I shall briefly explain the first two prophecies. The first was made before Harry's birth, about a boy who will fight to the death with the dark wizard known as Voldermort. Harry was marked as the contender; there is no debate about that. He is destined to fight Voldermort before his birthday this year.

'Several months ago, a new prophecy was made about a muggle who will be the key to victory. We discovered that was you. Now our dear Seer has blessed us with another one, and I beg you not to take the clearest meaning to heart. Prophecies have many red herrings and interpretations, and never mean exactly what they say.'

A tense silence filled the room, and he hesitated to continue.

'Go on,' Harry said with a sigh. His voice still made my body shiver. 'You might as well get it over with.'

Albus inclined his head. 'Very well.' He closed his eyes as though he was about to fall asleep. After several silent moments, he spoke in a grave voice.

'_He who is chosen to defeat the Dark Lord_

_Will have the key by his side in the almighty battle_

_But only when the two advocates of the Phoenix become one_

_Can the enemy be defeated and the dust be settled.'_

No one said anything for a long time. My heart beat against my ribcage as I struggled to piece the information together. Harry was the chosen one. I was the key. We were supposed to fight some dark wizard together.

One of us was going to die.

'No.'

Harry's voice broke the silence. He stood and slammed his hands down on the table. 'NO!'

'Harry, it's open to interpretation –' Remus said gently, but Harry shook his head.

'How can you interpret that any differently? _How_?' He dragged his hands down his face. 'Why does this keep happening to me?' His voice cracked as he said it.

He turned and walked around the table, straight out of the room. The slam of the door rang out long after he'd gone.

There was a tense moment before Remus spoke up. 'Albus, he's right. How else can you take that?'

'I can assure you,' said Albus, 'that there will be a hidden meaning in there somewhere. And if anyone can figure it out, it's Emma.'

My head snapped up in shock. 'What? Me? I don't know anything about anything!'

'But you will,' Albus said. 'I promise.'

I hung my head in my hands and stared at the table. Was this really happening? Was I honestly facing a 50-50 chance of death? And if not, was I the only person who could figure it all out?

I almost demanded right then to be taken home, but the thought of returning to that life, to that unbearable existence, was enough to stop me.

'So why is Harry all bent out of shape?' I said miserably. 'He already knew he had to fight this wizard guy to the death. What difference does this new prophecy make?'

'Well don't you see?' Hermione said, sounding surprised. 'It's not _himself_ he's worried about, it's –'

'Hermione,' Remus cut in.

I glanced up in time to catch him shaking his head at her. She pressed her fingers to her lips. 'Sorry.'

'What?' I said.

'Not now,' Albus said gently. 'It's too soon.'

'I'd love to get _some_ kind of information from someone,' I said in frustration.

'It's kinda weird that Emma doesn't know absolutely everything,' Ron said with a chuckle.

'What's that supposed to mean?' I demanded.

'Well,' said Hermione, glancing at Remus before continuing. 'I suppose it's all right to tell you that much. You're a psychic.'

'Excuse me? I am not!'

'Well, it only works in the wizarding world, apparently. You see visions of future events. No one's ever done that before.'

I tried to take this in. 'But there are clairvoyants, and –'

'The closest thing we had to a psychic before were Seers, and they only make prophecies or see symbols of the future,' said Remus.

'So if I'm so great, then how come I don't know _anything_?' I said crossly.

Everyone looked uncomfortable. 'Well…' Remus murmured, 'we discovered earlier on that a great trauma blocks your visions. Obviously the terrible thing that happened to you when you were last here is still suppressing your abilities.'

'Well how am I supposed to get over it if no one tells me what it was?' I said.

'Can you just trust me when I tell you that you're better off waiting?' Remus said. 'Believe me, you don't want to end up where you were last time.'


	3. Tour

**Chapter Three – Tour**

Hermione wanted to show me around the castle after the meeting, but I was too cold, and I didn't want to see anything else. My brain was overloaded with information. I couldn't take any more.

So she led me up to a grand common room and we sat in front of the fire to warm ourselves. I kept close, inching right by the mantle to get as much heat as I could. Hermione settled in a comfy armchair nearby.

I yawned, watching the red flames flicker and crackle. It was only supposed to be the afternoon, but my watch told me it was getting late.

'You come from another part of the world,' Hermione said when she caught me checking the time. 'You must be tired.'

I nodded, but I didn't move from my spot. 'What was I like?' I said. I played with the fringe of the hearthrug. 'When I was here last time, I mean.'

Hermione hesitated. 'There were ups and downs,' she said. 'But you always seemed to know what was going on. We were all amazed at how perceptive you were.'

I pressed my lips together in a thin line. 'It must've been nice.'

'You'll get your memories back,' Hermione assured me. 'And I hope it happens soon – I've missed talking to you about girl stuff. The boys just don't get it.'

I should have smiled, but my heart lurched at the thought of Harry. I didn't want to think about him. I changed the subject. 'How long has it been since I've left here?'

'A couple of weeks,' Hermione said. 'The time travel thing –'

I groaned, cutting her off. 'Don't go there,' I said. 'It confuses me too much. All I need to know is that I was here for a little while.' I pulled my legs to my body and hugged my knees. 'That boy who attacked me –'

'Malfoy.'

'Right.' I knew his name now. The meeting had gone into great detail about what had happened with him, but every time his past actions were mentioned, everyone would clam up and avoid looking at me.

'So Malfoy,' I continued. 'He did something to Harry with his… with his wand.' I cringed at the word, but Hermione didn't laugh. 'It was a spell or something. Harry was in a lot of pain.' Hermione didn't say anything. I studied her. 'What did he do?'

'It could have been a lot of things,' Hermione said shortly.

I wasn't going to give up. 'Like…' I prompted.

Hermione looked away. 'Like the Torture Curse.' Her voice came out as a whisper.

I grimaced. 'That sounds bad.'

'It is.'

'He… he took that for me. Harry. He pushed me out of the way.'

Hermione had a funny expression on her face as she picked at a thread from the armchair. 'Harry… believes you've been through enough.' She said every word very carefully. 'He knew what he was getting himself into. And – and you shouldn't worry yourself over it. He's fine now, isn't it?'

I didn't reply. Was he fine? He was certainly acting very different towards me now.

I wanted to know… I wanted to know what had happened between us last time I was here. I wanted to understand exactly what our relationship was. If my present feelings were anything to go by, I'd certainly fallen in love with him.

But did he love me back?

Maybe – and it killed me to think it – maybe my feelings had been unrequited. Maybe Harry was keeping his distance now because he didn't want the same thing to happen again. I was too frightened to ask Hermione for the truth; too paranoid that she would give me a sympathetic smile and explain that I had followed him around like a lovesick fool. My face burnt in humiliation. It would certainly explain why Harry starting acting weird after I said that I felt better in his presence.

I buried my head in my knees, wishing I'd never opened my stupid mouth.

'Are you okay?' Hermione said.

I nodded. 'Just tired.' My voice was muffled enough to mask the strain.

I heard her get up. 'Well come on. I'll take you up to our dorm room. You have a trunk of clothes – everything's been cleaned for you since last time.'

I followed her up another flight of stairs, into a circular room with five beds. It finally occurred to me that the place was incredibly empty.

'Where is everyone?'

'It's term break at the moment,' Hermione said. 'But the students will be returning on Sunday.'

'And… what will I do?'

'I'm not sure,' Hermione said. 'Last time, you just took classes with us, but I don't know if you can do that anymore.' She hesitated. 'There's probably something else you should know.'

I sighed. 'Of course there is. Like my imminent death isn't enough.' When she didn't say anything else, I gestured for her to continue. 'Hit me.'

Hermione opened a trunk at the end of one of the beds and pulled out a pair of pyjamas. 'The thing is, people were getting suspicious because you were hanging around Harry all the time. We were forced to end up having you pose as a squib slave.'

The words sounded familiar to me. I was pretty sure Malfoy had mentioned the same thing at the supermarket. I shrugged at Hermione's expression. 'That doesn't mean anything to me.'

'Basically, you were pretending to be Harry's… um… servant. Who was paid to do whatever he asked. If you catch my drift.'

'Okay, fine,' I said, taking the pyjamas off her. 'Whatever. I'm not actually doing that, so why would I care?'

'People were mean to you,' Hermione said quietly.

I rolled my eyes. 'After what I've been through the past four months, I think I can handle a little bit of hostility.'

Hermione seemed reluctant, but she nodded. 'Okay. I hope you're right.' She backed towards the door. 'Have a good sleep, then. I'll see you in the morning.'

She left, and I changed out of my work outfit. It was with some relief that I untied my employee scarf for the last time.

I lay in the warm bed, thinking it would take ages before I'd be able to fall asleep, but the next time I opened my eyes the room was pitch black. I blinked, trying to regain my bearings. Light, even breathing on the other side of the room told me that Hermione was asleep. I fumbled about for my watch and pressed a button to illuminate the face. It was supposed to be midday, but the sun hadn't even come up yet. The time difference must have been pretty big.

I climbed out of bed and felt around for my trunk. I pulled on the first clothes I could find and walked carefully across the room to the stairs.

A dim glow at the bottom of the staircase told me that the common room fire was still going. I headed there gratefully, anticipating the warmth of the flames. When I reached the foot of the steps, however, I stopped.

There was someone there, standing by the mantle, staring into the fireplace. I sucked in a breath, half-thrilled, half-terrified.

'H-Harry?'

He turned in surprise. 'Emma? What are you doing up?'

I rubbed my arms and started hesitantly towards him. 'Just getting used to the time difference.' I noticed he was wearing the same clothes as the previous day. 'Can't sleep?'

He turned back to the fire. 'No.'

I screwed up my courage and stood beside him, staring down at the last charred log. I wanted to lighten the mood – I wanted him to talk to me. 'So… how 'bout that prophecy, huh?' I said, trying to sound nonchalant. 'A 50 percent chance of death. I'm not liking my odds, to be honest.'

I felt him tense beside me. 'I won't let it come true,' he said lowly.

'So should we run away together?' I was only half-joking.

'Maybe,' he said, and it sounded like he was seriously considering it.

I shrugged. 'Well, your friend Albus seems to think there might be another meaning behind it. Those things are pretty cryptic, I hear.'

'Mmm.' He wasn't convinced.

A silence fell over us. We were standing so close to each other. I glanced down, longing to take his hand. The two of us were connected; our fates entwined, our lives on a thread. We were in this mess together – surely he'd let me get away with one little touch?

I brushed my hand against his skin. When he didn't pull away, I entwined my pinky around his. He slid his hand sideways, lacing all his fingers within mine. My heart soared; my insides hummed. We turned to each other at the same time, and he lifted my hand to press his lips against each of my knuckles.

I remembered, finally, that he had kissed me at the checkout, and again on my forehead, after I'd been hurt.

How stupid and insecure had I been, to forget such a pivotal thing? I'd been so worked up over his cold attitude that I had brushed aside the fact that he had been quite obvious about his feelings beforehand.

He kissed down the side of my hand, along the curve of my thumb, and against the inside of my wrist. My breaths turned sharp. Every part of my body ached with heat. I wanted him, all of him. I wanted his arms around me. I wanted his mouth on mine. I wanted his body pressed up against me.

He dropped my hand, his fingers lifting to the sides of my face, pulling me forward for the kiss that I burned for –

The door suddenly opened, and he fell back, away from me. I was hit with a rush of cold air and an empty sensation.

The bitter disappointment didn't last long. I caught sight of the creature that had entered the room, and all I could feel was terror.

'Harry!' I shrieked, launching myself behind him and clutching his jacket.

'It's ok,' Harry said gently. 'It's just –'

'Master Harry!' the thing said in delight when he saw us. It skipped over to us joyously, but stopped when it saw me. 'Is Dobby interrupting something?' It gasped and covered its eyes with its hands. 'Should Dobby not be looking?' Despite its apparent awkwardness, it still peeked through its long fingers.

'No Dobby,' Harry said, 'it's all right. You haven't met Emma, have you? Dobby, this is Emma, Emma this is the house-elf, Dobby.'

The thing leapt up and grabbed my hand, shaking it happily. 'It's so nice to meet a friend of Harry's! Dobby has heard strange things about Harry's squib slave –'

'She's not a squib slave,' Harry said sharply.

'Oh?' Dobby asked, its long, bat-like ears perking up as it stared at me. 'Dobby heard many rumours –'

'They're not true,' Harry said.

Dobby glanced at me, and its eyebrows flew up. 'Dobby recognizes that shirt!' it said, looking proud. 'Dobby had a tough time mending all the buttons and rips, and getting the blood out, but now it's like brand new –'

Harry left my side within an instant. I lost my grip on his jacket as he stalked across the common room and went up a different set of stairs to the one I had descended. I stared after him, struggling to understand what had happened.

He'd left.

He'd left me alone with the creature. He hadn't said goodbye, or explained where he was going. He'd just left.

I hugged myself, feeling lost without him. What had happened? What had I done wrong this time?

'Did Dobby say something bad?' the little creature asked in such a miserable voice that I felt great pity for it.

'No,' I whispered, unable to tear my eyes away from the empty staircase. 'It's just me.'

xxx

I spent the remainder of the night on the armchair closest to the fire. Dobby added more logs and it roared away merrily while he cleaned up the common room. I half-heartedly offered to help, but he told me with a burst of pride that he was getting paid for it. He left just before dawn, and it was still a few hours before Hermione trudged down the stairs, yawning.

'Oh, here you are,' she said when she saw me. 'I was wondering where you'd got to.'

I didn't reply, instead sliding my fingers over the material of my shirt. 'Do you know what happened to my top? I met Dobby last night and he said there were rips and blood all over it.'

Hermione glanced at me, momentarily confused, then suddenly looked extremely uncomfortable. 'That was what you were wearing when the bad… thing… happened.'

'Oh,' I said, feeling my stomach plummet. What had I gone through? Bloods and rips and trauma – I was almost too scared to find out.

'Are you hungry?' Hermione was quick to change the subject.

I rubbed my stomach, abruptly aware of just how famished I was. I got up out of the chair and followed Hermione to the common room door.

She glanced over to the staircase Harry had gone up several hours earlier. 'Have you seen either of the boys?'

I swallowed hard and shook my head, unable to bear the thought of explaining what had happened between me and Harry.

But it wasn't my fault. I had decided, during my many hours in front of the fire, that Harry was dealing with his own problems. Just because he was kissing me one minute and walking away the next didn't mean I was to blame. It was his problem, not mine.

At least, that's what I hoped.

Hermione led me back downstairs to a giant hallway with four long tables running the length of the room. The place was empty, but there was a buffet spread out along the last table. Hermione took a seat and began piling scrambled eggs on the plate in front of her. I followed suit, opting for pancakes. I was having massive sugar cravings, and I knew exactly who to blame.

'Bloody Pip's gotten me addicted to sweets,' I said as I speared the stack.

Hermione gave me a sideways look. 'Pip?'

'Tonks,' I corrected. 'Whatever. The point is, she must be evil.'

Hermione giggled into her juice. 'No way. Even if she was, Voldermort would probably kick her out for being too chipper.'

I recognised the name. He had been mentioned in the meeting – he was the dark wizard that Harry and I had been prophesised to fight.

'That guy,' I said, 'is he really bad?'

Hermione swallowed her juice and nodded. 'But you'll beat him,' she said, cutting up a piece of toast.

'Right. As long as either me or Harry dies.'

'No. There's another way.' She shovelled a forkful of eggs into her mouth. 'Never trust prophecies to mean exactly what they say.'

'Talking with your mouthful, I see,' said a familiar voice. 'I'm obviously rubbing off on you.' Ron settled on the other side of Hermione and stole her cup, taking a swig.

Hermione snatched it back off him to wash down her eggs. 'Where's Harry?'

'Still asleep.'

'He probably had a late night,' I muttered, suddenly not hungry. I pushed my plate away.

'Yeah,' Ron said. He grabbed a fork and dug into Hermione's scrambled eggs, shoveling them into his mouth. 'Hoi doshent shleep mush deese daos.'

'He doesn't sleep much these days,' Hermione translated.

I stared down at my uneaten pancakes. 'Is there…?' I said, but I trailed off.

Hermione and Ron exchanged glances. 'Is there what?' Hermione said.

I tapped my nails against the table. 'Is there anything I can do… to help him? He seems to be… confused.'

'Confused?' Hermione said carefully. 'What do you mean?'

'I mean the mood swings,' I said in exasperation. 'What's going on with him?'

'He's been through something pretty awful –'

'Yeah, so have I, apparently, except no one will tell me anything.'

'There's a reason for that –'

'I _know_!' I said, losing my temper. 'I need to get my memories back slowly, blah blah blah. Would you just tell me whether or not his mood swings are my fault or not?'

Ron and Hermione suddenly found the table extremely interesting. They stared down at it, their eyes glued to the grainy texture.

My anger faded, replaced with sinking horror. I had expected them to vehemently deny it – I had assumed they would say Harry was dealing with personal issues, and reassure me that I had nothing to worry about.

So I _had_ done something wrong.

Any confidence that I had been struggling to build up over the past twenty-four hours crashed around me. Maybe I'd hurt him somehow. Maybe that's why he always turned cold after kissing me; because he was finding it too difficult to forgive me.

I surveyed the empty room, desperate to change the subject. 'Where are all the people from yesterday?' My voice came out high-pitched and shaky.

'Most of them still have jobs to do in the war,' Hermione said, sounding relieved to talk about something else. 'Professor Lupin might be somewhere around, though.' At my expression, she added, 'Remus.'

Ron snorted as he reached his fork out for a sausage amongst the buffet. 'I don't think he'll be available for a while. Tonks has only just come back after four months away. I'm sure they're having a grand old time, if you get my jist.'

'Lovely,' Hermione said with a roll of her eyes.

'Morning, all.'

A man with shaggy black hair and a big grin trotted up to us. I recognised him from the meeting, but I didn't know his name.

'Morning,' Ron said, and I heard much respect in his tone.

'Good morning,' Hermione said. 'Emma, this is Sirius Black. He's a Professor here.'

Sirius waved his hand dismissively. 'She knows who I am.'

'She's lost all her memories,' Ron said.

'Nah, they're in there. Somewhere.' He drummed his fingers on my head and squeezed in between me and Hermione on the bench. 'So, what are you guys up to today?' He reached for a handful of sausages.

'We were hoping to show Emma around,' Hermione said. 'As long as the place doesn't overwhelm her.'

I watched in astonishment as Sirius crammed one sausage into his mouth after another, but least he waited until he swallowed before speaking. 'She should be okay,' he said, nicking Hermione's cup and downing the rest of her juice. He smacked his lips and sighed in satisfaction. 'Just don't take her anywhere too meaningful.'

'We won't,' Ron and Hermione said quickly.

I stared down at the table. They were talking about the place where I'd been hurt. I should have cared, but my thoughts were very far away.

'I should probably get on a warmer coat or something,' I said, standing abruptly and climbing out from the bench.

'You can borrow one of mine,' Hermione said, getting to her feet as well.

I nodded. 'Thanks. I can get it on my own.'

'Okay. Just go through my trunk – there's a brown one right on the top.'

I waved a thank you, already halfway out of the hall. I barely remembered the way back, and took a few wrong turns before I found the common room again. I kept my eyes to the ground, refusing to listen as the portraits tried to point me in different directions.

I didn't have to go up to Harry's dorm – he was back down by the fire.

'Harry,' I said, closing the door behind me.

He didn't turn around. 'Please leave me alone.'

Pain spread like ice through my body. 'Harry, please just let me apologise –'

'I don't want to hear any – what?' He'd only just caught what I'd said, and he spun to me, shock written across his face. 'Apologise?' he said. 'For what?'

'For… for… for whatever it is I did to you last time I was here.' I was falling over my words, desperate to get them out before Harry had one of his mood swings and walked away again.

'What you did to me?' Harry echoed.

I gulped down tears. 'I'm sorry, I'm really, really sorry. I know it mustn't mean much, considering I don't actually remember what I did, but I want you to know that I –'

'Stop.'

'No, please, let me say this –'

'_Stop_.' His voice was so hard that it caused my heart to shrivel in my chest. I shrunk away from him. He looked at me with something akin to fury. 'You think… you think…' He had to take a moment to calm down and started again. 'You think _you_ did something wrong?'

I stepped back. 'Didn't I?'

He lunged forward and grabbed my shoulders before I even had a chance to react. 'Don't you ever think that,' he said through his teeth. 'You did nothing. _Nothing_. Do you hear me?' I nodded mutely. He released me, shaking his head. 'Unbelievable.'

I couldn't comprehend what was going on. If I wasn't responsible for anything, then why was he so enraged? What had made him angry?

He noticed my expression, and seemed to deflate. 'When you get your memories back, you'll understand.'

'Is it bad?' I said quietly.

He exhaled and looked away. 'You have no idea.'

I studied my nails, unable to handle the thought of going anywhere without him. 'So… um… seeing I don't have my memories back yet… did you want to come with Ron, Hermione and me while we take a tour of the castle?'

'No,' he murmured, making my heart sink. 'The less time we spend together, the better. Trust me.' He met my eyes. 'But you'll be cold outside.' I watched, bewildered, as he shrugged his jacket off – the same one he had leant me the previous day. 'Here,' he said, putting it around my shoulders. The heat engulfed me, like I had my very own blanket of sunshine. He rested his forehead against mine and closed his eyes. 'Wear it,' he said quietly. 'And always remember that you have never, ever done anything wrong.'

xxx

Hermione and Ron didn't say anything when I went back downstairs wearing Harry's jacket, but they kept glancing at it the entire day. I was glad I had it – outside was absolutely freezing. No human should be able to exist in such temperatures.

I tucked my hands underneath my arms as we battled the ice and snow to Hagrid's hut. He offered us hot tea and cookies, but Ron and Hermione quickly declined, claiming they were full from breakfast. I accepted the tea, hoping it would warm me up, but it was honestly the most disgusting thing I'd tasted in all my life. I had to throw it out of the window when Hagrid was getting the cookies out of the fireplace. The glass steamed up ominously as the snow outside melted from the hot water. Hermione was nice enough to keep Hagrid occupied, and thankfully he didn't notice anything.

It was amazing how much weight had lifted from me, knowing that I hadn't done anything to hurt Harry. Now, though, I fretted over what was actually bothering him. I knew there was something I could do to make it right, I just _knew_ it.

By early morning, Ron and Hermione had finally finished giving me the grand tour of the outside part of the castle. I'd seen the football pitch – although they called it something else – and the greenhouses and the gardens. Ron had also managed to take me halfway down to the lake before Hermione stopped him. Apparently that was one of the places that would be too 'meaningful'.

They also led me quickly past the back of the greenhouses, keeping a very casual air. I wouldn't have suspected anything if they hadn't gone overboard with their breeziness.

But I wasn't prepared to regain my memories just yet, considering the dire warnings everyone kept giving me, so I went along with them without argument.

The inside of the castle wasn't as cold as outdoors, but it was still draughty and dark. Every time we entered a room with a fireplace, I'd have to stay in there for at least five minutes to defrost.

'Haven't you guys heard of central heating?' I grumbled.

'Muggle technology doesn't work in Hogwarts,' Hermione said, then added at my expression, 'Muggles are non-magical people. Sorry, I forgot you didn't know that.'

We visited Remus, who was drawing up lesson plans in his office and poured us a delicious hot drink that finally took the taste of Hagrid's questionable tea from my mouth.

There were so many floors and twists and turns that I felt I would never find my way around. Ron and Hermione seemed right at home, but they had been attending the university a lot longer than me.

Our last stop was the dungeons. I paused at the top of the steps and peered down into the darkness. 'I probably don't need to see those,' I said.

'Don't be a baby,' Ron said, giving me a gentle nudge. 'We can go and visit Snapey while we're down here?'

'Snapey?' I said.

'Professor Severus Snape,' Hermione said, shooting a glare at Ron. 'Don't call him Snapey to his face, or he'll stew your insides for his next potions class.'

I felt the colour leave my cheeks. With this place, I wasn't sure what was a joke and what was real.

Ron patted my shoulder. 'Don't worry – Snapey liked you last time.'

'Oh,' I said, entirely unconvinced. 'Great.'

I kept my hands on the walls as we descended into the dungeons. Old fashion torches hung from the walls, their flames casting flickering shadows along the stone. I discretely dipped my head, inhaling the scent of Harry's jacket. It made me feel better, like he was close.

Hermione led me down the passage and stopped at a door with a big iron knocker. She banged on it with her fist. 'Professor Snape, are you there?'

'He was at yesterday's meeting,' Ron whispered in my ear. 'But you probably won't remember – there were a lot of people there.'

'No kidding,' I muttered under my breath.

Ron grinned. 'All the redheads were my family. There was a herd of them at the other end of the table. Did you see?'

I vaguely remembered a set of redhead twins waving at me, but I'd been too overwhelmed to really pay attention.

The door suddenly opened, and a man with a long nose surveyed us warily. 'What are you doing here?' He had a kind of drawl to his voice that creeped me out.

'Emma's doing the rounds,' Ron said cheerfully. 'She's meeting everyone for the second time.'

Professor Snape reached out and shook my hand. His skin was as cold as the air. 'You may call me Severus.'

'Why does _she_ get to call you Severus?' Ron demanded.

'Because she will not be my student this term,' Severus said.

Hermione frowned. 'So Professor Dumbledore's decided what to do with her?'

'Indeed,' Severus said, his beady black eyes fixed on me. 'She will practice _magic_.' He practically spat the word.

Ron laughed. 'Magic? Are you pulling our legs? She's a muggle!'

Severus scowled. 'Professor Dumbledore would like her to train for the task ahead –'

'Train?' I demanded. 'How? What could I possibly practice that might save me from a death prophecy?'

Severus looked down his nose at me. 'I trust, when I am training you, that you will learn not to interrupt.'

'_You're_ training her?' Ron said.

'Among others, provided she shows some kind of ability.'

'And Professor Dumbledore really thinks she'll be able to do magic?' Hermione said hesitantly.

'There are some possibilities – things that have to do with the mind,' Severus said. 'Similar to the power she already possesses. I suppose we shall see.'

He stepped back into his room and closed the door. I blinked at the wood before my nose, trying to comprehend what he'd said. 'Th-that's crazy,' I stuttered. 'I've never done magic before, have I?'

Ron and Hermione shook their heads.

I threw my hands up in the air in exasperation. 'This so-called psychic power isn't even working! How am I supposed to do all these other things?'

'Just give it time,' Hermione said soothingly. 'I'm sure once you recover from your trauma, your visions will come back.'

'She hasn't got _that_ much time,' Ron said. 'Harry's birthday is at the end of July.'

I paced between them. 'And we're fighting this dark wizard guy before then, right? So I pretty much have only seven months to live?'

Hermione sighed impatiently. 'I've told you a million times, the prophecy –'

I spun to her, cutting her off. 'How would you like it if _you_ were part of the prophecy? If _you_ were the one that was destined to have a 50 percent life expectancy in order to defeat some bad guy you'd never even heard of?'

'I know it's hard, but freaking out isn't going to get us anywhere,' Hermione said. 'I'm going to check the library and look up as many prophecies as I can. I'll find out how each one of them ended up, and see if I can work out some other meaning to the one about you and Harry.'

I missed the last few words of what she said. Images flashed through my mind, and feelings bubbled up inside me. I was sitting on my dorm bed, laughing with her about something. I felt good. Happy.

I shook my head to clear it. Hermione and Ron stared at me.

'Are you all right?' Ron said. 'Did you have a vision?'

I squinted, trying to recall what I'd seen. 'No,' I said breathlessly. 'A – a memory.'

Hermione's face shone with excitement. 'Your first memory? What was it about?'

'You, actually,' I said. I frowned at the stone floor. 'But it wasn't my first memory. I had another one, before I came back.'

'_Oh god… Emma…'_

'Really?' Ron said. 'What was it about?'

I flushed, unable to voice exactly what I'd heard and felt. I went with a half-truth. 'Just… someone calling my name.'

It was funny that I referred to it as my name now. Everyone around here was calling me Emma – I couldn't imagine being anyone else in this place.


	4. Surprises

**Chapter Four – Surprises**

The next day was Sunday. I wasn't looking forward to a whole bunch of students filling the campus that night, but I had bigger issues to deal with during the day.

I hadn't seen Harry since he'd given me his jacket, so I wore it as I trailed back down to the dungeons in order to have my first 'lesson' with Severus. Hermione had to show me where to go, of course, but she didn't come with me into Severus's office. She wished me luck and gave me a hug, glancing at my borrowed jacket one last time before leaving me to my fate.

I drew in a deep breath and used the iron knocker to announce my arrival. Severus opened the door, stepping aside to allow me access. 'Come in.'

He had sent a note to me during breakfast that morning via an owl. An _owl_. It was ludicrous – not to mention messy. For people who practiced magic, they sure had strange ways of doing things.

I walked into the dingy room and surveyed the place. A single black desk sat in the middle, polished and bare of tools. Shelves lined the walls, holding all sorts of things: jars, instruments, boxes, animals (dead and alive), crystals – I could have examined the place for hours.

'Sit,' Severus said.

I felt like a goddam dog, but I drew up a chair on the visitor's side of the desk. Severus took a seat opposite, studying me over steepled fingers.

'So…' I said awkwardly, wondering if I was supposed to make conversation. 'How are you?'

'Close your eyes.'

Okay, that was a 'no' on conversation. I stared at him, wondering whether I was safe if I shut my eyes. He waited patiently. With much reluctance, I did as he asked. I curled my fingers around the sleeve of Harry's jacket to make me feel better.

'Clear your mind,' Severus said.

I frowned, keeping my eyes closed. 'How come?'

'Professor Dumbledore would like to discover your potential,' he said.

'But what does that mean?'

'It means we must check to see if you can do magic – any kind of magic, in the hopes of keeping you alive.'

'But you don't believe I can do anything.'

'Correct,' Severus said. 'You have been going to classes for several months and have shown no particular abilities. However, we shall see…'

I was suddenly inundated with images. Memories flooded through my head of my dull existence for the past four months, then further back, when I was dating my boyfriend, then even further back –

'You were an orphan?'

I gasped as the images suddenly stopped. My eyes flung open. 'W…what?' I said shakily.

'You grew up in an orphanage, am I correct?'

'How…? Wait, did you see all that stuff just then?'

'It's called Legilimency. Have you told Harry you are an orphan?'

I was baffled by his strange change of topic. 'Not that I know of,' I said. 'But I don't have any memories of being here – I might have told him and I just don't remember it. Why were you reading my mind?'

'Harry is already skilled at Occlumency – the art of blocking anyone using Legilimency – and if possible, you should be taught too. I suggest you bring it up with Harry.'

'Legitimacy?'

'_Legilimency_,' Severus corrected. 'And no, you being an orphan.'

'What does that have to do with Harry?'

'You are aware that he is one too?'

I shook my head. 'No, I didn't know.'

'You used to,' Severus said. 'It was common knowledge within the books written about him.'

'Yeah, well you guys wiped all that stuff out of my mind, didn't you?' I said dryly.

'Not wiped,' Severus said. 'Blanketed. We covered your memories – we knew you'd be needing them again soon. The magic was performed in such a way that you will gradually remember all that was lost, and hopefully not return to your damaged state in the process.'

'_Damaged state?_' I said shrilly.

Severus didn't answer. Instead, he changed the topic again. 'Now, to perform Occlumency, you need to have complete control of your mind. You need to be calm and clear.'

'Why do you think I'll need this?' I said.

'If Voldermort ever probed deep enough in your mind to uncover those memories we blanketed, you will no longer be the key to _our_ victory, but to his.'

'How so?'

'It is not my job to tell you. Now close your eyes and clear your mind.'

I tried, but my thoughts were a swirling mess. What was it that I knew that was so dangerous? I failed helplessly as Severus intruded into my mind again, and all the visions that passed were of Harry.

'This is dreadful,' Severus said, snapping me out of my dazed state. 'Voldermort's job will be a piece of cake.'

'Well what else can you expect from me?' I demanded.

'I wasn't talking about your poor resistance,' Severus said sharply.

I was confused for a moment, then felt my face heat up when I realised that he was talking about _what_ he saw. 'Does it really matter?' I said hoarsely, staring at his desk. 'How is he going to use my feelings to his advantage?'

'It is not my place to discuss it,' Severus said. His lack of information was infuriating. 'Shall we try it again?'

'What's the point?' I muttered. 'I obviously can't do it.'

'No one can do it immediately,' Severus said. 'I will give you a moment to calm yourself. Please keep in mind that if you can't master this, Harry may die.'

What kind of pressure was this? I felt exasperation well up inside me. I had no magic, and they were expecting me to perform miracles. I didn't even have my psychic power back yet.

'Ready?' Severus said, and I panicked. Of course I wasn't ready! I quickly tried to wipe my mind free of any thoughts. 'One, two, three…'

I cried out as more images flew past; of all the things that had happened to me the past few days. They were jumbled and confused, customers smiling at me, Malfoy standing on the counter, Simon on the ground, Harry at the checkout –

'_Oh god… Emma…_'

Like a steel trap, my mind snapped shut. I felt humiliation well up inside me; I knew that particular echo was a very personal memory.

I opened my eyes, not even remembering closing them, and gained my bearings. I was feeling a little nauseous from the experience. Severus was staring fixedly at me, and my face flushed. 'Th…that was a memory from before – one of the ones I don't remember,' I choked out, realizing I wasn't making much sense. 'I don't know what it is or when it happened –'

'What do you mean?' Severus said.

'The… the last thing, before you stopped it.'

'All I heard was someone say your name,' Severus said, 'and I didn't stop it.'

This caught me off guard. 'What do you mean? Yes you did.'

'You are mistaken. I did not stop it. _You_ stopped it.'

'What?' As soon as I said it, I grasped what he was telling me. 'I did it? I blocked you?'

Severus was rubbing his mouth in agitation. 'This is astounding. It has put in to question all the laws of magic, broken the boundaries between muggles and wizards… I am utterly stumped.'

I was too excited by the fact that I had managed to stop him to worry about his anxieties. 'That is so cool!'

'I am hoping it is just because you are skilled with magic of the mind,' Severus said, getting to his feet. 'I expect to see you unable to perform any other impossible feats. I shall have to speak with Professor Dumbledore immediately. You may go.'

I walked out with shaking legs, my mind unable to work out whether what had happened was good or bad. I managed to find my way out of the dungeons, but after that, I didn't have a clue where I was going. I wandered around for a long time, attempting to imagine the talking portraits were just televisions hanging on the wall.

Televisions that were trying to have conversations with me.

I stopped when I reached a tapestry of two wizards pointing wands at each other. I was sure I'd seen it before. I realised with a groan that I'd been walking around in circles.

'Okay,' I said with a sigh, turning to a painting of a pretty lady holding a water urn. 'I give up. Can you tell me where the big dining hall is?'

Unable to take her hands off the heavy urn, the girl nodded her head to my right. 'It's that way.'

'You're mistaken, dear,' said an elderly woman in the portrait beside her. She peered down over her spectacles at me. 'Don't listen to the girl – she's only a young one. The Great Hall is in the other direction.'

'No no no,' said a plump man in the painting above her. 'I believe it's to her right, and then she turns left.'

'No, it's definitely left than left,' said a teenager sitting on the branch of a tree in the picture on the other side of the wall.

'Your left, or my left?' said the plump man.

I moaned and covered my ears. 'This isn't helping!'

The portraits continued to bicker amongst themselves, and I turned to leave. I stopped short when my eyes fell upon a vase sitting on a stand beside the tapestry. I recognised that vase – how the streams of blue stood out from the dingy brown clay.

I walked over to it, trying to drown out the voices behind me so I could concentrate. It was like trying to remember a dream.

If I stood on one side of it, I could visualise myself walking down the passage. I followed the memory, taking each step with slow caution.

Step, step, step…

And then stop.

My feet skidded to a halt, even though I was only halfway down the passage. I turned, expecting to see a wall, but half-expecting something else.

I was right. There was a sharp corner into a passage in the wall. It was difficult to see unless you were standing right in front of it. I could have walked around forever and never noticed it.

Exhaling in relief, I rushed down the passage and found myself out in the open. I recognised where I was, and after a few more turns I was in the Great Hall.

To my utter relief, Remus and Sirius Black were having lunch. 'Thank god,' I said, plonking myself beside them and reaching out for a slice of cold beef. 'I thought I'd never find my way back.'

Remus handed me a pitcher. 'How was your lesson with Severus?'

I grabbed a goblet and poured the water. 'I don't know. Good… I suppose. Although he seemed a bit freaked out.'

'How come?' Sirius said before packing half a sandwich into his mouth.

I shrugged and put the pitcher down. 'I managed to Accumulate him, or whatever.'

Remus paused, his fork halfway to his mouth. Sirius choked on his sandwich. Remus picked up his wand from the table and waved it at him. _'Anapneo_,' he said with a sigh, as though he did it a lot.

The spell dislodged whatever had caught in Sirius's throat, and he swallowed hard, thumping his chest. 'Thanks.' He glanced at me when he'd caught his breath. 'You performed Occlumency?'

'Apparently.'

Remus and Sirius exchanged looks. 'Emma,' Remus said slowly. 'Are you saying you stopped Severus from reading your mind?'

'Yeah – which is a good thing, too. He was getting into some personal stuff.'

'We should talk to Dumbledore,' Sirius said lowly to Remus.

'Weren't you supposed to see Harry after lunch?' Remus said.

My heart lurched at the name.

Sirius slapped his forehead. 'Oh yeah.'

'What are you seeing him about?' I asked, then couldn't help adding, 'Can I come with you?'

Sirius pursed his lips. 'Better not. I think it's one of those godfather-to-godson talks.'

'You're his godfather?' I said.

Sirius nodded, rising. 'I should go.'

Remus got to his feet as well. My face fell. 'You guys aren't staying?'

'Sorry,' Remus said. 'But Ron and Hermione are in the library, if you want to meet them there.'

'Where's the library?'

The men were already hurrying away. 'Just ask the portraits,' Remus called out behind him.

Yeah, right. Because they were so very helpful.

xxx

To my absolute astonishment, I remembered the way. My feet moved automatically, like I was using memories from a past life to get me there.

The place was enormous, with high arch ceilings and a never-ending line of shelves, filled with ancient, dusty books. I walked along the aisles, looking for Ron and Hermione. No one was around. I could have just called out, but the place had a creepy atmosphere, and I felt like I'd awaken some terrifying ghost if I made too much noise.

I found the pair eventually, behind a shelf filled with yellowing encyclopaedias, but I quickly wish I hadn't.

'Oh, sheesh, sorry!' I gasped, jumping back behind the shelf.

Hermione giggled and popped out, straightening her hair. 'It's okay,' she said, her face flushed and her clothes askew. 'We were just kissing.'

I turned away. 'I'll leave you guys to it, then –'

'No, stay,' Hermione said, grabbing my arm. 'Tell us what happened with Professor Snape.'

I hesitated. 'He had a bit of a tantrum because I stopped him from reading his mind.'

'No way,' Ron said, leaping out from behind the shelves. His face was still as red as his hair, but the blush was dying down as he fixed his attention on me. 'You seriously did it?'

I nodded.

'But that's impossible,' Hermione said, looking awed. 'Can you do any other magic?'

I shrugged. 'No idea. Never tried… as far as I know.'

'You've been in classes with us, but you've never actually performed a spell or anything,' Hermione said. She pulled out her wand from her jeans pocket and handed it to me. 'Here. Let's see if you can do something basic. Try… um… _Wingardium Leviosa_. Swish and flick the wand, like this, see? Try using it on my hair band.'

She pulled out her hair and placed her band on the desk. I felt a bit silly. I was waving about a stick of wood and saying nonsense words. When I still couldn't do it after a couple of tries, Hermione took her wand back and showed me with one of the library books. I watched in amazement as the textbook hovered in the air and gently returned to the desk. She handed the wand back to me.

'See my wrist movement when I flicked the wand? Try it again.'

I concentrated hard and said the words, but still nothing happened. 'Sorry,' I said, handing her back the wand. 'Guess I can't do it.'

'What a shame,' Hermione said. 'It would have been extremely useful if you were able to do magic. Although Occlumency is still a valuable skill, and pretty advanced stuff. Ron can't do it to save his life.'

Ron looked indignant. 'Well, who would bother trying to read my mind, anyway?'

Hermione giggled and nudged his arm. 'That's true. There's not much in there.'

'Hey!'

I changed the subject before an argument could start. 'Why do you guys think it's important to Harry that I'm an orphan?'

'You're an orphan?' Ron said.

'I didn't tell you guys?' I said in surprise.

'You didn't say a word about your other life while you were here,' Hermione said. 'We understood – we figured it was to protect yourself and the people you had back at home.'

'Well, I don't have anyone there now,' I said as it occurred to me that I had left nothing behind. 'The only people who would have noticed my disappearance were my housemate and my boss, and both of them are here.'

'That must be a relief,' Hermione said. 'What a weight off. It's lucky – otherwise you might have been spending every minute here worrying whether Voldermort was going to go after your family or friends.'

'Do you worry about your family?' I asked.

'They're muggles; Voldermort wouldn't be able to find them,' Hermione said. 'He has the resources readily available to him, but he'd refuse to use muggle technology, even for something like this. His arrogance is definitely his downfall.'

I hoped that was the case. This guy sounded pretty scary. I gazed out of the window, watching as white flakes swirled in the air. We were a few storeys up, and I could see mountains stretch out along the distant horizon.

'Are you okay?' Hermione said.

'It's very nice here,' I said, walking to the window. I didn't want to think about Voldermort. I didn't want to think about dying.

My eyes fell upon two figures below, sitting on a bench out in the snow. My breath caught when I recognised Harry. He was out there without his jacket… because I had it.

Sirius was there too; he got up and started pacing in front of Harry.

'What are they doing?' I said.

Ron came up behind me and peered over my shoulder. 'Talking, probably. They talk a lot.'

Harry buried his head in his gloved hands, and Sirius knelt down, trying to comfort him. He looked so sad.

I rested my forehead against the chilly window. 'Why is he upset?' I whispered. My breath fogged up the glass.

'He's always upset these days, ever since –'

Ron stopped, and I turned to him. He quickly dropped his gaze. 'Never mind.'

'Good afternoon.'

We turned as Dumbledore approached us. Hermione brightened. 'Hello. Have you heard what Emma can do?'

'Indeed I have.'

'Is it really that unbelievable?' I said.

'Of course not,' Dumbledore said, his eyes twinkling. 'Otherwise I would have not asked Severus to try it.'

'Well I can't do anything other magic,' I muttered, hoping I wasn't disappointing him. 'I tried, and nothing happened.'

'Yes, there are certain wands which even I cannot attempt to do even a hint of magic,' Dumbledore said. 'It all depends on whether you are compatible. Only one wand will truly work for you – they are unique, just like us.'

'Well, it might take me a long time to find something that works,' I said.

'Naturally, if we were to do it with trial and error, we may be lost in a sea of wood,' said Dumbledore. I felt he had something planned, and I was not let down. 'However, there happens to be an expert in this very country who can help you find a match, if you can indeed do magic.' He smiled warmly. 'As it is not safe for you to leave the grounds, I shall call for him. Would you be interested?'

I glanced nervously at Ron and Hermione, but I was met with encouraging smiles, so I agreed.

'Excellent,' Dumbledore said. 'I shall ask him to take time out of his busy schedule, and hopefully beseech him to join us as soon as he can.' He nodded in acknowledgement to Ron and Hermione before turning to leave, then stopped and glanced back at me. 'By the way, I believe Remus wants to speak to you. He's back at the Great Hall.' He disappeared down the aisles.

'Do you need us to come with you?' Hermione said. She gestured to the pile of books on the study desk by the window. I hadn't noticed them before. 'We were researching old prophecies, but I could use a break if you need help finding your way around.'

I shook my head. 'I'm okay, actually. I think I'm starting to remember this place a bit.'

I didn't get lost once on my way back. Remus was by the entrance to the Great Hall, pacing nervously.

'What's wrong?' I said.

He spun to me. 'Can we take a walk?'

'Sure.' I followed him down a passageway, in a direction I hadn't been before. I stayed silent, waiting for him to speak.

'One of the last things I said to you before you left,' he said after a long silence, 'was pretty harsh. Scrub that, it was downright cruel. I was panicking and the whole thing was plain chaotic… but I suppose there's no excuse. It made things worse when you were forced to endure something no innocent person should ever go through. I watched you suffer and thought I'd never be able to apologise for what I said.' He stopped by a wooden torch on the wall and faced me. 'I'd like to say sorry now, in case you refuse to hear me out later. I didn't mean a word of what I said, and I whole-heartedly regret losing my temper at you.'

'You're forgiven,' I said with a shrug.

'Please don't say that yet,' he said. 'I'd like to discuss this with you after your memory of the event has returned. It's not the same – it's like being forgiven by someone else.' He took my hands in his. 'You must do the same to anyone else who apologises to you. Don't be ready to forgive them until you become the person who they're apologising to. It would be terrible if you took it back later. Do you promise to do what I ask?'

I nodded, though I was puzzled by his request. It didn't bother me what these people had done in the past; all that mattered was they cared about me now.


	5. Students

Welcome to everyone who's clicked here due to author/story alerts. This story has undergone massive revision (ie it's completely rewritten), so if you'd like to skip on over to chapter one, we'll catch up with you in a few ;)

**Chapter Five – Students**

After much debate about what I should do when the students arrived, Hermione finally convinced me that the best approach would be to face them bravely. That might have been the old me, but the new me was absolutely petrified.

I stood in the dorm room, trembling, as I heard the common room downstairs fill up with chatter and noise. Hermione stood by her bed, prepared to jump in to help if necessary. It was a comfort having her there.

All too soon, there was the thundering sound of people coming up the stairs. I clenched my fists to give myself something to focus on. It wasn't too late to hide under the bed.

But instead I wrapped Harry's jacket tighter around myself. It had kind of become my security blanket, even if the owner was avoiding me at all costs.

Two girls walked into the room, carrying travel trunks and giggling between themselves. The girl with sleek black hair saw me first, and stopped in her tracks. Her confusion was swiftly replaced by a sneer. 'Thought we'd gotten rid of you.'

The plumper girl of the pair snickered. 'Look, she's even wearing his jacket. What's the matter, whore, don't they pay you enough to buy your own clothes?'

Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Hermione slip out her wand.

'Maybe Harry gets off on the squib wearing his clothes,' said the first girl.

I didn't really understand the significance of a squib slave. These girls weren't a part of my world. I had the weight of the third prophecy on my shoulders.

And yet… their words hurt. Maybe I had been strong before, keeping the bigger picture in mind as I endured insults and abuse. But now I was a different girl – a weaker girl.

Hermione tucked her wand away and strode forward, grabbing my arm. 'Come on, Emma, we don't need to speak to them.'

'We should tell Professor Dumbledore that we don't feel comfortable sharing a dorm with a prostitute,' the larger girl said as we passed the two.

The other girl laughed. 'Yeah, right, like he'd listen to us. Didn't Malfoy say it was _him_ who's paying for the slut?'

I waited until we were halfway down the stairs before leaning towards Hermione. 'Malfoy?' I hissed.

Hermione hesitated. 'He was a student here last term, and the reason you had to pose as a squib slave. He was exposed as a Death Eater when –' She stopped abruptly.

I stared at her. 'It was him, wasn't it? The person who hurt me.'

'I can't answer that,' Hermione said. 'But he was involved, yes.'

Things were starting to come together. Maybe that was why Harry had taken the Torture Curse in my place – because he had felt guilty that Malfoy had already hurt me. It made sense.

I felt infinitely better, now that I had some sort of answer.

When we reached the common room, however, my self esteem took a massive hit. The hoards of Fourth Years stared, and whispered, and sneered as we passed. One boy even spat at me. Hermione pointed her wand at him, and he walked away with legs that moved like jelly. I would have found it funny if I wasn't so unnerved.

Hermione noticed my mood, and thankfully didn't try to persuade me to go down to dinner. She took me back upstairs when the place emptied, and showed me how to close the hangings around my bed so that they were locked and soundproof.

I remained up in the dorm room, imagining all the students having dinner, catching up, laughing happily with their friends. I wandered over to the window, staring out over the grounds.

They were all so mean to me. Didn't they understand that I was risking my life for them? Didn't they get that I wasn't some servant? Couldn't they see that I was just like them?

They didn't seem to care that I had seen a coworker killed right in front of me, or that I had been taken from my home, or that I might be giving up my life in the next few months to save them. It wasn't fair.

'Well, well, the squib girl's finally alone.'

I spun, backing against the wall as the sleek, dark-haired girl sauntered towards me, a smirk on her face and her wand in her hand.

'Leave me alone,' I said, willing my voice not to shake. 'I never did anything to you.'

'You exist, don't you?' the girl sneered. She tilted her head, her eyes on my outfit. 'Look at the way you cling to that jacket. What's the big deal about it, Emma?'

I release my grip on the sleeves. I hadn't even realised I was holding onto it so tightly.

The girl pursed her lips. 'Seamus said something about Harry being in love with you last term.'

I didn't know who Seamus was, so I kept my mouth shut. My eyes darted frantically, trying to find a way to make it past the girl and to the door. If I could just get downstairs…

'Everyone's at dinner,' the girl said, noticing my inattention. 'You'd never escape in time.'

'You're going to be in huge trouble if you hurt me,' I said shakily.

The girl smirked. 'Oh, I doubt that. _Confundo._'

My arm hurt. No – was that me?

Where… was I?

Falling – ouch. Bricks. Cement. Cold… it was cold. I needed warmth. Heat.

No… no… too hot –

Who was screaming?

'_Aguamenti!_'

Cold again. Wet. Very cold.

'Harry, she's hurt.'

Girl… touching my face. Stranger. 'Leave me alone! Who are you?'

'I think someone's put a Confundus Charm on her. Here, help me lift her up.'

People… pulling at me… Strangers…

'Emma, calm down. Stop struggling.'

Voice. I knew that voice. I staggered blindly. 'Harry –'

'Emma, listen to me. Who did this to you?'

Where was he? 'I can't see you…'

'I'm just here, right here.'

Someone took my hand; I could feel his face. The world moved jaggedly in front of me. 'Harry?'

'Who did this to you?'

'I don't… know. I don't remember… anything.' I tried to take in my surroundings, but everything felt upside down. 'Are we moving?'

'Hermione and I are on either side of you. We're taking you to the hospital ward. Again.' Bitterness crept into his voice.

I flinched back. 'You hate me.'

Warmth against my temple. Gentle. Wonderful. 'Never,' he said against my skin.

I turned to the warmth, but he disappeared. Moved away.

The world slowly came into focus. I could see down; watching as my feet took one step after another. My arms were around two bodies, which kept me standing.

'We're almost there,' Hermione said.

'Hermione,' I said. She wasn't a stranger.

'I think the spell's wearing off. Emma, can you hear me?'

I nodded, but I was too sick to turn to her. It felt like I would vomit if I lifted my head.

'Do you remember who did it?' Harry's voice forced my heart into my throat. I swallowed hard and shook my head, unable to speak.

I winced as a sudden pain ripped through my arm. I tried to pull away from the two, but they held me firmly in place.

'My arm – my arm,' I said, fighting against them.

'I know, someone slashed it,' Harry said. 'Easily fixed, I promise.'

'And you burnt yourself,' Hermione said. 'We found you trying to get into the fireplace.'

'In the…?' I was feeling dizzy again. I remembered feeling too hot, and being drenched with water. Had I been on fire?

'How low can these people get?' Hermione muttered beneath her breath. 'Not to mention Emma's mind is so fragile right now. That Confundus Charm might have really screwed her up.'

'Hermione,' Harry said, sounding strained.

'Sorry. I'm just saying. Whoever did this has to pay.' I sensed her turn to me. 'Are you sure you don't have any idea who was with you before you got confused?'

I shook my head. 'You… went down to dinner, and someone was in the dorm room. But I don't know who.'

'I'll find out,' Harry said through his teeth.

We reached the hospital wing. I was still a little dazed, but the nurse gave me something warm to drink, and I don't remember what happened after that, except I woke up in the morning, and everyone had gone.

I sat up, checking my arms and feeling for any bumps on my head. I had a terrible feeling that I'd fallen down a flight of stairs. Damn, it was like waking up after a big night out.

A matronly-looking woman bustled into the wing. She beamed when she saw me. 'Good morning.'

'Hello,' I said warily. 'Where is everyone?'

'They wanted to stay, but I sent them off to bed.' She fussed around me, waving her wand. I wasn't sure what she was doing, but she seemed satisfied by the results. She caught me glancing towards the door. 'Don't worry, love, they'll be back any –'

She didn't even get to finish her sentence before the door swung open and four people burst inside. Remus and Sirius were wearing strange black robes – I wondered if it was because they were professors. The nurse put her hands on her hips. 'The entourage is back.'

'Sorry,' Ron said with a toothy grin. 'We're just checking up on her.'

'How are you?' Remus said, coming over and studying my eyes.

'Fine… I think,' I said.

Remus held his finger up in front of my face and got me to follow its path in the air. 'Do you feel confused at all?'

'What's your name?' Ron said. 'What's the date? Who's the Ministry of Magic?'

Hermione huffed and rolled her eyes. 'Ron, she's not going to know that, anyway.'

Ron reddened. 'Oh yeah. Sorry. It's just – that's what they always ask amnesia patients.'

Sirius pushed past Remus to talk to me. 'Are you _sure_ you don't remember who did this to you?'

I shook my head. 'It's all just a blur.'

'She's not ending up in here again.'

It was astonishing that his voice still made my breath catch in my throat. My gaze rose as Harry strode into the room, his face filled with determination.

'We're going to have one of us watching her around the clock.'

My face fell. 'Around… the clock?'

'It's probably the best way to keep you safe,' Hermione said, looking awkward.

'Hermione, you can stick with her for most of the time. If you're not available, organise for Ron to take over. If neither of you can do it, we'll have Remus or Siruis on the job.'

'What about you?' I said. I mentally kicked myself. The words had come out without me even thinking about it.

He hadn't met my gaze the entire time, and now he was trying even harder not to look at me. 'That's probably not a good idea. For many reasons.'

'The first being that Harry's been a target for plenty of attacks, too,' Remus said quickly. 'Normally, Emma, you stayed with him to protect him from hexes and jinxes, because your visions warned you in advance. But your power isn't working at the moment, so…'

'I'm useless,' I muttered. I hated being useless.

'Hello?' Ron said. 'You're the key, remember?' He hesitated. 'You… _do_ remember… right?'

'Yes, yes,' I said grumpily. 'Destined to die at the hands of some dark wizard.'

'You're not going to die,' Remus said firmly.

'Ah, don't listen to her,' Hermione said with a dismissive wave. 'She's just cranky.'

Remus dug into his robe and withdrew a block of chocolate. 'Here,' he said. 'This will make you feel better.'

I groaned and took it. 'Between you and Tonks, I'm going to end up a blimp.'

xxx

Harry hadn't been kidding when he said he'd put me on an around-the-clock watch. Hermione spent every free period with me, and meal times, and night times, as I slowly got used to the time difference. When she had class, Ron would stay with me. When they both had classes, Remus or Sirius would check up on me. None of the students approached me – I had a feeling Dumbledore had addressed the student body while I was in the hospital wing.

But I saw neither he nor Severus as day continued to pass, which was strange, because I thought they'd be going on and on about my ability to block any mind reading. From what I heard from Remus, though, they'd both left the campus for secret business. Hermione mentioned that another professor had taken over Severus's classes, and Dumbledore's office was locked up.

'Where do you think they are?' Ron said as he poured over an old text one afternoon.

Hermione scanned the library shelves, checking book spines against a reference list in her hand. 'Probably looking for Ollivander, if Dumbledore was serious about getting Emma a wand.'

I glanced up from the book I was reading. 'Ollivander?'

'The best wand-maker in the world,' Hermione said absently. 'I thought he was just in Diagon Alley, but maybe he's on holiday or something.'

My attention returned to my book. It was ancient and heavy, and its pages were crumply. I loved the feel of it, as though it contained secrets of the world – which, in a way, it did.

But I also hated it, because the text was written in an old English style, and I barely understood what it was saying. I was pretty sure it had information on how a certain prophecy came about in the late 1700's, but I couldn't work out any events from what was written. There were too many 'haths' and 'thees' and 'thys', and the structure was all jumbled. Plus, one sentence would just go on and on and on. For a _paragraph_. I'd reread the chapter seven times, and still nothing was sinking in.

I gave up and stared at the window. The sky was blue today, but it was still freezing. Harry's jacket remained firmly around my shoulders. It had been ripped in the attack – the nurse had had to repair it with a spell, and now there was a little permanent crinkle in the arm.

'Guys.'

We all glanced up as Harry approached. He didn't look at me, as usual, instead addressing Ron and Hermione. 'Dumbledore and Snape are back. They want you to come to the meeting room. With… with Emma.'

His eyes flashed to me, just for a moment. It didn't come close to fulfilling the craving I had for his attention, but I acted nonchalant.

'Okay,' I said, closing the old book and getting up from my chair.

We walked through the castle as a tightly knit group. I know the three of them were looking out for stray spells or jinxes that might 'accidentally' hit me. Harry walked as far away from me as he dared, but I was still hyper-aware of his presence. I'd barely seen him, so any time he was around had a shocking affect on me.

We walked up a lot of staircases before reaching the meeting room. It was set up differently from the last time I'd seen it – there was no table or treats out – but it had just as many people inside. They were all chatting amongst themselves.

'Blimey, the whole Order's here,' Ron said in astonishment.

I caught sight of Tonks and waved to her. She left Remus and squeezed her way through the crowd, giving me a hearty hug. 'Hello, love! How are you?'

'Don't ask,' I said with a groan.

'But the depression's gone, I hear?'

'Yes.' I didn't say that Harry had been the cause, because he was still in earshot.

'And have you gotten any memories back?' Tonks said.

She released me, and I shrugged. 'Mostly just of the castle. I've had a few flashes of Ron and Hermione.'

'Any of Harry?'

I risked a glance in his direction. He was facing the other way, but his body was still, and I had a suspicion he was listening.

'No,' I murmured to Tonks. 'Nothing yet. Just… feelings.'

'There she is,' said a booming voice, and a large hand slapped my back.

I turned with a smile. 'Hello, Aaron.'

'Kingsley,' he said.

I made a face. 'You'll always be Aaron to me.'

Hermione and Ron had dashed over to Dumbledore. It looked like they were bombarding him with questions.

Hagrid caught my eye from across the room and lifted up a giant pitcher. He had a big grin on his face. 'I brought some more of my tea, seein' you liked it so much last time.'

I grimaced, then quickly tried to turn it into a smile. Tonks giggled quietly beside me, and I pinched her arm. 'You'd better help me drink it.'

'No way am I touching that stuff,' Tonks said with a snigger.

I let out a sigh as Dumbledore held up his hands for attention. The room fell quiet. 'Now that Emma's here, we shall begin,' he said. 'Mr Ollivander, if you please.' He stepped sideways to reveal an elderly man I'd never seen before. He was wearing a grey vest with a tape measure hanging around his neck, and looked ordinary enough, except that his pale blue eyes creeped the hell out of me.

'Which one is she?' he asked in a wispy voice.

Dumbledore held his hand out to me. 'Come along, Emma.'

Tonks had to give me a bit of a push, and I stumbled forward. People moved out of the way to make a path for me. Mr Ollivander regarded me through small spectacles. I shrunk beneath his scrutiny.

He circled me, taking his tape measure off and holding it down my arm, across my shoulders, the length of my body…

He stepped back and stroked his chin. 'Hmm,' he said. 'This is very peculiar.'

I was alarmed to find the tape measure was still moving on its own. It took all of my willpower to stay in my spot, rather than running and screaming from the room.

The others didn't seem at all fazed by the living tape measure. 'Just as I suspected,' Severus said triumphantly. 'She isn't suited to a wand at all, is she?'

'Actually,' said Mr Ollivander, 'she is. I've never been so certain so quickly. The problem is; I've already sold it.'

'What?' the room said in a chorus of incredulity.

Only Dumbledore seemed calm. 'What kind of wand was it?' he said. His tone made me suspect he already knew the answer.

'Holly and Phoenix feather,' Mr Ollivander said, not taking his misty eyes off me. 'Eleven inches.'

'That's impossible!' Harry said.

'Oh my,' Dumbledore said, but he was smiling.

'What could be the meaning of this?' demanded the strict-looking woman, whose name I suddenly remembered to be Minerva.

I hated how everyone was staring at me, and I was frustrated that I didn't understand what the big deal was. 'Who has it?' I said.

No one answered until Hermione stepped forward, looking worried. 'Harry,' she said quietly.

I struggled to keep my legs from crumbling beneath me. 'W…what?'

'Harry has the wand you're supposed to use,' Hermione said.

I spun to Harry, but he was staring at the ground.

'I wonder how this is possible,' Mr Ollivander said, his gaze sliding from me to Harry.

'Many seemingly impossible things have been occurring recently,' said Dumbledore. He put a gentle hand on Mr Ollivander's shoulder, leading him towards the door. 'I thank you for your time, and assure you that your services will not go unrewarded. Hagrid?'

Hagrid opened the door and led Mr Ollivander out of the room. The door closed quietly behind them. There was a moment of silence, before everyone started talking at once – some questions directed at me, others at Harry.

'How did this happen?'

'Did you always have magic?'

'Does this mean Emma has identical magic to you?'

'Have you tried using Harry's wand before?'

'Shall we test the theory, then?' Dumbledore said over the noise.

The chatter died down as Harry took out his wand. He was still trying to avoid my eye as he walked across the room. I reluctantly held out my hand. Everyone stared at me. I was shaking as I took the wand from him. Immediately, the wood felt warm and sparks flew from the tip.

'No way,' Ron said. 'This is _so cool_!'

'But how…?' Remus breathed.

Hermione was frowning as if trying to remember something. 'Magic sparks,' she said. As one, the room turned to her. She pinched the bridge of her nose, willing the memory to return. 'When Emma first arrived, every time she touched Harry's skin she felt electric shocks. I told her it was probably magic sparks.'

'Right,' Harry said as I handed his wand back to him. 'She often mentioned it. Actually, she said the feeling disappeared after –'

He stopped short. His face turned a strange shade of white.

'After what?' Hermione said. She looked as though she was going to implode from the suspense.

I felt my whole body tense up. My skin prickled in anticipation. I had a feeling something important was about to be revealed.

But Harry shook his head. 'No, I can't.'

Frustration and disappointment welled up inside me. I was sick of not knowing anything; sick of walking around without my memories.

'Go on,' Remus said to Harry.

'Emma can leave if you don't want her to hear,' said Ron.

'No way,' I snapped. I refused to miss any more information.

'Come on, Harry,' Hermione said. 'This might be vital. Obviously your magic was somehow being conveyed or copied into Emma every time you touched her. What could possible have happened to have caused a permanent transferal –' She gasped and slammed her hand over her mouth. Something had registered in her mind.

A strange, tense mood settled in the room.

Ron turned bright red. Tonks looked the other way; in fact, _no one_ was facing me. I felt very stupid when I was the only one who hadn't figured out what was going on.

Hermione was staring at me, her hand still over her mouth and a blush on her cheeks. It was the same flustered look she'd had when I'd caught her and Ron kissing in the library –

'_Oh god… Emma…'_

'Oh,' I said quietly.

The voice was him. The memory was of _him_.

'Who wants afternoon tea?' Sirius said quickly, and the group scrambled out of the room faster than if they had used magic.

I didn't move, staring at the ground as bodies filed past me. Harry remained frozen in his spot. I flinched as the door closed behind the last person.

It was just us.

'We slept together,' I said at last. I couldn't tear my eyes away from the carpet. It was white, and plush, and much too pure for the conversation.

'Yes,' Harry said.

I couldn't bear to raise my head; to see if he was looking at me. I didn't know what I was feeling. Joy, certainly. But it was tangled up amongst fear, anxiety, and panic.

I swallowed, trying to dislodge the lump in my throat. 'Did you love me?'

'Yes.'

'Do… do you still love me?'

A pause. My heart literally stopped beating until he answered.

'Yes,' he said at last.

I let out my breath, finally lifting my gaze to him. He was standing against the wall, as far from me as possible. His eyes were fixed on the pitcher of Hagrid's tea, which sat alone on the windowsill.

'So why don't you want to be around me anymore?' I said. 'Is it guilt?'

He pressed his lips together and nodded.

I stepped towards him, stopping when he cringed back. 'Look, whatever Malfoy did to me isn't your fault –'

'No, but what _I_ did to you was,' he said.

My heart pounded against my throat. 'You? You hurt me?'

He nodded again. I wished he would look at me, just once. I wanted to see what he was thinking.

I remembered what Remus had said about not accepting anyone's apology until I remembered what they had done to me. Was this what he was talking about?

My mouth felt dry; I licked my cracked lips so I could speak, but my voice still came out hoarse. 'What did you do?'

He sighed and closed his eyes as his head fell back against the wall. 'I can't tell you,' he said. 'I can't bring those memories back yet. It'll hit you too hard, and you might end up back where you started.'

There was pain in expression. Lots of pain. It hurt to see him like that.

He remained where he was, his eyes closed, and I seized my opportunity. The carpet was soft enough to stifle my footsteps. I crept forward, until I was right before him.

'Harry,' I whispered.

His brow creased, though he still didn't move. 'Don't,' he said.

But I did.

I reached up, taking from him what I had been craving from the beginning. My lips caressed his, just softly, not too forceful. I could feel his moan against my mouth. 'I can't,' he said as I drew away. His breaths were coming out faster now. 'I can't; you'll never forgive me –'

He opened his eyes, and I found myself lost in them. How could I not forgive him? I loved him – more than I had ever loved anyone. Whatever he'd done, it wasn't worth losing him for.

'Harry,' I said, nuzzling the side of his nose. 'We only have a few months before the prophecy comes true. A few months left together. After that… who knows what might happen?' I traced my fingers along his cheek. I could feel him trembling beneath me. 'What if I'm the one who dies?'

He reached up and took my hand. 'I'd never let that happen,' he said, his warm breaths brushing my lips.

I closed my eyes. 'But if I am, I'd want my last moments on earth to be with you.'

He kissed me; another soft, lingering kiss. My whole body was shaking. His hand was warm around mine, and he slipped his free arm around my waist to pull me closer.

'I can't do this,' he breathed against me.

I was terrified that he'd go. I pushed myself against him, trying to pin him to the wall. 'Yes you can,' I said. 'I don't care what you did to me before. I just want you now.'

He moaned again. 'You wouldn't be saying that if you remembered what happened.'

'Yes, I would. I _know_ I'd forgive you.'

Remus had warned me against exactly this, but I believed what I said with all my heart, and all my soul. Every piece of me longed for Harry.

I kissed him once more, this time deeper, this time more passionate. When he drew away, he was almost gasping. 'Do you promise?' he said through breaths. 'Do you promise you'll forgive me when you remember?'

'Yes.'

It was the only word I managed to get out before he was upon me.


	6. Recovery

**Chapter Six – Recovery**

He'd held me the way I wanted to be held. He'd kissed me the way I wanted to be kissed. He'd touched me the way I wanted to be touched.

And yet the craving remained unsatisfied. I couldn't get enough of him; couldn't stand to be away.

Hermione kept a close eye on me when I joined her in the dorm room, but as soon as everyone was asleep, Harry and I snuck back into the common room, unable to keep our hands off each other. It felt good – right – being with him. It was like true completion; he filled the place where darkness had once resided.

I fell asleep in his arms on the sofa by the fire. I was only half-aware of his fingers stroking my hair as I slipped into a safe unconsciousness. Dobby woke us early, before the others were up, and we slipped back to our separate beds with no one being the wiser.

Hermione studied me the next day as we made our way down to breakfast. 'How are you?'

I kept my face expressionless. 'Fine,' I said.

She glanced behind her, to see if they boys were following. When she was sure we were alone, she leaned closer. 'So? Are you going to tell me what happened after the meeting?'

I shrugged. 'I asked him if we'd slept together, he said yes, and that was it.'

Harry had begged me not to tell the others what had happened. He was under the impression that they'd make us stay apart until I recovered my memories. I remembered what Remus had said about not forgiving anyone yet, and I'd agreed to keep quiet about our relationship. I didn't want to be kept away from Harry. Not now, not when there was so little time for us left.

Remus found me while I was in the middle of my scrambled eggs. He glanced at Harry, who was sitting across from me. 'I want you two to come into my office right after breakfast.'

'What about class?' Harry said.

Remus shook his head. 'Professor Dumbledore says it's time to give up your timetable. We'll be training non-stop from now on.'

Harry's face paled, his eyes flicking to me. 'I keep forgetting how close my birthday is.'

Remus nodded towards me. 'Well don't worry. We have backup now. See you in half an hour.'

Ron and Hermione started chatting excitedly as soon as he'd left, discussing all the different things Harry would probably be practicing. Very quickly, the conversation turned to me, and all the spells I'd need to know. Harry and I continued with our breakfast, meeting eyes with the barest of smiles. At least we could be together.

My two dorm mates sauntered past, giggling as they glanced at me, but neither said anything aloud. I had a terrible feeling that they were responsible for my attack, but my memories continued to allude me.

When the hall emptied and students made their way to class, Harry and I wandered down the silent passageways. We walked side by side, brushing hands whenever we felt it was safe; whenever we were sure no one would see us. I loved being so near to him.

When we got to Remus's office, though, we had to stand apart, acting as distant to each other as before.

Remus was tidying his desk as we entered, but he gestured for us to take a seat. 'How are you both?' he said, waving his wand over a pile of parchments. The yellowing paper rolled itself up and floated through the air, slipping into a shelf behind him.

Even after living in a magical castle for several weeks, the action still startled me.

'We're fine,' Harry said.

Remus glanced over to me. 'Is everything okay between you two?' I nodded, and he seemed relieved. 'Good. It would have been problematic if you were uncomfortable working together after the… revelation… yesterday.'

'I've explained what she needs to know, and we've left it at that,' Harry said, and he sounded so cold, so unfeeling, that _I_ almost believed him.

'That's good enough for now,' Remus said. 'Come along, then – we're going to need a big place to practice.'

I recognised our journey as we headed up a multitude of staircases. 'We're going to the meeting room again?' I said.

'It won't be a meeting room today,' Remus said, leading the way through twists and turns.

I glanced quizzically at Harry. He smiled at me. 'It's actually the Room of Requirement. It can be whatever you want it to be.'

I raised an eyebrow. 'Really?'

A shadow of a smile flickered across his face, and he dropped his voice. 'We've used it before.'

I worked very hard to hold back a giggle. Who was this happy person I had become?

We reached the magic room, and I realised just what Remus and Harry had been talking about. Before, the place was the size of a large dining room, with nice carpet and rendered walls.

Now, however, the room was expansive, lined with slabs of stone. The place was much darker – wooden torches took the place of natural sunlight. There was a pile of cushions in the corner.

'Let's get straight to it, shall we?' Remus said, ushering us to the middle of the open space. 'Harry, give Emma your wand.'

I clung to the piece of wood like it was my last hope. 'What do I do with it?' I said.

'We'll start with the most important spell – _protego._ It's a shield charm, and hopefully will prove more than useful.'

Harry looked uncertain. 'That's a pretty advanced spell –'

'We don't have time for basics,' Remus said. 'She's got eleven years to catch up on, and only half a year to do it in. I'm going to teach her what she needs to know. Emma, hold out the wand.' He circled me, checking my stance, and adjusting my shoulders. 'The thing about magic is, each wizard has a unique way of casting spells. It takes a long time for the individual to discover his or her own style.'

'But she's supposedly copied my magic,' Harry said.

Remus grinned. 'Exactly. So Harry, you're basically going to have to teach her how to be you.'

xxx

Not long after I'd started my lessons, I woke up and knew exactly who the two girls in my room were. I remembered their names – Pansy and Millicent – and how they'd treated me last time I was in the castle. I didn't recall anything else about my past, but it was a start, and everyone seemed excited that I had gotten a piece of my memories back.

'This calls for a celebration,' Harry murmured on our way to Remus's office that morning.

He tugged my hand and led me into an empty classroom, locking the door with his wand. He swept me up, kissing and holding me how he had in the meeting room.

'Oh,' I gasped as I resurfaced for air, 'I love the way you celebrate.'

'And I love _you,_' he said against my neck.

I exhaled shakily, my fingers threading through his hair. 'I love you too,' I whispered. 'I know it's crazy, because I don't remember you, but –'

His mouth returned to mine, cutting me off. 'You don't need to explain,' he said.

We remained in the room for some time before Harry reluctantly mentioned that Remus would get suspicious if we took too long.

The sessions were intensive, and I found myself completely drained most of the time. I couldn't believe that a piece of wood could make things happen, but it did. I said some nonsense words, and a shield would arise, or the end would light up, or Harry would go flying across the room. I'd discovered the reason for the cushions soon enough, after that happened.

The words themselves were difficult to remember. I spent every night in the library speaking them aloud, writing them out, listening to them being said. They were all crazy Latin words – it helped if I researched the etymology behind them. Hermione helped out, when she wasn't looking up old prophecies. She hadn't had much luck deciphering any meanings so far, but she was still as enthusiastic as the day she'd had the idea.

When I needed a break from practice, Harry would use his wand to brush up on spells he'd already learnt. I could only watch in astonishment as he made a silver stag prance around the room, but when I tried the spell myself, nothing happened.

'That's a hard one,' Remus said when he saw my expression. 'You'll need a lot more control before you can hope to attempt a Patronus.'

When Remus had university classes to take, Harry and I would have lessons with Dumbledore, Severus, or Sirius. Dumbledore taught us some amazing duelling techniques – but these weren't the duels I was used to. They were fights using wands and magic. Spells were fired back and forth so quickly that I barely had time to catch what was going on. The more I watched he and Harry practice, the more frightened I felt. How could I reach that level by the end of July?

Lessons with Severus were less intimidating. I picked up Occlumency considerably easily, much to the surprise of both him and Harry. Severus seemed to think it was because of my psychic ability, but I still hadn't had any visions, so I wasn't entirely convinced.

Sirius spent a lot of his time teaching us what he liked to call "sneaky techniques" during duels, but was more commonly referred to as "cheating". I liked his style.

The rest of his lessons were just heart-to-hearts. He'd take us outside, and we'd wandering the freezing gardens, talking about life and what it all meant. A lot of the time, the conversation would remain lighthearted and jovial. But sometimes our discussions would get pretty deep, and it was during one of these times that I admitted to Harry that I was an orphan. It didn't surprise me that he hadn't known – I was obviously very closed-off last time I was in the castle. As soon as we were alone, Harry took me in his arms and held me. Just held me.

That day, I truly appreciated what it was like to have someone who understood.

Slowly, my memories returned. I remembered the castle, and going to classes, and my friendship with Hermione and Ron. I remembered the members of the Order, like Hagrid, and Minerva, and the Weasleys.

Recollections of events flashed through my mind, but they were jagged and indecipherable most of the time.

Jagged and indecipherable because, much to my dismay, any memory of Harry remained just out of reach, and apparently he was a big part of my life last time. It was incredibly frustrating. I would look at him, and I'd know my feelings were there. I'd know that I loved him more than anything. But I couldn't remember specifics; I didn't know what had happened between us.

Ron and Hermione were, at last, trying to be helpful. One night in February, while we were supposed to be studying in the library, they described the tension and the distrust between myself and Harry when I'd first arrived. Harry had thought I was a spy, and I had refused to cooperate while he acted so cold towards me.

'Sounds intense,' I said.

Hermione nodded. 'It was. But then…' She frowned. 'Things began to change.'

'How so?'

Ron and Hermione exchanged glances. 'We don't know exactly what happened,' Ron said. He hesitated. 'Are you okay, hearing all this? I mean, it must be weird, considering you and Harry aren't seeing each other anymore.'

That's what he thought.

I shrugged. 'It's fine. Hit me.'

'You two were very secretive,' Hermione said. 'I'm not sure what changed –'

'The lake.'

We turned as Harry joined us, taking a seat at our table across from me. Hermione stared at him. 'The lake?'

He nodded, turning his attention to me. 'It all happened at the lake. I kissed you, told you I loved you, and changed everything.'

'Wait – _that_ was the Danger?' Ron said. 'You guys falling in love?'

'Danger?' I said. 'What danger?'

'You'd scared us all with this dire warning that some terrible Danger was coming,' Hermione explained. She sat back in her chair, looking grim. 'I guess the Danger was just love.'

I was confused. 'Why is that dangerous?'

'Because if Voldermort can force Harry to give up his wand, it's all over. And if Harry loves you enough, any threat to your safety will be incentive enough for him to surrender.'

I blinked, my poor brain trying to sort out this new information. 'That… that doesn't sound very good.'

Harry brushed his leg against mine under the table. 'It's okay,' he said. 'We won't let anything happen to you to begin with.'

His voice must have come across too tender, because both Ron and Hermione shot him a look.

I sunk down in my chair, still feeling as lost as I did on the first day. 'Why don't I remember Harry?' I said with a sigh.

Hermione placed her hand on mine. 'You will. There's… a lot attached to your memory of Harry. Just give it time.'

Harry met my eyes. 'It's getting late.'

I recognised the meaningful expression on his face, and even though it was still pretty early, I nodded. 'You're right. I should probably head upstairs.'

Hermione half-rose from her chair. 'Do you want us to come?' She glanced over at another study table, where Millicent and Pansy were both watching us intently.

Harry took out his wand and rolled it across the table to me. I picked it up and shook my head at Hermione. 'I can look after myself now. Thanks anyway.'

I slipped out of the library, keeping my hand wrapped tightly around Harry's wand. Instead of heading to my dorm, however, I headed up to the seventh floor, to the Room of Requirement. I had only just reached the top of the last staircase when Harry joined me. He gave me a half smile and drew me close, bestowing me with a lingering kiss.

'Happy Valentine's Day,' he said in my ear.

I shivered as his breath touched the hairs on the back of my neck. I leaned up, kissing just beneath his jaw. 'You too,' I whispered. 'I didn't even realise what the date was.'

He led me to the Room of Requirement, his arm still firmly around my waist, despite the risk. When he opened the door this time, the place was a bedroom, lit with sweet-scented candles. Rose petals were scattered across the big red quilt, and a fireplace crackled softly in the corner.

'Impressive,' I said.

He closed the door behind us. 'This is where we were the first time we…' He trailed off, but I was surprised to see a pained look on his face.

I grimaced. 'That bad, huh?'

He shook his head to clear the expression. 'No, no – it wasn't that. It was what happened after. When you were… hurt.'

'Oh,' I said. I stepped towards the door, a teasing smile on my face. 'Well maybe we shouldn't do this, then.'

He growled playfully and snatched my wrist. 'You're not going anywhere.'

xxx

Hermione took my arm and walked me around the gardens. 'You need to get outside more, Emma,' she said. 'You're not get enough fresh air.'

'It's freezing out here,' I grumbled, glad at least that I was still wearing Harry's jacket.

'I know, but it can't be good for you, sitting around the castle all day.' She lifted her face to the sun, although it felt even colder with the clear skies. 'So how are you going?' she said after a silence.

'Going?' I said.

'Yes. About… well… you and Harry. How are things between you?'

I shrugged, trying to remain casual. 'Fine.'

'It's not weird?' She studied my reaction, then continued. 'I'm asking because you two have been acting very strange recently.'

'Strange? How?' My voice rose a pitch.

'Like how you used to act when you were hiding your relationship from us last time.' When I didn't say anything, Hermione pursed her lips in disapproval. 'Believe me, I want you and Harry to get together more than anyone. It's just…'

'What he did to me?' I said.

She nodded. 'It was… messy. _You_ were messy.' She sighed. 'I just don't think you're going to be very happy with him when you get your memories back.'

I squeezed her arm. 'I love him,' I said. 'I want to spend every last precious moment being with him. Whatever he did, I know he's sorry, and that's enough.'

'I hope so,' Hermione mumbled.

'You saw him when he was feeling guilty all the time,' I said. 'He couldn't even look at me. You don't want him to suffer like that any more, do you?'

Hermione seemed torn. 'No, of course not. Only… it would be horrible if you forgave him then took it back later.'

'I won't take it back,' I said firmly.

'So… is something going on between you and Harry?'

'If there is, would you tell anyone?'

Hermione looked away. 'No,' she said quietly. 'I guess not.' She slowed, steering us away from the greenhouses. I remembered that she had also avoided them during her tour on my second day in the castle.

'What's over there that's so terrible?' I said.

She grimaced. 'I guess I'm not as subtle as I'd hoped.' I waited for an answer, and she sighed. 'Let's not get into it. I don't want to jolt your memories. You're doing fine by taking it all slow.'

'Slow shmow,' I muttered beneath my breath, but I didn't push it any further.

We returned back into the castle just as Remus hurried up to us. 'There you two are! I've been looking all over for you!'

'Is everything okay?' Hermione said.

'Yes, absolutely. I have this theory, and I'd like to test it.' He led us swiftly through the castle, towards his office. Hermione and I almost had to jog to keep up.

'What kind of theory?' I said.

'Well,' Remus said over his shoulder, 'I've been thinking about your duplication of Harry's magic. What would happen if we combined it? Had you and Harry do a spell _together_?'

Hermione gasped. 'Do you think they can?'

'Of course,' Remus said. 'Think how powerful they'd be. Normally, combined magic doesn't work very well because no two wizard's magic are the same, but seeing they're identical –'

'That's brilliant!' Hermione said. 'Imagine someone as powerful as Harry doubling his magic!'

I was feeling a little under pressure here. 'Don't get too enthusiastic about this,' I said. 'I'm still a beginner with magic.'

'Not when it comes to the shield charm,' Remus said as we reached his office. 'And that's the one that's most important.'

He opened his door to reveal a strange man waiting in his chair. The first thing I noticed was that one of the man's eyes was fake, electric blue, and swivelled frighteningly in its socket. Then I started to notice other things; quite horrifying things. For starters, most of the man's nose was missing. And there were scars across his face. And it looked like his ears were out of shape.

Remus beamed at me. 'I've asked Alastor Moody to come in especially for this.'

Hermione leaned closer. 'He's a specialist dark wizard catcher,' she whispered. 'He's part of the Order, but he's always on top secret assignments, so he barely ever comes to meetings.'

I nodded, unable to take my eyes off the fearful man.

Alastor Moody got out of his chair and limped over to us. 'Are you sure she's ready, Remus?' he said in a low, rumbly voice, his strange blue eye scrutinising me.

I remembered quite suddenly that we'd met before, and he had been under the impression that my being the key was a mistake.

I shrunk under his disapproving glare.

'Absolutely,' Remus said.

'We're here,' Ron said, as he and Harry entered the room.

Remus turned to them. 'Good.' With a wave of his wand, he moved his desk to the side of the room and closed the door. 'All right, we're going to start off with something strong. I know it's a little unconventional, but time is running out.' I didn't like the sound of that. Remus paused dramatically. 'Alastor is going to perform the Torture Curse.'

'No way,' Harry said automatically, lunging forward and grabbing my hand.

'If we've found a way for you to protect yourself from that, then it's more than likely to work against the Killing Curse, too,' Remus said.

Harry shrugged. 'I don't need protection from that.'

'Emma does,' Remus said, and from Harry's face I could tell that was a blow below the belt.

'And you might need it later if you ever give up your wand,' Hermione added.

Harry hesitated, then shook his head resolvedly. 'If it doesn't work –'

'If you're worried about Emma, stand in front of her,' Remus said. 'Besides, I really think this is going to work.'

'If it does actually work, won't it rebound into Alastor?' Hermione said.

'I'm faster than I look, missy,' Alastor Moody said with a growl.

Remus gestured for Hermione and Ron to move against the wall. 'Stand back, you two.'

'I didn't agree to anything yet,' Harry said in alarm. His hand tightened around mine.

'It's too late,' Remus said. 'Alastor's going to be using the curse on my count of five, so you'd better be ready. One!'

Hermione and Ron rushed backwards, as far away from us as possible. Remus continued to count as Harry took a spot in front of me and raised his wand. I reached out from behind him, covering his hand with mine.

'Remember the spell?' Harry said as Remus said 'Four!'

'Of course I do,' I said, gritting my teeth to stop the panicky bile rising in my throat.

'Five!'

'_Crucio!_'

'_Protego!_'

I shut my eyes, waiting to be thrown backwards, waiting to feel Harry's weight upon me. Light illuminated the back of my eyelids. Several moments passed where nothing happened, and I dared to peek.

A silver shield stretched between us and Alastor, who was now standing to one side. Hermione and Ron were gaping at us in amazement, and Remus began laughing like a man gone mad. The shield disappeared as I dropped my hand, and my forehead fell against Harry's back. 'Oh, thank god,' I moaned. 'Remus, you're insane.'

'That was fantastic!' Remus yelled, ignoring me. '_No one's_ been able to deflect the Torture Curse before! Wait 'til I tell Professor Dumbledore!'

Ron got over his astonishment first and joined the laughter. 'That was crazy!'

Hermione managed a nervous giggle, and even Alastor Moody looked pleased. I was still not amused, and gave Harry a dark glare when he congratulated Remus after finally recovering from the shock.

'Come on, Emma,' he grinned. 'You've got to admit, that was pretty cool.'

xxx

'Seamus.'

The name hit me in the middle of an Occlumency lesson, and I jolted in my chair.

Severus stopped his assault on my mind and stared at me. I saw Harry, who was sitting in the corner of the room, sit up in his chair from the corner of my eye.

I frowned, trying to remember who Seamus was. It was strange – I had a similar feeling towards this mystery boy as I did towards my coworker, Simon.

I glanced over at Harry. 'Who was Seamus?' I said.

He looked away.

'Seamus was your boyfriend,' Severus said in his drawling voice.

I spun to him in astonishment. 'What? But… but… wasn't Harry my boyfriend?'

'Not officially,' Severus said. He sat back in his chair and clasped his hands together. 'It was – and remains to be – much too dangerous for him to show any affection towards you in public.'

'So I dated a boy called Seamus?' I said incredulously. 'Was he a decoy or something?'

'No.' Harry's quiet reply was filled with pain. 'You genuinely liked him, and he was good to you during times when I… wasn't so pleasant.'

I swung my attention between him and Severus. 'Is he still a student here?' I said. 'I don't remember seeing him.'

A thick silence settled across the room. Severus studied me for a few long minutes before replying. 'Seamus passed away last term.'

My stomach plummeted. That explained why I had linked him and Simon in my mind. 'That's horrible,' I breathed. 'What happened?'

'Not yet,' Harry said.

Severus straightened. 'We cannot discuss this topic at the present time,' he said. 'I suppose you will have to wait. Let us concentrate on the task at hand.'

But when he attacked my mind again, trying to get in, I had another flash and was unable to stop him.

Seamus was a cute boy – brown hair and freckles. I saw him smiling at me from across the table; brushing his hand against mine; giving me hesitant and clumsy kisses –

And, for the first time, I remembered Harry. The way his eyes flashed with anger whenever I talked about Seamus, and how we always fought over the topic…

I blinked dazedly, coming out of the stupor. Harry and Severus were standing over me; I had fallen to the floor. The back of my head was throbbing from the cold stone beneath me.

'Are you okay?' Harry said.

I stared up at him. 'You were jealous of Seamus.'

Harry flinched at Severus's stare, but he answered my question. 'Yes, I was. Of course I was. He took you away from me.' He paused. 'But he didn't deserve to die.'

I sat up, and Harry offered his hand to help me to my feet.

'You remember Harry?' Severus said as I rose.

I rubbed my head. 'Only those few flashes I had. But at least it's something.'

Severus turned his dark eyes to Harry. 'It shouldn't be long now.'

The colour seemed to leave Harry's face. 'I know,' he said quietly.

I reached out and ran my fingers down his arm. 'I've forgiven you, remember?'

Severus cleared his throat, causing me and Harry to jump apart from each other. He swung his cold stare between the two of us. 'I trust that nothing is going on between you two as of yet.'

'No,' Harry and I said together, probably too quickly.

Severus looked unconvinced, but he changed the subject. 'Sit down, Emma. We shall continue with your Occlumency.'

'Why is it so vital that I learn this, anyway?' I said, sliding back into my chair. 'If Malfoy already knows that Harry's in love with me, then surely he's told Voldermort.'

'That's not the issue,' Severus said. 'The problem is that Malfoy's information could result in a repeat incident as what happened with Cho.'

I saw Harry tense in his chair. His knuckles went white from clutching the wooden arms so tightly. My throat constricted in anticipation, but I asked the question anyway. 'Who's Cho?'

Harry answered. 'She was my girlfriend,' he said, his voice hoarse.

'Voldermort tortured her to death, thinking Harry would give up his wand to stop her pain,' Severus said, showing no trace of emotion. 'In the end, he wasted his time and energy – Harry did not surrender, and he managed to escape in the process.'

I was unable to help myself – I was appalled. Harry quickly interjected before I could speak. 'It's not like it sounds,' he said, strained. 'It almost killed me to watch Cho in pain. I still have nightmares about it. I just…'

'He kept the bigger picture in mind,' Severus said when Harry trailed off. 'He forced himself to remember that the entire world was at stake. If he was to give up his wand, the magic protecting him would crumble, and Voldermort would be able to kill him. If that were to happen, there would be nothing stopping Voldermort from taking over the wizarding world – and the muggle one.'

I was starting to feel physically ill. 'So if Voldermort manages to get me, I'm going to be tortured to death?'

'No.' Harry's moan was muffled – he had his face in his hands. He drew in a ragged breath and raised his head. 'No,' he said again. He sounded resigned. 'If Voldermort ever captured you, I'd surrender in a second. To hell with the rest of the world.'

A warm shiver rippled through my body. I felt as though I was literally glowing.

But I kept my mouth shut, and my face expressionless.

'I've tried to reason with him,' Severus said. 'It seems people are frustratingly stubborn when they're in love.'

'That's the information Voldermort needs,' Harry murmured. 'That's what Malfoy can't provide him with.'

'And that,' Severus said, 'is why you must learn Occlumency.'


	7. Chocolate Cake

This chapter is coming to you early thanks to Sailor Em.

**Chapter Seven – Chocolate Cake**

I stared down at my plate, not really seeing it. My fork hung above a roast potato, but it didn't descend. My mind was much further away than dinner.

'What's up?' Ron said, a mouth full of beef. A bit of gravy dribbled down his chin.

Hermione gave him a disgusted look and handed him a napkin.

I shrugged, using my fork to stir my peas. 'Just thinking.'

Harry sat across from me; he brushed my leg with his beneath the table. 'Still stuck on this afternoon?'

I hesitated, then gave a resigned nod. 'It's… a lot to take in.'

Ron looked from Harry to me. 'What happened this afternoon?'

'Snape told her about Cho,' Harry said.

Ron and Hermione exchanged glances. 'Harry… Harry had no choice,' Hermione said.

'I don't blame him,' I said quickly. 'I don't… I don't blame anyone.' I stopped. 'Well, I certainly blame Voldermort. But that's not the point. It's just… the whole thing sucks.' I dropped my fork on my plate. It clattered, but the noise was lost in the chatter of the Great Hall.

'Check it out,' Ron muttered. 'Pansy's looking mighty sour about something.'

We all turned to my dark-haired dorm mate, who was shooting me venomous glares over her dinner. I raised my eyebrows. 'What's her problem this time?'

'If I found out she was the one who used the Confundus Curse on you, she's got hell to pay,' Harry said beneath his breath.

I reached for a glass of water, but images flashed across my mind like they had that afternoon, and I jolted, knocking over my goblet. Water spilled across the table, blurring the divide between what was happening then, and my incoming of memories.

Remus was before me – shouting; furious. The words echoed in my head, pounding against my skull…

'_You were the goddam _key_! All the training, all the sacrifices have been wasted! We can't win this war anymore! All because you couldn't keep your goddam hands to yourself!'_

I felt panic and betrayal rise up, like it had before. It was real and raw, as though it was happening all over again.

I moaned. 'Harry…'

'Emma, it's okay. What did you see? Was it a vision?'

The world returned as Hermione spoke to me, stroking my hair to calm my shivers. Ron and Harry were staring, horror-struck, from across the table. I glanced around; a lot of people had turned to me.

'Remus,' I said between gasps. 'Remus… why was he angry at me? What did I do?'

Harry relaxed. 'It was a memory,' he said, his voice soothing. He reached out and covered my hand with his own. 'He was furious because Seamus had exposed our relationship. It wasn't your fault, but he took it out on you –'

I remembered my conversation with Remus a few weeks earlier. He had apologised, but I hadn't understood what he had been apologising for until now.

'He was so mean,' I rasped.

Hermione gave me her goblet of water, and I took a sip to ease my tight throat.

'A lot of terrible things happened that night,' Harry said, casting a glance over to the front table, where the professors dined.

Many had their eyes my way, including Remus. When he met Harry's eye, he got up and headed over to us.

I sunk lower on the bench, wishing I wouldn't have to deal with the confrontation. I had liked Remus very much until several seconds ago. Hermione shifted over, and Remus took a spot beside me.

'You remember,' he said.

I nodded, unable to look at him.

He placed a hand on my shoulder. 'Emma, I'm so sorry. It was a mistake, a dreadful mistake, and you have no idea how much it ate away at me after you were hurt.'

My eyes darted over the table to Harry, whose attention was fixed on his half-finished meal. I realised the significance of the moment. If I forgave Remus now, after what he had done, I could prove that I was ready to let go of everything else that had been done to me. I could prove to Harry that I would definitely forgive him, when the time came.

I turned to Remus, soaking in the regret and pain in his expression. He was sorry; truly sorry. And he had always been so kind to me. He was just a man who had lost his good judgement for one irrational moment.

I could forgive that.

I smiled at him. 'That's okay,' I said. 'You were upset, and things were pretty rough at that time, so I hear.'

A hint of relief crossed Remus's face. 'Are you sure?'

I nodded, now firm in my resolve. 'Absolutely.' I shifted forward and embraced him. 'Don't stress about it anymore, okay?'

When he left the table, he looked a lot better, like a weight had been lifted from his shoulders. It felt good to be the cause of that.

'See?' I said to Harry. 'What happened, happened. We have enough to deal with in the future to be holding on to past mistakes.'

Harry looked somewhat pacified. I finally found my appetite, and managed to finish my meal. We were all pleased when Pansy got up before the end of dinner and stalked out of the hall. I was feeling uncomfortable with her glare burning into my back.

To make things even better, there was chocolate cake for dessert. Single plates for each of us appeared, uniquely decorated and covered in icing.

'Wow, the house elves went all out tonight,' Ron said, digging into his.

I finished mine before everyone else, and when they all gave me amused looks, I shrugged. 'Blame Pip – er – Tonks. I never had a sweet tooth before she came along.'

'Chocolate is a good way to beat dementor blues,' Ron said.

I stopped, halfway though scraping my plate with my dessert fork. 'Dementor?'

Ron shut his mouth and shot an alarmed glance at Harry. 'Should I have said that?'

'I don't know,' Harry said, watching me carefully. 'Emma, does that word mean anything to you?'

I frowned. At first, the name had sounded foreign. But as I thought about it, an image formed in my mind. Dark, floating, cloaked creatures…

And pain.

Lots of pain.

'We've fought them before, haven't we?' I said, struggling to remember. It was like trying to hold on to a fading dream. 'Down at the Quiddich pitch.'

Relief flickered across Harry's expression. 'Yes. That's right.'

'But…' I said, causing Harry to tense again, 'but there was more.' I put my fork down and pinched the bridge of my nose. 'Ah, it's at the brink of my mind…' I sighed after a moment and shook my head. 'Nope, I can't remember.'

Hermione, Harry, and Ron all seemed to breathe sighs of relief. I wasn't sure why.

I licked the remainder of the cake from my fork, deciding to let their reaction go and concentrate on my last mouthful instead. Chocolate always had a way of making me feel better.

xxx

I was burning. My blood, my skin, my muscles – they all scorched. The pain had woken me from a restless sleep, and I couldn't relax. I may as well have been on fire. I lay in bed, tossing and turning, my sweat coating the sheets. I threw off my blanket, but it did nothing to soothe the heat.

My mouth was watering. I wasn't even sure what I wanted, but I knew I wanted _something_. My stomach was aching to the point where I curled up, unable to move.

I tried to call out for Hermione, but my tongue was too parched. It was late, too – she wouldn't be checking in on me until morning.

And then, like a miracle, I heard a gentle knocking on the wall by my bed. She had known, somehow. She would save me from the pain.

But when the curtain drew back, I was horrified to find that it wasn't Hermione.

Pansy's silhouette stood in the moonlight. She stepped in, closing the hangings behind her and tying the rope up, so the place was soundproofed.

'Having some trouble there?' she said, settling herself on the bed beside my legs. I kicked out at her, and she jumped up with a laugh. 'Feisty feisty. No wonder you're Harry's type. He always goes for the ones who gets themselves killed.'

I fought to unglue my tongue from the roof of my mouth. 'What… have you done… to me?' I hissed.

'Black Beetle Additive,' Pansy said. 'The strongest addictive substance in the world.'

I moaned. 'Hermione!'

Pansy snorted. 'You know she can't hear you.'

I squirmed in my bed, clutching my shirt to try to ease the pain. 'How… do you… make it… stop?'

Pansy smirked. 'More chocolate cake.'

Cake. I slid out of bed, landing on the stone floor with a thump. My body had found some strength – I must have more cake. My entire life had become about getting another slice.

I used the bed for support as I climbed to my feet.

'Where do you think you're going?' Pansy said with a laugh.

I spoke through my teeth. 'Kitchens.'

'Oh, no. There's no more in the kitchens.'

Despair welled up inside me. I had to have another slice. I would die without more. I felt like I was crumbling internally. 'Where…?' I croaked.

Pansy pointed in the direction of the window. 'There's more behind Hagrid's hut. In the dark forest.'

I staggered towards my hangings.

'You won't want to wake anyone up,' Pansy said.

I threw her a glare over my shoulder. 'Of course I do.'

'No, you don't. If tell anyone, they'll never let you get another slice of cake.' Even the thought had me doubling over, clinging to my stomach. Pansy chuckled. 'You'd better move quietly.'

I untied the rope and dragged the curtains back, almost falling over in the process. Each step was like agony. I didn't know how much time I had left, but it couldn't be much. Without cake, I would die.

The journey downstairs was excruciating. I had no idea whether I'd make it or not. I ran into the little house elf, Dobby, in the common room. He tried to stop me, but I hit him out of the way and stumbled onwards. I couldn't afford to be hindered.

One step after another. It was the only way to stay alive. Just one step after another.

I could feel pieces of myself falling away inside. I was dying; I knew it. One more slice would make it okay again – just one more slice. Tears slid down my face, though I hardly let that stop me. A blurry vision didn't mean anything. I could practically feel my way to the cake. Halfway down to the ground floor I began trembling uncontrollably. I clung to the wall, ignoring the portraits as they called out to me.

One step after another.

The front door to the castle was closed, but I went around the back and slipped out to the verandas. It was freezing outside. No snow, just icy air. I barely noticed as it bit at my bare feet and arms. I was still burning.

One step after another.

I lurched towards the greenhouses, grinding my teeth to keep the pain in check. I was close now, very close.

'EMMA!'

My body seized up in panic. Harry was following. I tried to walk faster, keeping my eyes forward, but I could hear him running after me.

'No…' I choked, my tears still streaming. 'Please don't stop me. Please. I'm going to die without it.'

'Emma, stop, you can't leave the grounds!' He caught up and spun me around. His eyes widened at my tears. 'What's wrong with you? Dobby said you almost pushed him into the fireplace.'

Dobby. Hatred surged within me. That little snitch was going to die. I curled my fingers, wishing I could strange the tattle tale.

'Just let me go,' I said, breathing through my teeth. 'I know what I'm doing.'

Harry raised his eyebrows. 'It certainly doesn't look like it.' He glanced in the direction I was heading. 'Where are you going, anyway?'

I kept my mouth firmly clamped shut. He couldn't know – he'd never let me go.

I noticed he had his wand, and held out a shaking hand. 'I'll be fine,' I said. Every word was an effort to get out. Every passing moment was drawing me closer to death. 'Just give me your wand. I can take care of myself.'

'I don't think so,' Harry said dryly. 'Tell me what happened. Why are you out here?'

Frustration increased my tears. 'Just go away.'

Harry's fingers trailed down the sides of my face. 'Talk to me,' he whispered. 'Tell me what's wrong.'

Sobs ripped through my chest. 'Leave me alone. Please, god, leave me alone.'

He drew me into his embrace, cradling my head to the crook of his neck. 'It's not safe for you out here. Look at you, you're trembling. Come back inside, by the fire, and we'll talk.'

The desperation was clawing at my lungs, making it almost impossible to breathe. I pushed Harry away as hard as I could, and scrambled to think of a way to get him to leave.

'Get Hermione!' I cried. 'I need Hermione. Trust me!'

Harry hesitated, looking torn. 'I'm not letting you stay out here alone.'

'Please!' I was screaming by now. 'Please, get Hermione! And the rest of the Order! Go!'

Harry spun, pointing his wand to the castle. _'Expecto Patronum!'_

His silver stag raced into the castle like a streak of light. I moaned, dragging my hands down my face. I had forgotten that there were magical means to gather his friends.

I turned, hoping to catch him off-guard, and forced my legs to sprint past the greenhouses. Harry was much too quick for me – he must have done a spell, because it felt as though my feet hit something, even though there was only air, and I tripped, smashing to the ground. I lay there, helpless, dying.

'Please… let… me… go…'

He rolled me over, gripping my shoulders to pin me down. 'What's going on with you?' he said.

'I'm dying!' I sobbed, struggling against him. 'I'm dying. Please let me go. Please let me go.' I said the words over and over again, until my mouth was aching. But it was nothing compared to the burning, or the feeling of my insides collapsing. It was too late. I was going to die.

Severus was the first one to reach us. 'What's going on?' he said.

Harry kept his grip on me. 'I don't know! She keeps saying she's dying.'

'I am,' I said through tears. 'Severus, please. Pansy's poisoned me with Black Beetle Additive – you know I'm going to die without more.'

Harry frowned. 'Why does that sound familiar?'

'We did it in potions,' Severus said grimly. 'First class of the year. I must get the antidote immediately.'

'No!' I shrieked. 'No antidote! I just need more, Harry, please let me get more.'

'Where would you get more?' Severus said.

I was gasping, desperate for air. 'The dark forest. Just past Hagrid's hut. You'll let me go, won't you? You won't let me die, right?'

'It's just the effects of the additive,' Severus said. 'You're not actually going to die.'

I lay back, sobbing in resignation. He didn't understand; neither of them understood. I was definitely dying. Why couldn't they see that?

'Wait here,' Severus said to Harry. 'I'll be back as soon as I've gotten the antidote. Don't let her out of your care.'

Harry shook his head. 'I won't.'

Severus hastened back into the castle. I struggled harder against Harry's grip. 'God, Harry, if you love me –'

'I do love you,' Harry said, clutching my shoulders tighter. 'And I won't let anything happen to you. I promise you'll be fine in a few minutes. Can you wait a few minutes?'

'No!' I cried. 'No, I'm going to die _now_. Please, please…'

'Emma –'

'My whole body's collapsing. I can feel it. You need to get me more cake. I'm begging you…' I curled my legs up and kicked out as hard as I could, throwing Harry off me. He fell backwards and landed on the pavement. I seized my chance. My legs were almost trembling too much to work properly, but somehow I managed to stumble around the greenhouses.

A spell hit me from behind. I slammed hard into the steps of a nearby gazebo, knocking the wind from my lungs. I lay still, fighting to get my breath back. The place seemed familiar; it sparked a memory somewhere deep inside.

Seamus…

Malfoy…

The knife…

Harry.

I gasped as flash after flash blinded my vision. I tried to scream, but nothing came out. The same thing had happened on the night – Malfoy had put a silencing charm on me. Had made me invisible. Had forced me to watch.

His body twisted and bubbled into someone else – me. He had used a potion to look like me.

'No…' I moaned.

'EMMA!'

Harry's voice was screaming in my ear, but I was lost in a sea of memories.

I moved in and out between worlds, between times. One second I was burning with pain from the addiction, the next I was watching Malfoy as Polyjuice-me stabbing Seamus.

He had tormented Harry, telling him I was a spy. He had framed me.

And Harry had believed him.

Someone held my head still in the present. I felt something disgusting ooze down my throat. I gagged, close to vomiting, but Severus's gnarled hand clutched my jaw, forcing me to keep the vile potion down.

My body shuddered as a new image washed through me. I jerked right out of Severus's grip as I felt Harry suddenly kick me in the mouth, then again, and again. It was only a memory, but every blow felt real and agonising.

Harry had believed I was the enemy. Harry had hurt me.

I gasped for air, returning to the present. 'Harry –' I panted. He was cradling me to his chest.

'I'm here,' he said. 'I'm right here, please remember that I love you, please don't –'

But his voice vanished as the memories kept coming. I felt the slash across my torso and the pain from other attacks. I couldn't believe Harry could hurt me so badly.

I remembered begging for him to listen. For him to give me a chance to explain.

And then I watched, unable to believe it, as Harry pointed his wand at me, his face warped in malice. _'Crucio.'_

I screamed, both in my memories and the present. I remembered the pain, as clear as if it was happening right now. It was unbearable.

He had used the Torture Curse on me.

xxx

The rest of the visions came fast after that. There was blackness and pain and torment. I felt the grip of darkness in my mind, and groaned in agony. I was sinking into insanity, reliving the moment over and over again.

Harry had had me sent to prison, to face the dementors. Harry was the reason for my depression. Harry had inflicted cruelty worse than death upon me.

Voices echoed in my head.

'Are we losing her again?'

'Someone do something, stop the memories!'

'No one can stop it, Hermione!'

'Don't let her go, Remus, don't let her leave me, please, please –'

'We'll save her, Harry, I promise, just keep your grip on her –'

'She stopped screaming… is she alright?'

'Emma? Emma, answer me. Emma?'

I slowly opened my eyes as Harry's voice came sharply through the fog of noise. The air was biting at my exposed skin; the burning of the addiction was gone. It was dark out by the gazebo, but someone was holding a lantern. There were figures all standing around. All staring. Remus, Dumbledore, Severus, Sirius, Hermione, Ron… and Harry.

Harry was holding me.

'Is she okay?' Hermione said.

My brain finally started up again, and I inhaled sharply. People crowded in; I could see their faces in the light of the lantern. They looked distraught. Harry touched my face.

'Emma?'

I instinctively pushed away his hand. 'Don't touch me.'

Harry's breath caught in his chest. 'Emma, I –'

'You,' I spat, shoving him away and staggering to my feet. 'You used the _Torture Curse_ on me!'

Harry stood slowly, shakily. 'Please listen –'

'WHY?' I screamed. 'Why do you deserve to be listened to, when every time I tried to talk, you tortured me? And if that wasn't bad enough, you sent me to prison to face the _dementors_!'

'I know, I'm sorry –'

'You're sorry?' I said with a partly-hysterical laugh. '_Sorry_? You certainly didn't seem sorry when we were sleeping together all this time!'

The professors all winced, but no one interrupted.

'I tried to stay away from you,' Harry said, his voice pleading.

'You should have tried harder!' I screeched.

'Emma,' Hermione said quietly. 'You promised to forgive him, remember?'

'That was before I knew what he'd done!' My voice was coming out high and shrill. I laughed again. 'God, I thought he'd said something mean, or cheated on me. I never expected…' I trailed off, swiping tears of revulsion from my cheeks and scowling at Harry. 'You can forget about us. There _is_ no us. It's over.'

Hermione stepped forward. 'What about what you said? You told me that you wanted to spend every last precious moment with him. You didn't want him to suffer.'

'Oh, he deserves to suffer,' I said lowly. 'And I want to spend every last precious moment _away_ from him.' The words were coated in hatred. Harry cringed, but it was hardly enough to satiate my hunger for justice.

'Let's just sleep on it,' Sirius said. He sounded nervous. 'I'm sure everything will seem better in the morning.' He held out his arm to lead me back into the castle. 'Let's get you back to bed, Emma.'

But I twisted away. 'No. I'm not going with you. Any of you.' I glared at the group before me. 'Harry put me through hell. I lost my mind because of him. And you still _protect_ that monster.'

Dumbledore finally stepped in. 'Emma, you must come back into the castle.'

'Or what?' I said with a snarl. 'I'll die? Too late, professor, my death date's already been set.'

'Don't lean too heavily on the prophecy,' Dumbledore said with infuriating patience.

'Have you come up with another answer?' I demanded. 'Well? Have you?' He didn't reply.

'Emma, _please_,' Hermione said. Her eyes shimmered with tears. 'Why are you being so awful to us?'

'Because I was innocent!' I screamed. I covered my eyes and broke down. No one came to comfort me. I sunk to the ground, my legs unable to take anymore. My whole body shivered from the cold.

'I hadn't done anything wrong,' I said through sobs. 'I came here and tried to help Harry, and he abused me - I remember. I fell in love with him, and he dumped me. I don't care if he was doing it to protect me – he broke my heart.' I hugged my knees and buried my head in my arms, not caring whether the others could still hear me. 'I spent months protecting him from harm, and all he ever did was hurt me. And that night... he – he didn't even give me a chance to explain. I was framed. I never did anything wrong… ever… ever…'

I couldn't speak any more. I'd been through enough. The depression had set in again, now that my memories of the dementors had returned.

I wished I was back home. I wished I was living my dreary, pointless life. I wished the prophecies had never been made.

And I wished, more than anything, that I had never met Harry Potter.

There was a long silence, broken only by my sobs.

'Okay,' said Remus after a time. 'We will deal with this. But first, Emma, please come inside. Your hands and feet are turning blue.'

'I'm not going inside,' I said into my knees.

'You're not staying out here,' Sirius said firmly.

'I don't want anything to do with you,' I snapped.

'Well where else are you going to go?'

I lifted my head and glanced down the hill, towards the little hut by the forest. 'I'll sleep at Hagrid's tonight. And then tomorrow, we can discuss me going home.'

No one argued.

I tried to get up, but my body was stiff and frozen from the cold. Remus noticed my predicament and grabbed me beneath my arms, hauling me up. I stumbled – my legs were barely mobile. I couldn't walk.

Remus sighed and scooped me up, princess-style. 'I'll take you down to Hagrid, and we'll fix you up by the fire.' I opened my mouth, but he cut me off. 'Don't argue. You don't even have the strength to stand on your own.' He glanced back at the others. 'I'll meet you back inside after.'

I didn't look back. There was no reason to bother. Those people were all protecting Harry, first and foremost. They didn't care about what happened to me.

'Oh, Emma,' Remus sighed as he carried me down the hill. 'What a night. It was almost as bad as last time.'

I didn't answer. I was exhausted – from the crying, from the onslaught of memories, from the broken heart. I didn't know how I was going to make it through to morning.

I rested my head against Remus's shoulder, staring blankly at the view before me. The trees were dark and foreboding. A chill seemed to emanate from within the forest itself. I shivered unconsciously. Remus tightened his grip on me. 'We're almost there.'

'Remus…' I whispered.

'We'll talk by the fire.'

'No… Remus. The cake.'

Remus slowed. My breaths came out as mist around me. 'The cake,' I said again. 'Pansy said I was supposed to go into the dark forest. There's a trap for me… right here.'

Remus stopped short. 'I'd forgotten all about it,' he said. He sounded panicked. He started lowering my legs.

'What are you doing?' I said.

'I need my wand. You have to run back up the hill.'

'No – Remus, no! I don't have any energy left –'

But Remus put me down and grabbed his wand from his inner jacket pocket, pointing it towards the forest. My feet stung, like they were standing on flames. I crumbled to the ground.

'Stand up!' Remus yelled.

I used my hands, trying desperately to get up, but I felt too weak. Too drained. Too helpless.

The reason became clear enough.

Black figures drifted out from the forest, heading towards us. Wind whistled around my body, paralysing me.

'Remus!'

'_Expecto Patronum!'_

His patronus warmed me slightly, streaking around the dementors. But they came in swarms – he had no chance of defeating them.

'Emma, please run!'

I couldn't. I sunk to the ground, frozen, useless. I no longer had Harry. I no longer had my friends. There was no point fighting anymore.

'Emma, GET UP!'

Remus was still warding off the dementors with fierce determination. His resilience was impressive. Maybe I had been that impressive, once. Maybe I used to be a fighter.

But I wasn't anymore. I was nothing like the Emma from before.

I lay on the icy grass, allowing the chill to seep into my body, my bones, my soul. A voice rasped around me, grating against my brain.

'_That's right,_' it said. '_It doesn't matter what happens to you anymore, does it? Let me take you, Harry's heart. Let me take you…_'

Someone scooped me up, their body as frozen as the ground. My head lulled sideways. I had no will to run. He could hurt me all he wanted.

I saw Remus turn, his wand arm still raised. An expression of horror filled his face when he saw me in the demon's arms. 'NO!'

I watched, silent and motionless, as he was engulfed in the swarm of dementors, his silver protector nowhere to be seen.

The darkest of dark wizards carried me away from Remus. Away from the castle. Away from Harry.

Into the forest.


	8. Trapped

**Chapter Eight – Trapped**

I didn't remember passing out, but when I next opened my eyes, I was in a rocky cavern. The place was dark and dank, with a single wooden torch on the wall opposite me the only source of light. Something nearby was rattling - the sound gave me the creeps.

Amongst the ominous noise, I heard a constant rush, like whooshing waves. I breathed deep, inhaling wet, salty air. I was near the ocean.

My arms were aching. They were above my head, and I straightened, using my legs to support myself when I realised I had been hanging in my unconscious state. My wrists were in shackles.

The sand was wet and cold beneath my bare feet, and it felt like they had pins and needles. I glanced down, cringing when I saw they were an alarming shade of blue.

Shallow breathing soon caught my attention, almost lost within the rattling noise and the waves. I turned – a figure was chained up not far from me. He was slumped, but I recognised his greying hair.

'Remus!' I cried.

He shuddered, but didn't lift his head. 'It's over.' His voice was hollow.

I tugged at my chains. They shook against the rocks, though they didn't budge. 'We need to get out of here,' I said.

'It's over,' Remus said again. 'They've snapped my wand. You've been captured. Harry will come for you…' He sighed. 'It's over.'

That didn't sound like the Remus I knew. That didn't sound anything like my favourite wizard.

A cold chill washed through me. Slowly, my eyes travelled up, past Remus, to a fissure in the rocks. The rattling sound was coming from the hole. Rattling. Hissing.

Breathing.

'Dementors,' I whispered.

Remus was close, too close to them. They were sucking the happiness from his very soul.

I yanked harder at my chains. 'Fight it, Remus. You're stronger than them. You have to fight it.'

'I can't,' Remus said. He still didn't lift his head. 'I couldn't keep them away at Hogwarts. I couldn't stop them from taking me. I couldn't protect you from Voldermort. I failed.'

I gritted my teeth, straining in my shackles until they dug into my skin. 'This is hardly the time to give up.'

'Actually, I'd say this is the perfect time to give up.'

'Where's a block of chocolate when you need one?' I said, now wrenching at the chains. I growled in exasperation when they refused to loosen. 'Come _on_!'

'It's no good,' Remus said with a sigh. 'They're locked in by magic.'

'You're just a little ray of sunshine now, aren't you?'

I wasn't going to let his attitude bring me down. We were going to find a way out of this, even if I had to gnaw my hands off to do it. I wasn't a scared little girl anymore. I had recovered all of my memories – I was me again.

As though my mind wanted to prove the revelation, I received a spark of knowledge, like a match amongst the darkness. A grin stretched across my face. 'Someone's coming for us.'

Remus moaned. 'Yes. Exactly. Harry. It's over.'

'No,' I said. 'Not Harry. Someone else.' I shook my arms, trying to get the blood flowing back into them. 'We're going to need to be prepared, so snap out of it.'

'There's no point,' Remus whispered. 'It's over, it's over, it's over –'

'Are you stuck on repeat or something?'

The words had barely left my lips before I was hit with a vision – the first one I'd had since I'd lost my memories. I gasped, jolting back and knocking my head against the rocks as I struggled to catch the images flashing before my eyes.

_Harry – me – in the Great Hall. It was empty except for us._

_Harry grabbed my arm. 'No.'_

_I wrenched free. 'There's no other way. All the prophecies have to come true.' My voice was angry; filled with resentment. I still hadn't forgiven him._

_Harry's hand clamped around my wrist, his jaw set. 'I won't let you do this.'_

'_Too late,' I said._

_Someone was coming towards us, his dark cloak billowing behind him. I turned to face the intruder. He raised a skeleton-like hand, pointing his wand at me. I stood still, my expression determined, my stance defiant._

'_No!' Harry yelled._

_Red and white light shot from the tip of the wand, but at the last millisecond, Harry pushed me out of the way, taking the hit for me. He flew backwards, already dead, his body disappearing even before he hit the ground…_

'HARRY!'

My own scream jerked me back to the present, and my eyes flung open from shock.

A demon's face was pressed up against mine.

I shrieked, recoiling in horror.

The face sneered. It was flat; almost like a snake's. Its eyes were red and slitted, and its breath was putrid, like decay.

Voldermort.

'What was that?' the demon rasped. 'What happened to you, Harry's heart?'

I exhaled shakily. My mind scrambled to catch up with the present. I forced myself not to think about my vision – one problem at a time. 'N-Nothing,' I said breathlessly.

The demon swayed from side to side, examining me from all angles. 'Word is, there's a second prophecy,' he said.

I let out a snort, trying not to let my fear show. 'You're way behind. There are _three_.'

He straightened, surprise flickering across his face. 'Three? There is a third prophecy?' He glided right up to my face again. 'What are they?'

'Not telling.'

He looked as though he didn't believe what he was hearing. 'You're… not telling?'

I stared at him resolutely, my mouth firmly closed.

A ghost of a smile flickered across his face. 'That's fine – I have other ways of extracting information.'

He pressed his wand against the tip of my temple. An icy, sharp presence cut through my mind, trying to break into my thoughts.

I gasped and quickly cut him off. Occlumency was quite different outside the safety of Hogwarts, but it still had the same basic idea.

Keep out.

Voldermort pulled back his wand, his upper lip curling. 'Ah, Harry's heart is advanced. Never mind; I will break you eventually.'

'Oh, you think so?' I said.

He laughed. It was a harsh, grating sound. 'Quite an attitude you have there. I'll make sure to torture that right out of you.'

'You won't have time,' I said through my teeth. 'We'll be free before you get the chance.'

Voldermort looked incredulous. 'And how exactly do you expect to escape?'

I gave him a cocky smile. 'Someone's coming for us.'

Just as I finished the sentence, a loud caterwauling sound echoed across the caves. I was too busy gloating to wince. Voldermort whirled around, pressing his wand to his arm, where I caught sight of an ugly tattoo.

Within moments, cloaked figures swept into the cavern.

'Scour the area,' Voldermort ordered. 'Kill on sight. Wormtail, stay behind and guard the prisoners. Make sure the girl is fully exposure to the dementors – her arrogance is getting on my nerves.'

I let out a breath as Voldermort swept away from me. It was an unpleasant experience, having him so close.

Only a ratty little man remained as the rest of the dark wizards disappeared down the cave passages. I assumed he was Wormtail. He was short, fat, and balding, and had long front teeth. Instead of a cloak, he wore brown, tatty clothes, and hugged his right hand into his chest, where no one could see it. He leered at me, but I ignored him.

The screeching noise continued, long and uninterrupted, drowning out the ocean and the rattling breaths of the dementors.

I risked a glance at Remus. He remained hanging from his chains, his legs unable to support himself. He still hadn't looked up.

'Remus,' I said. 'Remus, stand up. We're going to get out of here.'

'They'll never make it to us,' Remus muttered. 'This place must be teeming with traps and magical barriers.'

I rolled my eyes. 'It's not the getting in we need to be worried about. It's the getting out.'

'What's the point?' Remus said.

'Cor,' said Wormtail, shuffling up to him. 'You're a ray of sunshine, aren't you?'

I grinned. 'That's what I said. Give him some chocolate, would you?'

Wormtail withdrew his hidden hand, which was holding a large slab of chocolate. He offered it to Remus. 'Here you are. I figured both of you would need some, but it seems our little psychic is just dandy.'

Remus studied Wormtail's offering. Slowly, with an expression of disbelief, he stood up properly. 'You… you're supposed to have a silver hand.'

Wormtail moaned. 'I know, I know. I couldn't change my skin into metal. Had to make do with hiding it underneath my clothes.'

He straightened, but he seemed to keep growing. And growing. His round stomach sucked itself in. His face changed shape, like plasticine. His balding hair grew out, turning bubblegum pink.

Remus stared when the transformation was complete. 'T-Tonks?'

She grinned. 'Wotcher.'

The dementors from the fissure swooped down towards her in a rage, but she whipped out her wand from beneath her tattered clothes. _'Expecto Patronum!'_

The vile creatures scattered backwards, away from her silver wolf. It chased them back into the fissure and paced before the entrance, its hackles raised, preventing them from escaping.

A relieved moan left Remus's lips as the feeling of danger subsided. 'Oh god –'

Tonks leaned forward, kissing him. 'What? You think we were just gonna leave you in here?'

She tapped her wand against his chains, and they fell away from the rocks. Remus dropped his arms gratefully, rubbing his wrists. Tonks handed him the chocolate. 'Here, eat this while I get Teesha.'

'It's Emma now,' I said as she approached me.

She tapped my restraints. 'So I hear,' she said with a grin. 'I guess we were all lying about our names, then.'

The shackles fell apart, freeing me. Blood pulsed through my arms. It was painful, but it felt good at the same time. Tonks knelt before me, waving her wand over my frostbitten feet. They burnt slightly for a moment, then the blue slowly began to fade.

I sighed in relief as the feeling returned to my extremities. 'Thanks.'

Tonks dug out another wand. 'Here,' she said, handing it to me. 'Harry wanted you to have it.'

I took it from her, my heart lurching at the name. But I couldn't think about him now – I had to focus on making it out of the caves alive. The wand was warm and familiar in my hand; I felt astoundingly safer with it in my possession.

'Who set off the alarm?' Remus said. He looked much better, now that the dementors were restrained and he'd had a slab of chocolate to eat.

Tonks scanned the cave. 'Sirius and Mad-Eye.' She pointed with her wand to a dark passage off to our left. 'That's the way out.'

'That's where most of the Death Eaters went,' Remus said.

'We won't go yet.'

'We'll need to be extra careful,' I said. 'Remus's wand has been snapped.'

Tonks's brow creased. 'Oh – sweetie, I'm so sorry.'

'There's nothing we can do about that now,' Remus muttered. 'All that matters is that Emma gets out of here.'

Tonks rolled her eyes. 'The rest of us might like to escape too, you know.'

'Yes, but Emma is the priority.'

The screaming of the alarm stopped abruptly. Chills ran down my body. My ears rung in the silence, but slowly the whooshing sound of the waves returned.

Tonks put her finger to her lips. The action was unnecessary – I certainly wasn't going to make a noise.

We strained to hear signs of the returning Death Eaters.

There was nothing.

Tonks backed away from the exit, in the direction of the fissure. She beckoned for us to follow, and we did so hesitantly. Her patronus remained on guard outside the makeshift prison, but that didn't stop the dementors from being highly unsettling.

Tonks had reached the fissure, but she was still moving backwards. Her patronus climbed into the darkness to push back the dementors. She stood at the entrance of the hole and gestured to us impatiently. Remus and I exchanged glances, wondering whether she'd gone insane.

Footsteps sounded down the passageway. Jeers and laughter echoed across the cavern. I could either stay out in the open and get captured, or hide with the dementors. I didn't like my choices.

Remus grabbed my hand and pulled me into the fissure just as Voldermort came into view. I remained frozen in my place, barely even breathing. Behind me, I could feel the presence of the cold, foul dementors, despite the fact that Tonks's patronus was protecting us from them.

Voldermort's cloaked followers were close behind him, dragging an unconscious robed figure between them. I squinted, trying to see who it was, but the Death Eaters were in the way.

Voldermort stopped short, his red eyes falling on the empty wall. 'Where are they?' he hissed. He spun to the others, who cowered before his rage. '_Where are they?_'

He pointed his wand into the centre of the group, sending two or three of them flying. The others dove for cover, scattering, running. They dropped the unconscious body, leaving him headfirst in the dirt.

'Find them!' Voldemort roared.

I struggled to make out the hostage in the chaos. It was definitely a professor, I could tell from the robes, and I caught sight of black hair. I shifted forward, trying to see. Remus and Tonks both lashed out, gripping either side of my wrists. I made a face in the darkness. I wasn't stupid – I wasn't trying to go anywhere. I just wanted to see.

Voldermort swooped down onto the figure as soon as the cavern was clear. He turned the professor over, onto his back, and I couldn't help a gasp escaping. Remus immediately pulled me back and clamped a hand over my mouth.

Tonks squeezed my hand to reassure me. I wasn't reassured.

Sirius – poor Sirius. We had to do something. We couldn't just leave him there.

Tonks squeezed my hand harder. I wriggled in Remus's grip. I was edgy, impatient. I didn't want to wait until Voldermort had started torturing Sirius before we made our move.

Before I could come up with a plan, though, I realised that something was happening behind us. I turned my head, restricted by Remus's grasp, and tried to see what Tonks was doing.

Her patronus was growing, stretching into a large silver shield, and bustling the dementors onto one side of the narrow corridor. She slipped on the other side of the shield, going deeper into the fissure.

Remus released me, careful to make sure I wasn't going to do anything rash, and followed her. I didn't move from my spot. Remus turned, signalling for me to come with him. I shook my head and pointed back to Sirius.

Tonks pushed Remus aside, stepped beside the silver barrier, and pointed furiously to the ground by her feet. I shook my head again. I was going to get Sirius out of there, whether she wanted me to or not.

I took one step towards the opening when a vision flashed across my mind. I saw Severus – Sirius – Wormtail…

Severus was pouring liquid down an unconscious Wormtail's throat. The little man's body bubbled and twisted, much like Draco's had when he turned into me using a Polyjuice potion.

A Polyjuice potion.

I shook my head to clear the vision. The man in the cave wasn't Sirius. It was the real Wormtail.

Relief flooded through me. I turned back and grinned at Tonks, giving her the thumbs up. Nice decoy. She sagged back gratefully, and waved for me to join her.

I turned sideways, squeezing between the rocky wall and the patronus barrier. The dementors floated on the other side of the shield, striking furiously against the silver. I held my breath. Only inches separated me from the creatures. I opted to shut my eyes, rather than look up at the darkness of the beasts. I took one cautious side-step, then another. My body was tense, my legs were shaking. Tonks and Remus were on the other side – the safe side.

I peeked as I took the last step, and exhaled heavily when I slipped past the barrier. I wasn't planning on doing a walk like that again any time soon.

Tonks made a running gesture with her fingers. She pointed to herself, then Remus, then me. I nodded, understanding. Tonks gave a giant smile, and pointed to the corners of her lips. _Think happy thoughts._ She held up three fingers. Then two. Then one.

The shield swung closed, trapping us inside the fissure and freeing the dementors. They plunged out into the cavern, circling Voldermort and fake-Sirius, obviously trying to tell their master what had happened. Tonks dropped her shield and made a run for it. She leapt out of the fissure while the dementors were still swarming. Remus was quick to follow.

'After them!' Voldermort rasped, chasing the two.

My heart pounded against my throat. I didn't like this plan. At all.

My knees knocked together as I sprinted down the corridor and jumped out of the fissure. I clutched Harry's wand and put my head down, flinching as the cloaks of dementors brushed past me. I couldn't see Remus or Tonks through the chaos. I raced through the passageway, heading for the exit.

_Think happy thoughts. Think happy thoughts._

There was no way we were going to get out of this. The whole plan was crazy. There were Death Eaters and dementors and a demented psychopathic dark wizard surrounding us. How were we supposed to escape?

_Think happy thoughts. Think happy thoughts._

And Harry – Harry was going to die. I had seen it. I wasn't ready to forgive him, but I certainly wasn't prepared to let him die, either.

The vision flashed past my eyes again, and hopelessness overwhelmed me.

I stumbled; my feet were still unstable from the frostbite, and I slammed into the sandy floor. I covered my head as several dementors dove towards me.

_Think happy thoughts. Think happy…_

I had failed. Despair blanketed my body, and clung to my throat. The darkness swirled within me once more; a depression so powerful that I could barely breathe.

The situation was hopeless. Harry had betrayed me. I had nothing left to fight for…

'EMMA!'

His voice was like oxygen. It flowed through my body, dispelling the anguish and freeing me from fear.

'_Expecto Patronum!'_

A silver shape blossomed up from the tip of Harry's wand, its antlers tossing the dementors away from me like rag dolls.

I had never successfully performed the spell before, but Harry's voice had been enough. He had come for me. I was safe.

I scrambled to my feet and stumbled in the direction I had been heading. A dim light glowed in the distance – the end of the passage. Outside. A fresh night.

Harry's silhouette in the entrance was like a beacon. I ran harder, the sand like blisters against my feet. I was eternally grateful for Tonks and her crazy morning training sessions, back when I was living with her. I never could have made it this far without them.

But then I heard the demonic rasp of my captor. He was behind me, and he was shooting spells. Light flashed around me, missing my body by millimetres. He was getting closer, even though I was running faster than ever.

Harry didn't move. He couldn't – he didn't have his wand.

I was mere steps away. Mere steps.

And then –

'_Avada Kedavra!'_

I flew into Harry's arms; his hand joined mine and wrapped around his wand; we spun, turning back towards the darkness.

'_Protego!'_

Our shield was doubled in strength, and could deflect the Torture Curse, but the Killing Curse had yet to be tested. Was our combined magic enough?

I cringed, half-expecting it to be the end, but the blast never came.

My momentum as I barrelled into Harry pushed us out of the entrance, and we began to fall. I waited to hit the ground. We didn't. My stomach jolted when I realised we were still plummeting. Free-falling.

We'd been on a cliff-face.

I stared up at the dark cloudy sky, eyes widened in horror, and mouth open. Slack. Speechless.

I knew there was water below us. Far, far below.

The fall seemed to take forever.

My body jerked abruptly. I thought I had hit the sea – it felt like I was being compressed into a tiny space.

But our surroundings changed in a flash, and suddenly we hit icy grass, far away from the ocean. I lay back, struggling to get my bearings.

Harry was already getting up. 'Come on, come on, we need to make it back into the grounds.'

He slid his arms beneath mine and hauled me to my feet. I staggered, my stomach churning from the journey. Apparation. Travelling from one place to another within moments.

Harry had Apparated, and he'd taken me with him.

I stumbled through the forest, pine needles cutting my feet. It wasn't long before we burst onto an open plain. There was a crowd of people waiting for us, and they all rushed forward as a wave.

Chattering surrounded me, but I was too dazed to make out any words.

'Are you 'urt?' Hagrid cried out over the din.

I shook my head numbly. My eyes found Remus and Tonks amongst the crowd. They seemed okay.

Hands led me forward, up the hill, towards the castle. My mind was a mess. I tried to clear it, but everyone around me was making too much noise.

We were alive. Sill, somehow, alive. It was crazy. It was impossible. I didn't dare believe it.

'It's okay,' Harry said, his voice suddenly in my ear. 'You're safe now.'

I snapped out of my stupor and wrenched away from him. 'Don't you dare talk to me,' I growled. 'You think I've forgiven you? One rescue doesn't make up for four months of depression and unspeakable torture.'

He stopped, shock flittering across his face. People walked past him, still bustling me up to safety. No one paid him any notice.

I glanced back once when we got to the base of the castle.

He was still where I'd left him, his shadowy figure standing on the slope, alone, as the sun began to rise.

I turned away and walked inside without him.


	9. Hearts

Railway Station - your reviews are very appreciated. I think you and Sailor Em are the only ones reading this story, but o well, as long as we're all having fun :D

**Chapter Nine – Hearts**

I didn't have to stay in the hospital wing overnight, thankfully. As soon as my cuts were cleared up, and my chills were taken care of, I was free to return to my dorm.

Hermione clung to my arm as we made our way back to the common room with Ron. The hallways were seeped in orange as the sun continued its ascent into the sky.

'Pansy's gone straight to court,' Hermione said, sounding a little smug. 'Dumbledore made sure of it, as soon as he heard. He thinks she'd taken over from Malfoy as a spy.'

Pansy. I'd almost forgotten about the horror of the Black Beetle Additive. Had it really only been the previous night?

'How did she do it?' I said, my throat dry.

'Visited the house elves in the kitchens during dessert,' Ron said. 'Don't look so surprised – I do it all the time, too. They're always giving you stuff.'

'The place is set out exactly the same as the Great Hall, only directly below it,' Hermione said. 'The house elves prepare the food, then send it up to our tables. Pansy just snuck in, figured out where you were sitting, and slipped the additive into your cake.'

Ron nodded. 'We talked to Dobby – he said they didn't see her do anything, otherwise they would have stopped her.'

I shuddered. 'What was to stop her from just poisoning my food, then?'

'Oh, no,' Hermione said, eyes wide. 'The food transportation magic has been prepared so that no poisons can travel between the kitchens and the Great Hall.'

'Well they should have added addiction substances into that spell,' I grumbled.

Hermione gave me a weak smile. 'I guess they didn't think of that.'

'Do you think Millicent was in on it, too?'

Hermione shrugged. 'Probably. We couldn't prove it, though.'

'Great,' I said glumly. We could get rid of as many spies as we liked – they just seemed to keep on coming. I changed the topic to prevent from dwelling. 'So I'm still fuzzy on how we actually managed to escape from Voldermort.'

'It was very cool,' Hermione said. 'The professors came up with a plan within minutes. Then Tonks and Moody showed up, and they were ready to dive right in.'

'Catching Wormtail would've been the hardest bit,' Ron said.

Hermione shot him a glare. 'I think stunning enough Death Eaters to make a path for their escape was slightly more complicated.'

'No way – that's easy. Point and shoot.' He demonstrated with his wand. 'But Wormtail's a slippery fellow.'

'Emma. Emma!'

We turned as Remus hurried to catch up with us. I smiled. 'How are you?'

'Getting there. Can't wait to sleep off the aches and pains, though.'

'Tell me about it.'

Remus looked pointedly at Ron and Hermione. 'May I speak to Emma for a moment?'

The pair glanced and me, and I nodded. They wandered further down the passage, chatting to a few of the portraits, out of earshot.

'What is it?' I said.

Remus hesitated. 'About Harry –'

'I'm not ready to talk about him yet.'

'I know. I just thought I'd play spokesperson, because I know you'd hear me out.' I pursed my lips, but I didn't stop him, and he took it as encouragement to continue. 'Harry's had a lot of betrayals over the years. He'd become rather paranoid… well, you saw him the very first time you arrived here. He didn't want to trust you. He was too _scared_ to trust you. So you can imagine how it must have felt for him to finally open up to you, only to discover you'd turned on him.'

'But I didn't,' I said in exasperation.

'I know,' Remus said quickly. 'It's just that when someone's worst fear comes true, rational thought can go out the window.'

I threw my hands up. 'He should have listened to me. I tried to tell him –'

'Like I said, he wasn't exactly using his best judgement. I'm not trying to defend his actions,' he added quickly when I opened my mouth to argue. 'I'm just saying how it is.' He lowered his voice. 'He's suffered. A lot.'

'He's suffered?' I said incredulously. '_He's_ suffered? I was the one who was tortured! I was the one who went insane! I was the one lived with depression for four months!'

'Yes, and he's had to live with the fact that the girl he loves more than anything in the world went through hell because of _him_.' He put a hand on my shoulder. 'Emma, he's been through a lot. I don't think he can take much more.'

I pulled away from him. 'That's not my problem, is it?' I said darkly.

I turned and started towards Ron and Hermione, leaving him behind.

xxx

I slept the entire day, and most of the night as well. I woke up before sunrise, but I didn't want to go down to the common room. Chances were that Harry would be up by the fireplace. Like usual.

So I lay in bed, grateful that the dorm now only had two other girls. Pansy's bed was empty, and her suitcases were gone.

I wondered if she had been working for Voldermort the entire time – even when Malfoy was around. It was a frightening thought. She had been sleeping in the same room as me for months.

When the sun finally rose, I got up and changed, dreading the idea of facing the student body. Hermione stayed with me, but we didn't have a lot to say to each other. She wasn't sure what I was going to do about Harry.

_I_ wasn't sure what I was going to do about Harry.

Remus was waiting for me in the entrance to the Great Hall, preventing me from getting my breakfast. 'Good morning,' he said.

'Morning,' I replied, glancing wistfully around him to the nearest stack of pancakes. Students jostled past with their usual hostility.

'Are you ready to continue your lessons?' Remus said.

My eyes snapped away from the dining table. 'Lessons?'

'Yes. July is getting closer and closer. The prophecies –'

'The prophecies?' I said wryly, cutting him off. 'No offence, but I've decided not to put much faith in those things.'

Remus looked tense. 'Professor Dumbledore is certain that the first prophecy still stands –'

He kept talking, but I tuned out as my vision from the caverns returned to me.

_All the prophecies have to come true._

That's what I had said in the premonition.

_All _the prophecies. Including the first one.

I gasped. 'Remus!'

He stopped mid-sentence. 'What is it? Did you have a vision?'

I stared up at him, the blood draining from my face. 'It's me,' I said hoarsely. 'I'm the one who's got to die.'

Remus looked bewildered. 'What do you mean?'

'All the prophecies are relevant,' I said, my mind ticking over. 'Dumbledore's right – the first prophecy still stands. Voldermort and Harry will fight to the death. But the third prophecy says that either Harry or me must fall in the battle for the Order of the Phoenix to be victorious. So –'

'So it can't be Harry,' Remus said, trying to keep up. 'Because it logically follows that he must survive in order for the first prophecy to come to pass.' His eyes fell upon me. 'Which means…'

My stomach clenched uncomfortably. I didn't want breakfast anymore.

Remus let out a long breath. 'Oh, Emma.'

His sympathetic tone caused tears to spring to my eyes. 'I really got the crappy end of this deal, didn't I?'

Remus shook his head. 'No,' he said. 'No, there's got to be another way. We'll find another way. Hermione and Ron are researching past prophecies, and Professor Dumbledore's talking to Seers, and –'

'And it won't matter, anyway,' I said quietly.

'What do you mean?'

I dropped my gaze. 'I had a vision, in the cavern. Before Voldermort appeared. I saw Harry pushing me out of the way, and taking the blow for me.' I drew in a shaky breath. 'If he does that, we'll lose.'

Remus took my arm and led me away from the bustle of the Great Hall and into a quiet passageway. 'Are you sure?' he said in a low voice.

'Positive.'

'How far in the future do you think this happens?'

I shrugged. 'Couldn't say.'

'And what were the circumstances? Tell me everything.'

'There's not much to tell,' I said. 'Harry and I were alone in the Great Hall. We were arguing – I said the prophecies had to come true, and Harry was trying to stop me. Then Voldermort waltzed right in and shot a spell at us. Harry pushed me out of the way –'

'Stop, stop, stop.' Remus stared at me. 'Voldermort just walked into the Great Hall?'

I nodded. 'Easily. And it wasn't the Killing Curse he threw at me, either. It was something else, with red and white light.'

Remus's eyebrows shot up. 'Red and white? I've never heard such a thing. Did you hear the incantation?'

I shook my head. 'No. But Harry died and vanished before he even hit the ground.'

'Vanished?'

'Yeah. His body just faded into nothing.' I had tried to sound impassive – after all, my visions occurred so I could _prevent_ the outcome – but obviously pain had slipped into my voice, because Remus's brow creased.

'We're not going to let anything happen. To either of you.'

I blinked back tears. 'I just… I just don't know how to go about changing that future.'

'How about starting by altering the path you're on?' Remus said.

I frowned at him, puzzled. 'I don't understand.'

'Well, in the vision, had you forgiven him?'

I remembered how angry I had been; how resentful. I shook my head in reply.

'Well, there you go,' Remus said. 'Change the future by changing your path. Forgive Harry, and you'll already be making things drastically different.'

I fell into shocked silence. His reasoning was too sensible to argue with.

He beamed at me. 'Great. Well, see you in my office in half an hour. Harry and I will be waiting for you.'

xxx

The thought of Harry getting killed was like a sickness through my body. I got shivers and fevers and headaches one after another. I had lost my appetite, so I returned to the common room and sat by the fire, staring into the flames and trying to ignore the throbbing behind my temple.

I was so angry at him, and yet I couldn't let him die. Confusion swirled within me, making it difficult to think straight.

I still hadn't made any kind of decision by the time I had to meet Remus in his office. I hated the thought of confronting Harry – how was I supposed to act? What was I supposed to say?

When I reached my destination, I stood outside the door for a full five minutes before entering. Remus was crouched down at the back of the room, skimming through his book shelf. Harry was leaning on the other side of his desk, facing away from me.

I cleared my throat and closed the door behind me. 'Hello,' I said.

Harry didn't turn.

Remus stood, dusting his robes. 'Ah, come in. I was just looking for any reference to that spell from your vision. There seems to be no mention of one that produces red and white light.' He hesitated. 'Are you sure…?'

'I'm sure,' I said.

He nodded. 'Just checking.' He glanced at Harry. 'Shall we get started?'

I watched the back of Harry's head as he nodded. Nostalgia rose up within me. I missed running my fingers through his hair.

But then he turned, and the bittersweet memory faded. Instead, I remembered the way his face twisted in hatred as he pointed his wand at me…

'_Crucio.'_

I snapped out of it, shaking my head to dispel the image. 'I can't,' I said.

Remus tilted his head. 'You can't what?'

'I can't forgive him.' I glanced at Harry. 'I'm sorry. I know I shouldn't hold a grudge. And I know you've been through some pretty rotten stuff.' I drew a breath. 'But that's not enough. Every time I look at you, I remember what you did. My mind won't… won't let me forget how you treated me. How you tortured me.' I lowered my gaze. 'I'll train with you, but I don't… I don't want to be with you.'

I heard a slight tremor as Harry exhaled. I could only imagine the look of disappointment on Remus's face.

'You conjured a patronus,' Harry said quietly. My eyes flickered up to him. He looked away. 'When I called out to you. You conjured a patronus.'

Remus looked fascinated. 'Really? It was a stag, correct? Because your magic is identical to…' He trailed off at my expression. 'Sorry, sorry, bigger things to worry about.'

'I was grateful to be escaping,' I said to Harry. 'You called out, and I realised I was safe. It wasn't because it was _you_ there to save me, specifically.'

'Oh,' Harry said.

We fell silent. No one said anything for a long time. When I finally raised my eyes, Harry's expression was blank. It didn't surprise me. He'd always been closed off, even when we'd first fallen in love. When we were still… happy.

'I'd say that time would heal your pain,' Remus said at last, 'but that's the one thing we're running out of.' He sighed. 'Let's just get started, shall we?'

xxx

The days passed. Harry and I continued in our awkward interaction. He was cold and closed off, much like he had been the first time I'd met him. I was adamant to mirror his indifference. If he didn't care, I didn't care.

But then he would stand behind me, his hand around mine as we held the wand together to practice a spell, and his touch would send my heart racing. At first I thought the increased pulse was due to anxiety, but when my breath caught, and I'd get flutters in my stomach, I knew it was something else.

I did miss him. I would admit that much. It was just that I couldn't let go of what he'd done. I tried – the thought of him dying was nearly too much to bear – but my mind would not let me forget his past actions.

Dumbledore left for some kind of secret mission soon after the start of March. It was a tense couple of days, with the castle security being on high alert. Tonks, Kingsley, and Moody all returned, prowling the grounds to ensure we remained safe.

I had never fully appreciated Dumbledore's role until now. He was clearly one of the only reasons the university was safe.

He returned on a Monday, in the middle of one of Sirius's lessons. I was grateful – Sirius had started preaching about the importance of forgiveness, and I was getting another headache.

'Please excuse the interruption,' said Dumbledore as he swept into the classroom. 'Emma, I'd like to talk to you.'

I stood, warily eyeing the letter in his hand. 'What's that?'

'It comes with a story. Would you please join me in my office?'

I glanced back once and Sirius and Harry, before following the elderly wizard through the castle, up to the strange small room with whizzing instruments and clinking contraptions.

He settled behind his desk, placing the letter in full view before him and gesturing for me to take a seat opposite. 'First, I would like to tell you that I have scoured many books and interviewed every expert in the field of spells. No one has ever heard of anything producing both red and white light. Whatever magic Voldermort was using in your vision is, as far as I am aware, unknown.'

'So it's new?' I said, my stomach twisting in fright.

Dumbledore steepled his fingers. 'Possibly,' he said. 'However, I am more inclined to believe the spell he is going to use will be old. Very, very old. You may remember, last time you were here, that members of the Order were reporting Voldermort was sending scouts all over the world, searching for something. This spell may be linked to his pursuit, somehow.'

'How will we find out for sure?' I said, struggling to suppress my rising panic. 'How will we know what he's planning to do?'

'We already know what he's planning to do,' Dumbledore said. 'And we already know what the results will be. The spell kills, destroying the body.' He grew grave, lowering his voice, almost as though he was speaking to himself. 'And who knows what else.'

I shivered.

He caught the action, and his face changed, a smile breaking the grimness. 'Let us discuss our second, less gloomy topic. I have discovered another young lady who has visions, just like you.'

The words hit me like a truck. I sunk deeper into my chair, stunned. 'You… have?'

'Indeed. Sadly, she passed away, and it was extremely difficult to get a hold of any information on her. You see, she was a squib. She shunned the entire wizarding community and took up residence with a muggle, living life without magic. I was fortunate to hear about her from our dear Professor Trelawny. She did not have favourable things to say about this particular woman –'

'What a surprise,' I said wryly. I clamped my mouth shut when I realised I'd interrupted. 'Sorry.'

Dumbledore smiled. 'You are forgiven.' He leaned forward in his chair. 'I have been fascinated about your abilities since you returned, you see. You are clearly more than just a psychic, considering you can do magic, despite being a muggle. There must be some explanation, and one can often find answers in history. So I asked Professor Trelawny if she had heard of any individuals – wizards _or_ muggles – who were lucky enough to possess a powerful gift of Sight. True visions that gave solid facts about the future. She mentioned rumours about a squib woman who claimed to be able to see such things, but she dismissed the reports as fabrications.'

'But they were true.'

Dumbledore tipped his head. 'You may remember that Professor Snape and I left for a few days prior to bringing Mr Ollivander in to have you fitted for a wand.' I nodded, and he continued. 'We'd infiltrated the Ministry of Magic, searching for all records of squibs who were about your age during the time Professor Trelawny had said the reports existed.'

'And…?' I was literally sitting on the edge of my chair.

'And we found one woman of considerable interest. She had moved to a place very close to where you used to live. Her name was Sophia.'

I jolted upright. My stomach dropped, and my mouth went dry. 'You're… you're not talking about my mother… are you?'

'Indeed I am,' Dumbledore said.

I was finding it very difficult to breathe. It was almost as though I was sinking. 'I have her psychic abilities? I inherited my mother's power?'

'No,' Dumbledore said. 'Not inherited. Copied. The same way you copied Harry's power.'

A painful sensation ripped through me. I know it was stupid, but suddenly I felt like a cheat. A fraud.

My mother had been the one with the real power. She was the true psychic. She should have been here, helping the Order. Not me.

I sat back, staring at nothing. 'Oh,' I said quietly.

'And she left you this.' Dumbledore picked up the letter and held it out for me.

I didn't move. 'Where did you get that?'

'In the house where she used to live. Where _you_ used to live. That's where I've been these past few days.'

I still didn't touch it. 'I was given everything of my mother's already.'

'This was hidden,' Dumbledore said. 'I had to find it by magic.'

He nudged the letter into my hand, and I unwillingly accepted it. Even the feel of the old paper was enough to leave tingles beneath my skin. 'What made you think she'd left a note in the first place?'

'Magical beings always seem to have some secret that they only want revealed after their death,' Dumbledore said. 'Mistakes, confessions, spells gone awry. It is common practice in wizarding communities to leave messages behind. It was most likely culturally embedded within your mother to do the same.'

I slipped my finger beneath the tab, tugging it free. Part of me was dying to know what she'd said.

The other part of me wanted to vomit on Dumbledore's nice red rug.

I flipped open the envelope and pulled out the note. It was written on cream paper, and had a familiar scent – like something I might have smelled a long, long time ago.

I inhaled deeply, putting off the inevitable for as long as possible.

Finally, when I could stand it no more, I opened the letter and stared down at the writing. It was straight and neat and cursive – nothing like mine.

_I have a power,_ it said. _No one believes me, but I can see the future. And I see that my daughter has a wonderful gift. She can love so deeply, so fully, that when she accepts someone into her heart, she accepts their magic, too._

_If you are reading this, and I am gone, please take care of her. She is destined for great things._

That was all, but that was enough.

'Love?' I said, clinging to the letter as though it was my oxygen. 'My power is based on _love_?'

'You have your mother's gift because you loved her,' Dumbledore said. 'Even though you were only a baby, you loved her completely, and was therefore able to share her Sight. And Harry –'

I was feeling dizzy. 'Yes. Right. Harry.'

'Emma, he is a part of you now. You cannot change that. Resenting him is only doing both of you harm.'

I gritted my teeth to stop any tears that dared to form. 'I don't know how to forgive him.'

'Yes, it can be very hard to let go of the betrayal of a loved one,' Dumbledore said quietly. 'But it can also be very easy.'

'How is it easy?' I demanded, swiping at a defiant stray tear.

Dumbledore gestured to the letter. 'The answer is in there.'

As I absorbed the words for a second time, memorising every little detail, he spoke again.

'I believe the problem is that you're trying to forgive him with your mind. Perhaps, considering the place where you actually keep him, you should be forgiving him with your heart.'

xxx

I went back to bed and cried after that, hugging the precious letter to my chest and letting out all of the fear and anger and frustration that had been clinging to me since I'd gotten my memories back.

There had only been a few times in my life when I'd truly, truly needed my mother with me, and this was one of them.

People shouldn't have to go through this. Witches, wizards, muggles – it didn't matter who they were; no one deserved to be burdened with the mental trauma that I had been forced to carry.

I thought about Harry. He had grown up without his parents, just like me. He had exactly the same weight of the prophecy that I did. And he had been through hell too – he had watched Voldermort torture his girlfriend until she died. If there was anyone out there that could share my pain, it was him.

Then, finally, I realised what my problem was. Harry wasn't sharing. Harry had _never_ shared.

I couldn't forgive him for his actions, because he'd never explained why he'd done it in the first place. He'd always let someone else do it for him.

I inhaled a few last shuddering breaths before I composed myself. Harry's jacket was buried under a few clothes in my trunk; I dug it out and put it on, leaving the dorm. The common room, the hallways, and the bathroom were all empty – everyone was in class. I splashed cold water on my face and examined myself in the mirror. I wasn't exactly picture-perfect, but it would have to do.

I didn't need to return to Remus's office. I knew where Harry was.

It was only sprinkling outside, but the dark clouds threatened a downpour. I headed out towards the Quiddich pitch. It had been a long time since I'd seen the expansive field up close. Several students were soaring above, training for the next match.

I found Harry sitting alone on the slope, watching them.

It took a fair amount of courage to sit beside him. I was trembling all over, but I managed to keep my voice steady. 'You really miss being normal, huh?'

He tensed in surprise, not answering me for a moment. 'No,' he muttered finally. 'I can't miss it. I never discovered what normal was.' He didn't turn to me. 'What did Dumbledore want?'

I dug the toe of my shoe into the grass. 'He'd found a letter from my mother. Turns out I'd copied her power, just like I copied yours.'

He was silent.

I studied him, waiting for some reaction; any reaction. When it didn't come, I continued. 'She was a squib, you know.'

'Mmm.' Harry sounded completely uninterested.

I shook my head and stared at the sky as the rain fell harder. 'God, you're so detached. You always were – even when we were together.'

He didn't reply.

I rolled my eyes, refusing to speak. If he wanted the conversation to continue, he was going to have to push for it.

I sat back, leaning on my palms. The rain got heavier. My hair clung to my face, and my jeans darkened with each drop.

The Quiddich players zoomed over us, returning to the castle without even bothering to stop by the change rooms.

I didn't move. Harry didn't move. We were at an impasse.

Or so I thought.

'It's easier that way,' Harry said at last.

'What way?' I said.

He stared forward, at nothing. 'Being detached. Ever since Cho…' He trailed off and shook his head. 'No one can hurt you if you don't let them in. It was working, too.' A bitter laugh fell past his lips. 'Then you came along.'

I scowled. 'You hurt me more than I hurt you.'

'Yes, but you _keep_ hurting me.'

'So?' I demanded, sitting up properly and wiping at the grass that clung to my hands. 'Nothing will make up for what you did.'

'Is this another "it's over between us" speech? Because we've already run through it. Twice.'

We'd had to raise our voices – the rain was pelting down in sheets now. The ground was soggy, and squelched beneath me.

'See, you're doing it again!' I said. 'Why do you act like this doesn't matter to you?'

'Why do you care?' he shot back. 'You're the one who ended it.'

I wanted to strangle him. 'Look, if I'm ever going to open my heart to you again, you're going to have to open up to _me_.'

'Why?' he said in frustration. 'You already know how I feel about you. You already know that I'm willing to do whatever it takes to keep you alive.'

'If you really loved me that much, then why didn't you even _try_ listening to me that night?'

'You heard what Malfoy said!' he snapped. 'He told me you were going to convince everyone that you were innocent –'

'Because I was!'

'I saw you stab Seamus!'

'You saw _Malfoy_ stab Seamus. God, you are so infuriating! There were so many ways you could have been tricked, but instead you chose to believe I had turned on you. You should have trusted me.'

'I _did_ trust you! I let you in – closer than anyone had ever been.' He bowed his head and choked a sob. 'It was the most terrifying thing I'd ever done. People are never who they seem in this world, Emma. One of my dad's best friends is the reason why he and my mother are dead. Ron's pet rat turned out to be the same goddam creep. Someone impersonated Moody for a _year_. The only way to stay safe is to keep everyone away.'

His shoulders shuddered, and he ran his hands down his drenched face, unable to look at me. I chewed on my lip, watching the rain drip from his fringe. Very slowly, very tentatively, I lifted my fingers and brushed his damp hair back.

He turned to me, his expression drained, his eyes dull. 'I l-love you,' he said, and his voice caught on the word. He frowned. 'But I wish we hadn't met. I hate that you're caught up in my war. I hate that I hurt you. And if you die in this battle, I don't know how I'm ever going to live with myself.'

I stared at him, shocked speechless. I had also wished, at one point, that we hadn't met. Only now… now I couldn't imagine not knowing him. What if I had never witnessed the way his lips quirked up when one of his friends made a joke? What if I had never smelled that scent; the one that clung to his jacket? What if I had never felt his hand brushing my skin? What if I had never tasted his kisses?

I wouldn't have been the same person. I wouldn't have been a _better_ person.

I thought back to my life before I'd discovered magic. Even if I still had the flashy job, the nice apartment, and the hot boyfriend, I would never have been this complete.

I had a heritage, now. A reason to fight. I had friends that were practically family.

And I had Harry.

'Would you trust me now?' I said, taking his hand in mine.

He rose his gaze to me. 'What?'

I laced our fingers together. 'If I forgave you, and we got back together. Would you trust me?'

He studied me, probably unable to believe what he was hearing. 'Yes,' he breathed. 'Yes, of course I would. But I never even dreamed that you would –'

I cut him off with a kiss. My heart had heard enough.


	10. The Request

This chapter is somewhat shorter than the others, due to the nature of "The Request".

Enjoy!

**Chapter Ten – The Request**

There was no feeling quite like forgiving Harry. To be free of all that anger and bitterness made me almost weightless. He had opened up to me; trusted me, and I felt safe to do the same. My heart was soaring.

My mind took a little longer to catch up, but soon the tormenting echoes of that night faded, replaced by new memories, precious memories. Safe memories.

Harry talked to me. _Really_ talked to me. He told me how it was to live a life with people treating him like a god, but at the same time like a leper. Everyone was willing to worship him, as long as they didn't get close enough to risk their lives.

He told me how a part of him wished he'd die in the fight ahead, because he wouldn't know what to do without something like the prophecy driving him forward.

He even started telling me what happened with Cho, but each word seemed like a struggle, and at last I took his hand and told him that I didn't need to know.

We were happy. We were reckless.

And we held hands in public.

Students whispered and pointed and gossiped between classes. They gave me strange looks, though most of them were simply confused.

I didn't care about them anymore. They could say what they wanted. And the fight with Voldermort was so close now, anyway, that it hardly seemed dangerous to display our relationship in public.

Security around the castle soared. Members of the Order were constantly patrolling – outside the castle and in. Dobby had been put on constant surveillance in the kitchens, ensure that no student was allowed to enter.

Ron had a long-winded grumble about that.

'I mean, it's not like I'm up to anything bad,' he said as we sat around the common room fireplace one night. 'I just need snacks between classes. I'm happy to stand outside the door and let the elves hand me something, but he won't even let me do that!'

Hermione lifted her head from her work long enough to shoot him a glare.

I was in too good a mood to join Ron in his complaints. While sneaking out for sweets sounded fun, it wasn't on my list of priorities. The fact that I was snuggled in Harry's arms on the armchair _was_.

'So here's a question,' Hermione said, not looking up from her textbook. 'Not to be morbid or anything, but if you guys were to die tomorrow, what would be the one thing you regretted not doing?'

'Getting my last snack from the kitchens,' Ron said immediately.

Harry laughed. I smiled as I felt his chest vibrate against my back. I cuddled deeper into the arm he had around my shoulders, and rested my temple against his jaw. 'What about you?' I said to him.

His lips found my forehead. 'I'd never really given much thought to what I wanted to do later in life,' he said.

I took his free hand and played with his fingers. 'There must be something you want.'

'I have everything I want right here.'

'Careful, mate,' Ron said, prodding a stray, uncharred log in the fireplace with his toe. 'Don't let Sirius hear you say that, or he'll be demanding to know why he isn't on the guest list.'

'What about you, Emma?' Hermione said. 'Surely you had life plans, before you were swept into the world of magic.'

I stared into the flames, my shoulders lifting into a shrug. 'I did. But they all fell apart anyway, before I got here.'

Harry shifted slightly. 'What do you mean?'

All eyes were on me. I looked away, feeling awkward. 'Nothing,' I muttered.

'No, go on,' Hermione said.

I sighed, releasing Harry's hand so I could dig my finger into the seams of the armchair. 'I just… I had a really good career, you know? I was working my way up the corporate ladder. I was a top executive, and everyone kept saying that I was headed for great things.'

'Well, you _are_ headed for great things,' Ron said blankly. 'You're going to take part in saving the world.'

'Right,' I said, and bitterness crept into my voice. 'With my mother's visions and Harry's magic. None of that is my own.'

'Don't be silly!' Hermione said.

Harry tightened his grip around my shoulders. 'It's not the power you have that makes you special, it's the way you use it.'

'Yeah, yeah,' I said sourly.

'So what else?' Hermione said, changing the subject. 'Did you have a boyfriend back home? Was it serious?'

I felt Harry tense, and pressed my hand against his knee to comfort him. 'Yes, but he told me he was cheating on me the same day I got fired. It kind of stopped being serious after that.'

Ron whistled. 'Talk about the mother of all bad days.'

'No kidding,' I said. 'Except by the end of it, I was here, and that's not so bad.'

Hermione stared at me. 'You found out about magic the same day you got fired _and_ dumped?'

'And lost my apartment,' I added.

Harry chuckled. 'What are you worried about, then? Fighting Voldermort will be a piece of cake compared to that.'

'Speaking of fighting Voldermort,' Hermione said, swinging the topic back around. 'You never answered my question. You had all these life plans – what with your job, and your boyfriend, and your apartment. So what's something you regret not doing?'

I leant back again, resting my head against Harry's shoulder. 'Honestly, Hermione? How can I regret anything when I have you guys?'

Harry pressed his lips to my ear. 'I know something I'd regret if I died tomorrow. Not sleeping with you tonight.'

My lips twitched, and I tilted my head up to him. 'Well, let's change that right now, shall we?'

We excused ourselves, creeping out of the common room and down the halls, to the Room of Requirement.

We spent the night there, lost together amongst the blankets and candles and rose petals.

It was wonderful. _He _was wonderful. It wasn't so much that he was some sort of expert, or that he knew exactly what I liked – it was more that I loved him so very much, and each caress and kiss felt more incredible than it ever could with any other man. Besides, it was more fun exploring and playing and discovering for ourselves, rather than already knowing.

A crack of sunlight crept into the room, signalling morning. I drew away from Harry's embrace. I couldn't be bothered finding my clothes, so I grabbed his shirt from the carpet by my feet and slipped it on instead.

He watched me as I drew back the drapes, allowing the sun to wash warmth over my body. 'There,' I said, turning to him with a playful smile. 'Now we can die today.'

I sat on the bed, and he shifted over to me, brushing the hair from my neck and kissing at the exposed skin. 'Well, we didn't exactly sleep,' he said, smiling against me.

'Do you regret it?'

'Nope.'

I giggled. 'Then it doesn't count.'

His fingers found my sides, and he starting tickling me. I fell sideways into his lap, laughing and squirming. 'Stop it!'

'What's the magic word?'

'Abracadabra!'

'That is _so_ not the magic word.'

I shrieked, half-wanting him to stop, and half-wanting it to go on forever.

It was probably around this time that I realised that all the pain, all the grief, and all the torture had been worth it, just for this one moment.

xxx

I should have known that nothing so good could last for long.

Soon after that morning, Harry began to act very peculiar. He was distracted all the time, and had a lot of hushed conversations with Hermione. I could never quite get all of his attention. It was unnerving.

April holidays came, and the students went home, leaving the castle empty and silent. I'd hoped that Harry would start acting normal, now that only people he trusted were around, but he continued to evade my questions, and persisted with the strange, distant attitude.

And then, out the blue, he and Hermione announced that they were going on a trip outside the castle. There was barely any forewarning, which was probably a good thing, because it meant his enemies wouldn't find out and have a chance to form an attack plan.

But I still didn't like it.

'I don't understand why you're going,' I said as members of the Order rushed around the entrance of the castle, preparing for the outing.

Harry tugged at the top of my sweater and pulled me close, planting his lips on my forehead. 'Some things can't be done from here,' he said.

I exhaled in exasperation. 'That's not an answer. And why aren't I coming with you? I'm your protector.'

Harry gestured to Sirius, Tonks, Kingsley, Minerva, Moody, and Hermione. 'I think they just might cover you,' he said with the hint of a smile.

I studied his face, trying to work out what he was hiding, trying to have some kind of premonition of what he was planning to do.

'Stop it,' he said, mussing my hair and breaking my concentration. 'Your visions won't help you this time. I'm not in any danger.'

I pursed my lips, unable to hide my annoyance. 'I thought we didn't keep secrets from each other.'

He placed his hands on either side of my neck and ran his thumbs against my jaw. 'We also trust each other.' He dipped his head, until his forehead met mine. 'Do you trust me?'

I scowled. Damn. He had me on that one. 'Yes,' I grumbled.

He kissed me. 'Good. So stop worrying. We'll be back in a few hours.'

'Hopefully,' said Hermione as she bustled past. 'These things take time, I hear.'

I lunged out and grabbed her arm. 'It's not too late to change your mind,' I said, trying not to sound too desperate. 'Stay here, where it's safe.'

She sighed, looking harried. 'Business has to be done, Emma.' She glanced at Harry. 'Everything's ready. Let's go.'

I watched, frustrated and confused, as the group headed out of the castle and down the long driveway to the gates. Harry glanced back at me and smiled.

_Stop worrying_, he mouthed.

Yeah. Like I would ever stop worrying.

I sighed and slumped back into the castle. There was only a little table set up in the Great Hall, since all the students were on holidays. Ron was already there, smothering his sausages in tomato sauce. 'They head off okay?' he said.

'I s'pose,' I muttered, sliding into the seat beside him. I picked up a fork and jabbed at a waffle. 'Do you have any idea where they're going?'

'Did the last one hundred and five answers not get through your eardrums?' Ron said, sounding more than a little irritated. 'No. I haven't got a clue where they're headed off to.'

Remus and Dumbledore returned from the front of the castle, talking quietly amongst themselves. Their conversation stopped when they joined us.

'Morning, Ron,' Remus said, sitting opposite us. 'Didn't you want to say goodbye?'

Ron scowled. 'If Hermione isn't going to bother telling me what she's doing, then I'm not going to be standing around waving her off like a git.'

I stared down at my waffle, unable to find the motivation to eat.

'Harry's in good hands,' Dumbledore said, noticing my distraction. I glanced up at him, and he smiled. 'You mustn't stress yourself over this. You will have a vision if anything goes awry.'

'Don't worry, Albus,' Remus said, pouring us all some orange juice from a pitcher. 'I'll make sure she has a full-on lesson with Severus. She won't even notice Harry's gone.'

'Oh great,' I muttered into my goblet.

Remus set the pitcher down. 'I should have gone with him,' he murmured.

I reached across and patted his hand. 'Just because you have to use a different wand, doesn't make you useless.'

A breath hissed past Remus's lips. 'Try saying that when you're holding someone else's wand.'

'I don't understand why Mr Ollivander can't just make you another one with the same stuff in it,' I said.

Dumbledore shook his head. 'Wands don't work like that. The situation is similar to parents having two children. The offspring originate from the same place, but they are completely different. Eat your waffle.'

Remus was true to his word – by the end of my lesson with Severus, I could barely function. My mind was throbbing from warding off attacks. It didn't matter that I had managed to block Voldermort during my capture; Severus was intent on strengthening my skills even further.

I slumped back up to the common room, lying down on the couch by the fire with a groan. Not long after, Dobby scurried over to me with a wet flannel. He held it out, the picture of innocence, not a trace of bitterness on his face.

I took the offering warily. 'Thanks,' I said, placing it to my forehead. It soothed the ache substantially.

Dobby beamed. 'Dobby is glad to help Miss Emma.'

'Aren't you… you know…' I twirled my finger as I contemplated the best way to phrase my question, '… pissed off that I hurt you?'

'Master Harry told Dobby that Miss Emma was under a spell. Dobby cannot be angry with dear Miss Emma.'

I giggled. 'You're sweet.' I sat up in sudden inspiration. 'Do you know where Harry and Hermione went today?'

Dobby clamped his hand over his mouth, eyes wide. He nodded mutely.

'Great!' I said. 'Tell me where they are, then!'

Dobby released his mouth with a gasp. 'Dobby is not allowed to tell.'

'There's clothing in it if you do,' I tempted. 'I could make you leg warmers or something.'

Dobby shook his head determinedly. 'Master Harry told Dobby what to say if Miss Emma was to ask of his whereabouts. _Trust him,_ is what Master Harry said.'

I groaned and slumped back on the couch. 'Damn him. He thought of everything!'

Dobby hummed, and gave a slight skip as he went to the fireplace to poke at the crackling logs.

'Can I guess from your cheerfulness that whatever he's doing is a good thing?' I said.

He turned, grinning from ear. 'It is indeed, Miss Emma! It is indeed.' And he left the room, twirling as though he had an imaginary dance partner.

I dozed after that, the combination of my lesson with Severus and many late nights with Harry leaving me rather exhausted. When I awoke abruptly several hours later, the sun was beginning to set.

'It's about time,' Ron said, warming his hands by the fire. He shivered. 'Blimey, it's cold. Hagrid and I were out feeding the Thestrals all afternoon. We would have asked you to join us, but you were dead to the world.'

'Was I?' I said, sitting up groggily. I glanced around. 'Is Harry back?'

'Not yet.'

Ron didn't seem worried, but my heart jumped to my throat. 'Not yet?' I said, my voice rising a pitch. 'Why not? Has anyone heard from them?'

'Relax, would you?' Ron said. 'The errand probably took them longer than they thought.'

'Errand?' I studied him suspiciously. He was trying much too hard to keep his face clean of expression. 'You know, don't you? Someone told you what they were doing while I was asleep.'

Ron grimaced. 'I knew I wasn't going to be able to keep a secret from a psychic.'

I leapt off the couch. 'Where are they? Tell me!'

'Nah, you'll find out eventually. C'mon, let's go get dinner – I'm starving.'

He dashed out of the room before I could stop him, and I chased him all the way down to the ground floor. He skidded to a stop just before the Great Hall. 'Oh bugger – I forgot something. I'll be back in a second.'

I narrowed my eyes, watching as he scampered back the way we'd come. He was a terrible liar.

I was half-tempted to follow him, but I noticed a strange glow coming from the Great Hall, and headed down the passage towards it.

The moment I stepped in, I knew something big was happening. The place was empty of tables. Instead, the air was filled with hovering candles, all scented, all leaving a lingering, sweet aroma, like a field of fresh flowers.

Harry was in the middle.

He attempted a smile, but it shook. 'Hi,' he said.

Relief washed through me. He was back. He was safe.

It was so good to see him after fretting all day.

The relief didn't last long, though. Curiousity was taking over. I stepped carefully between the candles, until I was close enough to give him a kiss. 'Hi,' I said. 'What's all this?'

'This,' he said breathlessly, 'is the place where we met. The place where my life changed.'

My smile was fixed on my face, but my pleasant surprise was swiftly being replaced by confusion, and a little fear. What was he doing?

Harry reached over and took both my hands in his. 'Emma,' he said.

The seriousness in his tone spiked my fear into panic. He couldn't be breaking up with me, could he? Not now – not after everything we'd been through. Not after everything we still had to face together.

'I've been thinking about us,' he said, causing me to cringe. 'And I've been thinking about Hermione's question. About what I'd regret most, if I died tomorrow.'

I squeezed his hands. 'You're not going to die tomorrow. I would have had a vision if you were.'

'But I might die in this battle, and you _did_ see that,' he said.

'We've already changed that path –'

'But it still might happen,' Harry said. The firmness in his voice stopped me short. He drew a trembling breath. 'It still might happen, and I've been thinking about what I want. What I might regret.'

He released one of my hands and dug into his inner jacket pocket. I thought he was reaching for his wand, but he pulled out a black velvet case the size of a matchbox instead.

It felt as though the ground had opened up beneath me. I was falling into infinity.

'I realised recently,' he said, 'that the thing I'd regret most is not being yours. Wholly and eternally yours.' He slid his thumb beneath the notch in the box, and flipped it open.

My heart stilled.

'Emma,' he said, his free hand still clinging mine as though I would somehow disappear. 'Will you marry me?'


	11. Witch in White

Railway Station - hell yeah, your guys' reviews make my day! I think I have two more chapters left in me after this one. That makes 13 chapters... ominous foreshadow. OoooooooooooooooOoooooOoooo.

Enjoy!

**Chapter Eleven – Witch in White**

_Crack._

The sound was like gunfire, or someone Apparating into the Great Hall.

It would have been ominous, if it weren't for the fact that it was followed by a cork flying into the air, and drowned out by raucous laughter.

'And she was so _worried_!' Hermione cackled, tears of mirth in her eyes as she wiggled her champagne flute in front of the newly-opened bottle.

Remus topped her drink; it bubbled over, but she waved her wand and the mess was gone.

'You guys took long enough,' Ron said, trying to sound grumpy, but the attempt was marred by his alcohol-induced rosy cheeks and the giant smile on his face.

Most of the dessert was almost finished – there were very few remnants left of the mousse and cheese platters and strawberries and tarts. There was not a chocolate cake to be seen, as per my request.

Dobby rushed around, thrilled to be upstairs and waiting on us. He wore a cute little tuxedo that Hermione had made for him, just for the occasion.

'You really had no idea?' Tonks said to me for the fourteenth time that night.

I shook my head. 'Harry wasn't in danger, so my visions weren't needed.'

Harry squeezed my hand under the table. We had been joined so for the entire celebration. It made eating awkward, but I was unable to let him go.

His fingers, laced in mine, rubbed against my beautiful new ring, a lovely reminder of the events of the evening. The band was a gold Celtic design, with an embedded diamond rather than a chunky one. Exquisite yet practical – I couldn't have picked anything more perfect if I'd tried. No wonder it had taken him all day to find.

Hermione caught us exchanging smiles and she sighed, her eyes slightly glazed from the bubbly. 'I'm so jealous,' she said, earning a petrified look from Ron.

'If I may be so bold,' said Dumbledore, 'I'd like to request a particular date for the wedding.'

Harry glanced at me for confirmation before nodding. 'Yeah, sure. It has to work around the uni timetable, obviously. We can't hold it in the Great Hall if it's going to be full of students.'

Dumbledore nodded. 'Indeed. I'm sure you two would like the ceremony to happen as soon as possible, so how would you feel about it being during the May new moon?'

Harry stared at him. 'The _new_ moon?'

Hermione nodded eagerly. 'Yes, yes, shedding the old life and starting anew! The new moon sounds perfect!'

I exchanged a look with Harry, who shrugged. 'Okay,' I said. 'That's fine.'

Dumbledore beamed, then rose from his chair. 'Wonderful. If you'll excuse me, I have some preparations to take care of.'

'Now?' Harry said.

Dumbledore gave a regal sigh. 'A great wizard's work is never done.' He stood behind us and placed a hand on each of our shoulders. 'Have a lovely night.'

He swept away. Ron waved at his retreating back.

Harry looked bewildered. 'I wonder what he has to do at this time of night.'

There was a brief silence, then Hagrid broke out into song, as he'd been doing all dinner. _'Hark ye, bells are ringin', lift ye' wands in cheer; love has got us singin', so let's all have a beer.'_

He raised his tankard of ale to his lips and took a swig.

Harry chuckled. 'I don't believe I've heard that particular wedding tune, Hagrid.'

Hagrid gulped down his mouthful and wiped the foam from his upper lip. 'Well I made tha' one up, didn' I?'

'Let's sing one of the real ones again,' Sirius said eagerly.

A chorus of moans from the more sober members of the table rose into the air. 'No more,' Remus said, pushing his plate away for Dobby to collect. 'I don't think I can handle another verse of your howls.'

'Come on, Lupin' Ron said. He swayed slightly in his seat. 'Don't be such a spoil sport. Sirius, which one should we do?'

Sirius stared at him through half-closed eyes, and hiccupped. 'How 'bout… Witch in the White?'

'Excellent choice!' Hagrid slapped his back, causing him to slop his beer over half the table.

Sirius stared down at the mess, surprised for a moment, then started laughing. 'You git, Haggers, old man!'

'Oops… Sorry there, Sirreeus,' Hagrid said sheepishly.

'Never mind, never mind. How'd that song start again?'

'Well… ye… er… what song did we choose?'

Harry leaned closer to me and pressed his lips against my ear. 'I'd say it might be time for our departure.'

I giggled. 'Aw, come on! It's fun watching them all drunk.'

Harry's teeth grazed my earlobe, sending shivers down my spine. 'I can think of better ways to spend this night, to be honest.'

Hell, that was enough incentive for me. 'Let's go,' I said.

We slipped away, still hand-in-hand, heading towards our favourite room, leaving the drunken men belting out a wizard wedding song.

'_Inn't she beautiful?_

_The witch in white._

_I ne'er seen_

_A more lo'erly sight_

_Inn't he lucky?_

_The man she weds_

_He smiles at her_

_The vows are said_

_They whisk off toge'er_

_As bells do chime_

_They're bonded forever_

_Through space and time.'_

xxx

It was different waking up in Harry's arms the next morning. We had both changed – the _feeling_ between us had changed. Love throbbed through my veins, as real and as true as the blood it flowed with. I leaned across Harry to reach for my shirt, which had fallen to the floor by the nightstand, trailing kisses across his chest as I did so.

He laughed – it was such a wonderful sound – and traced his fingers along my shoulder. 'Good morning, my fiancée.'

I pulled my shirt on and grinned at him. 'Good morning, my fiancé.' I held the ring up into the morning light, watching it sparkle. 'You know, I'd never really seriously considered marriage before.'

He slid one arm behind his head, watching me. 'No?' he said.

I shrugged. 'I suppose I'd always assumed I would get married to my previous boyfriend – before I found out he was cheating on me, anyway.' I tilted my head to get a better angle of the ring. 'But it was one of those things far, far in the future, you know?'

Harry took my hand from the air and kissed each of my fingers. 'Does it scare you?'

'You'd think so,' I said with a smile. 'But I dunno… I'm feeling a little reckless, considering what's coming.'

His good humour faded, and his grip on my hand tightened. 'We're going to get through this,' he said. 'Some way, somehow. I promise.'

I raised my eyebrows, impressed. 'That's quite a fighter's spirit you have there.'

He reached up and brushed back my hair. 'I have too much to lose now.'

It was with much reluctance that we got up, but I was getting my usual morning sugar craving, and Harry was keen to see how his friends had held up after their big night. As expected, Ron and Hermione looked more than a little worse for wear at the breakfast table.

'Morning,' Harry said cheerfully, settling himself beside Ron and stabbing at a plate of bacon.

'Ugnneerr,' was Ron's reply.

I sat by Hermione, who had her head in her hands. 'You all right?' I said sympathetically.

'I'm definitely going to be sick sometime soon,' she said, holding her hand over her mouth and nose from the smell of all the cooked food.

I spooned out some fresh fruit onto my plate, smothered it with yoghurt, drizzled it with honey, then sprinkled some icing sugar onto it for good measure. 'Well don't be sick anywhere near my ring,' I said.

Hermione moaned. 'No way. It took us too long to find that thing to have it ruined the next day.'

'How's Hagrid and Sirius?' Harry said, exchanging a grin with me.

'Dunno,' Hermione said. 'They were still singing by the time I passed out.'

I patted her hair. 'Maybe it was a good thing you ended up being unconscious, then. Too much of their voices would have made you deaf.'

Hermione grunted. 'Or insane.'

'Ah, I see the couple of the year are awake,' said Remus, striding over to the table and sitting on the other side of Hermione. He glanced around her at me. 'You two have a nice night?'

'Definitely the best night of my life,' I said with a smile. '_Including _the singing.'

Remus's eyebrows flew up. 'You must have had some pretty rotten nights.'

I put my spoon down. 'I have something to ask you, actually, now that you're here.'

Remus caught the seriousness of my tone, and his smile faded. 'Of course, Emma, anything. What is it?'

I ducked my head, embarrassed by the emotional display I was about to impart. 'Uh... well... I'm not sure how wizarding ceremonies work or anything, but I was wondering... um... if it's all right with you... I was wondering whether you'd like to be my acting father for the wedding.' I blushed. 'You know, to give me away, or whatever.'

There was a silence, and I was anxious enough to glance up again. I was touched to see his eyes misting. 'Oh,' he breathed. 'Yes, yes of course. I'd be honoured.'

I had to swipe a stray tear from my cheek. Remus turned away, clearing his throat as he tried to regain himself. He picked up his fork and jabbed at a sausage, deciding to concentrate on breakfast instead.

Hermione clamped her hand tighter around her mouth, and he rolled his eyes, reverting back to Professor Lupin. 'You're perfectly aware of the consequences of having too much to drink. I don't know why you insist on overdoing it.'

'We rer cebretn,' Ron mumbled into his porridge.

Remus leaned forward. 'What was that?'

'We were celebrating,' Hermione said with an exasperated moan. 'Leave us alone, all right?'

'He's always been like that.'

The five of us turned as Sirius came trotting in, looking as bright and as lively as ever. Ron stared at him in utter disbelief. 'What the hell is this?' he demanded, shocked into proper speech. 'We all feel like manure, and the one who down twenty-six mugs of beer and four glasses of champagne is totally _fine_!'

Sirius slapped him on the back in good humour. 'It's just practice, kiddo. You'll get there.'

Remus groaned. 'Please don't encourage them.'

'What?' Sirius said innocently. 'They've got to learn somehow, don't they?'

Harry lifted his goblet to his lips, trying to hide a smile. 'You two are like an old married couple.'

'So what are we up to today?' I said loudly, hoping to drown him out, or at least change the subject quickly enough for Remus or Sirius not to comprehend what he'd said.

He chuckled softly but didn't interrupt as Remus went over the lessons we'd be doing on spell deflection.

Protecting myself from oncoming hexes and jinxes was never one of my specialities. Harry was the expert – brandishing his wand and knocking away almost anything that came too close. I didn't have enough background knowledge on magic to know what I could utilise, and how to use the type of attack to my advantage. It was one of the many downfalls of having to learn everything so quickly.

However, considering spell deflection was probably one of the most important things I'd need to learn, we practiced it. And practiced it, and practiced it, and practiced it.

My slowness was more than just embarrassing, though – some of those attacks were nasty, and I'd get the full brunt of them if I didn't deflect them in time.

Harry refused to let Remus teach me anything else until we came up with a better alternative.

And, that day after our engagement party, Sirius _did_ find a more useful solution.

'Use Harry,' he said, watching us from a nearby desk as we gathered in an empty classroom.

Remus and Harry stopped mid-fight and spun to him. 'What?' Remus said.

'Use Harry,' Sirius said again. He gestured to me. 'Emma's sure to be more motivated to stop a nasty hex if he's the one in danger.'

I clutched Harry's wand so tightly that my fingernails dug into my palm. 'No,' I said.

Remus nodded. 'I have to agree with Emma. We can't risk Harry being weakened, for any reason.'

Sirius sighed and flicked his wand lazily towards Harry. _'Incarcerous.'_

'_Incendio!'_ I cried, out of instinct more than anything. I'd only learnt the spell a few weeks ago, and hadn't practiced it at all. I was surprised I'd even remembered the incantation.

But it worked – the ropes springing from Sirius's wand burst into flame, falling as charred bits of thread to the ground. Sirius's lips twitched. 'What did I tell you?'

Remus looked impressed. 'Nice reflexes, Emma.'

I lowered the wand, still staring at the remnants of the ropes in astonishment. 'I… I think my visions may have been a factor in that.'

'Because Harry was in danger, right?' Sirius said, looking triumphant. 'You knew what to do without even being consciously aware. It must be tied into your power somehow.'

Remus looked from Harry, to Sirius, to me. 'Well…' he said slowly, 'if that's the case, Emma doesn't have to _learn_ all the spells we can teach her. As long as she hears them at least once, it's in her subconscious, and she can pick them out when she requires them.'

'Sounds good to me,' Harry said.

Remus studied me as he spoke Sirius. 'How do you think she'd manage if she didn't know what was coming?'

Sirius shrugged and pointed his wand at Harry, this time without saying anything.

I yelped in alarm, shooting a shield charm up in front of him, but I was too late. Harry flew across the room and crashed into the wall. He fell to the floor, lay dazed for a moment, then sat up and scowled at Sirius. 'Um… ow,' he said in annoyance.

Sirius gave him a toothy grin. 'Sorry, mate, had to try.'

I struggled to calm my racing heart. 'Do you mind?' I yelled to Sirius. 'I'd like to have a man left to marry by the end of this.'

'Sorry, sorry.'

And so we practiced. Day after day – even when the students came back, we still trained as often as we possibly could.

To add to my growing tension as July drew nearer, I had to deal with the astonished looks of my peers when they started noticing my ring. And then, of course, the rumours started up. I remembered that during my first time at the castle, Hermione had told me that a lot of the girls were jealous. They thought Harry to be the silent, brooding hero, and so naturally they had to lash out at me when they heard the news that we were engaged.

'That's right,' I said to a couple of gawkers as I headed down the passage to the Great Hall, 'I'm a squib slave gold digger. I've seduced Harry and tricked him into thinking I love him so I get all his money.'

From beside me, Hermione giggled. I glanced at her. 'Does Harry have money?'

'His parents left him a fair bit,' she said.

Satisfied, I turned back to the two gaping girls and wiggled my ring at them. 'You snooze, you lose.'

Hermione draped her arm around me. 'Ah, Emma, you never cease to amaze me.'

'What?' I said. 'I'm sick of these people and their petty gossip. I'm trying to save the world, here. I don't have time for them.'

'They're decent enough people,' Hermione said, shooting a glance over her shoulder at the whispering pair. 'It's just that you're seeing them from a very different perspective.' She slumped her head on my shoulder. 'Have you started planning the wedding yet?'

I rolled my eyes. 'Harry _forbids_ me to leave the castle grounds, so no. And I suppose everything will have to be brought up here for me to choose.'

Hermione waved her wand, and a swirl of petals floated in front of me, spiralling down to the ground. 'Well, that's the thing about magic, see. Everything's so much easier.'

xxx

The new moon drew nearer and nearer, as did my anticipation. Something was bothering me – this strange, unnerving feeling I got whenever I thought about my wedding.

'Don't worry about it,' Hermione said when I confided in her. 'Every bride-to-be gets nervous.'

I was unconvinced.

It wasn't Harry… I didn't think. But was I stressed about tying the knot? The last few lines of Hagrid's favourite wedding song rung persistently in my ears:

_They're bonded forever_

_Through space and time._

Was that what was worrying me? Being bound to someone forever?

Yes, I loved Harry. But… for eternity? And the thing was, with magic, it was impossible to know whether the wizard songs were just being romantic, or whether they were true.

As if that wasn't bad enough, Harry sensed my anxiety and constantly started asking if I was okay, which simply added guilt to my growing cocktail of confusing emotions.

But I ploughed through the preparations, selecting food in the kitchens with an assortment of overly-helpful house elves, creating floral arrangements in the greenhouses with the Herbology professor, and designing a wedding dress with Minerva, who charmed a rippling silver-thread design down the side of an ordinary gown, and altering anything that I wanted, to make it my own. When I tried it on, Hermione got all sniffly and had to excuse herself from the room.

Harry had already picked out the wedding bands to go with my engagement ring, to save me the trouble of having to venture out of the castle grounds. He gave his to me, so I could return it during the ceremony. I took it, trying to ignore the sense of foreboding as my hand touched the metal.

Why was I getting such a bad feeling from all this? Were we rushing into things? Was I not ready? Was Harry really the one I wanted to spend the rest of my life with?

At first, I had been so sure. But May had come, and the moon was dying, and my sixth sense was practically screaming from within. Something was wrong; I knew it.

Several days before the wedding, Dumbledore addressed the student body during dinner. 'Please be aware that on the day before the new moon, all classes will be cancelled, and there will be a secure residence in Hogsmeade set up for an overnight stay. I would like for you all to enjoy your time off, as we have a special ceremony coming up – one that I'm sure most of you are already aware of.'

Murmuring passed through the Great Hall, then, slowly, eyes began turning to me and Harry. I pressed my lips together, returning their stares with defiance. Harry put his arm around my shoulders, pulling me closer to him.

'If there are any questions or issues,' Dumbledore continued, 'please see me at any time.'

He stepped down from the podium, and the murmurs became louder. Ron leaned over the table to whisper to us. 'Why did he make a big announcement?' he hissed. 'We still don't know if there are any spies around here.'

Hermione seemed entirely unconcerned. She soaked up the last of her soup with a slice of bread. 'I'm sure he has a perfectly good reason for it. Besides, we don't want all these students around during the wedding.'

'I know _I_ don't,' I said, shooting a glare at the closest staring student.

Hermione finished off her bread, humming to herself. I recognised the tune…

_Inn't she beautiful?_

_The witch in white._

_I ne'er seen_

_A more lo'erly sight_

'So Harry,' I said, trying to drown her out. 'Are you going to have a raunchy bachelor party?'

Ron looked up from his mashed potatoes in hope. 'Are you?'

Harry shook his head. 'With all the security measures, it wouldn't really be raunch-filled. We'll just have to stick to copious amounts of firewhiskey and a hangover the next day.'

_Inn't he lucky?_

_The man she weds_

'Bummer,' Ron said, looking downcast.

_He smiles at her_

_The vows are said_

I patted Harry's shoulder, hating the way my heart was now lurching in anxiety every time our eyes met. 'Sacrifices must be made for the greater good, then, huh?'

_They whisk off toge'er_

_As bells do chime_

Harry smiled and kissed my temple, causing my throat to constrict in panic. 'That's okay. There's only one girl I want.'

_They're bonded forever_

_Through space and time._

xxx

I locked the door behind me in the communal bathroom, gasping for air. I couldn't breathe – I was suffocating.

Someone knocked on the door. 'Emma? Are you okay?'

Hermione.

'I'm fine!' I called out, hoping the squeak in my voice was just my imagination. I splashed my face, and the cool water calmed the fire that seemed to dance upon my face.

'Are you sure?' Hermione said. 'You just ran from the table…'

'No – no, I'm good. Really. Must've eaten too fast or something.'

The bathroom was too small – why was the bathroom too small? Why was the _castle_ too small? I was feeling claustrophobic.

There was a pause before Hermione spoke again. 'Are you sure?' she said. 'You've been acting kind of weird recently. Harry's noticed it too.'

I shut my eyes, trying to squash the guilt and fear bubbling within me. It would be okay. I would get through this wedding, and everything would be okay. I peeked down at my ring.

Instead of calming me, the image only increased my anxiety. I moaned and looked away. This wasn't fair. Why was it suddenly so difficult?

'Emma?' Hermione said.

I stared at my reflection, hating myself infinitely for what I was going to have to do. With a deep breath, I turned and opened the bathroom door a crack. 'Hermione,' I said quietly. 'I can't go through with this wedding.'

The moment the final word died on my lips, I burst into sobs. It hurt to even say. And _how_ was I supposed to tell Harry?

Hermione's face was fixed in horror. She stared at me through the gap of the door, obviously struggling to comprehend what I'd said. 'Wh-wh-why not?' she stuttered.

'I don't know,' I said between tears. 'I don't know what's going on with me.'

Hermione reached in and patted my wrist. 'Everyone goes through this. Really.'

I gave a watery choke. 'No. No, this doesn't feel right. Something about this wedding is freaking me out, and I just… I can't do it. I'm so sorry.'

To my astonishment, Hermione's expression changed to relief. 'Oh. So… so you have a bad feeling about the _wedding_?' I nodded. 'But not about Harry?' I shook my head. Hermione gently pushed me back and slipped into the bathroom, closing the door behind her. 'That, we can deal with.'

I wiped my cheeks. 'We can?'

'Absolutely.' Hermione leant against one of the sinks and smiled. 'Tell me exactly what's been going on in that head of yours.'

I told her about my terrible sense of anxiety and panic, which was growing every time the wedding was mentioned. I explained how I still loved Harry, more than anything, and I didn't want to hurt him. Then I bowed my head and admitted quietly that maybe I just wasn't ready to get married.

'I think you are,' Hermione said when I'd finished. 'Why else would you have said yes when he proposed?'

I shrugged, dabbing at my still-leaking eyes. 'I dunno. He had gone to all this trouble, and the candles were all romantic and stuff, and I was so glad to see him after he'd been away all day, and… and…'

'There's still a chance one of you won't make it through the final fight,' Hermione finished.

I nodded, sniffling. 'Is that really awful of me?' I couldn't meet her gaze. 'I mean, I must be such a rotten person to use that as a way out.'

'It's not a way out if you wed in a wizard ceremony,' Hermione said. 'When the vows say forever, they mean _forever_.'

'I think this all started when I realised that,' I said. 'It's just… in the human world, you can get divorced. Marriage isn't the be-all, end-all.'

Hermione examined me for a moment, then stepped forward and clasped my hands in hers. 'If you want my opinion,' she said, 'I believe you're dying to marry Harry. I believe that your life – and his – will be better when you're bound. I believe getting married is the answer to your happiness.'

I made a face. 'How on earth did you come to that conclusion from what I just told you?'

She smiled. 'Because I can see it in your eyes. Harry's too. He's taken many hits for you, and you've done the same for him. He'd give up his wand for you, Emma, and that's huge. If he gives up his wand, the protection his mother placed upon him with her death will be gone. I truly believe you two are destined to be together.'

I swallowed hard and blinked back tears. 'If that's the case,' I said shakily, 'then why do I feel so scared about getting married to him?'

Hermione's raised her eyebrows. 'What are you really afraid of? Getting married, or having a wedding?'

I stared at her. 'Er… aren't they the same thing?'

'No, they're not.' She released my hands. 'Don't talk to Harry about this until you've had a good, long think about it.' She opened the door waltzed out of the bathroom, singing beneath her breath.

'_They whisk off toge'er_

_As bells do chime_

_They're bonded forever_

_Through space and time.'_

The words rung around and around my mind, cheerfully, torturously. I didn't understand what Hermione was trying to tell me. I avoided Harry for the rest of the night while trying to work out her cryptic message. To me, she sounded crazy, and I didn't have time for crazy. I trusted my instincts too much, and they were telling me that I was making the wrong decision.

The wedding was only days away. If things still didn't feel better soon, I was going to have to call it off.


	12. Magic

**Chapter Twelve – Magic**

It pained me to avoid Harry, especially so close to the wedding, but I didn't give myself a choice. If I saw him alone for long enough, I would have to tell him my fears, and I'd promised Hermione that I'd give myself some more time before I went down that path.

Every breath seemed to hurt – like razors against my lungs. I didn't want… I didn't want to do this to him. I didn't want to do this to _us_.

I just couldn't understand why my premonitions were being so cruel.

The bridal party and most members of the Order sat down to supper in the Room of Requirement on the eve of our wedding night, away from the students in the Great Hall. Everyone was loud and laughing, except for Harry and I. Sirius and Hagrid started on the ale again, and I knew I'd have to escape before they began singing.

The entire Weasley family arrived later on, bringing sweets and gifts and plenty of kisses. Fred – or George – aimed for my lips, but I moved my head just in time, and he caught my cheek instead.

'Nice try,' I said, giving him a playful punch on the shoulder and sitting back in my seat.

The Weasleys bustled down to the other side of the table, greeting everyone as they passed.

A shadow of a smile flickered across Harry's face as he turned to me, but it vanished when he saw my guilty expression. I felt just awful for him – he'd been trying so hard with me these past few days, and I had remained distant. Cold.

'Pass the mint sauce, would you?' Ron said from the other side of me, completely oblivious to the growing tension.

I obliged him, at the same time shying away as Harry tried to brush my hair from my neck. Hermione glowered at me from across the table. _Stop it_, she mouthed.

I shook my head. She didn't understand. No one understood. My visions had never led me wrong before. I relied on my sixth sense to keep me, and Harry, alive. Now this sixth sense was telling me that the wedding tomorrow was wrong, and I had to trust that.

Cutlery scraped across the china plates as dinner was polished off. Hagrid burped, then gave a jovial laugh that rumbled across the table. 'So, Sirius, shall we have another sing-along, then?'

I looked to Remus for support, but he simply chuckled at the two. 'Maybe we'll all join in this time. It's much more bearable this way.'

He must have had a bit too much to drink, as well.

Hastily, I got out of my chair. 'I… need to go to the bathroom.'

The others barely heard me as I slipped out of the room and into the cooler air of the castle passageway. I closed the door as a melody started up. I couldn't deal with the cheerfulness of it all – not now.

I hugged myself and started down the hall, tears prickling at my eyes. I sniffled and bowed my head. My heart screamed out that loved Harry. It _knew_ I did. I just wish I understood what was going on in my stupid mind.

I'd only made it a few steps before someone spoke behind me.

'Hey.'

His voice still had that wonderful effect on my body. My skin prickled, and my heart flourished with new light.

But I didn't turn around.

'Hey,' I muttered.

I heard him draw in a shaky breath. 'Nervous?'

I didn't know how to answer that, so I kept my mouth shut.

When he couldn't stand the silence anymore, he spoke again. 'Emma, talk to me. Tell me what's going on with you.'

'I can't,' I said, and my voice cracked with emotion. The tears spilled down my cheeks.

I sensed Harry move towards me, until he was pressed against my back. 'Why not? I thought we told each other everything.'

My chest shuddered. 'Y-yes,' I whispered. 'But if I told you everything, I'd have to tell you that we can't get married tomorrow, and that would destroy me.'

I covered my face and broke down, unable to handle the sadness of it all, unable to understand why such terrible things could happen to us when we'd already been through so much.

'What are you talking about?' Harry said.

I struggled to explain through my sobs, still not able to turn to him. 'H-Harry, I love you. M-more than anything. But I h-have an awful f-feeling about tomorrow –'

'About us, or about tomorrow?'

'About tomorrow.'

'So it's not actually about the wedding?'

'Yes! Yes, it – it is. I felt it when the guys sung their stupid wedding songs. And I feel it whenever I look at my engagement ring, or hold your wedding band in my fingers.' Finally, I found the courage to turn to him. He was staring at me in a combination of puzzlement and disbelief. I didn't know how to make him understand. 'Something about this wedding is bad, Harry. I can feel it.'

Harry's mixed emotions changed to a frown. 'Can you be a little more specific?'

I shook my head, swallowing to try and dislodge the ever-increasing lump in my throat. 'I'm sorry. I don't know what's going to happen. You have to understand –'

'Understand?' Harry looked away, laughing dryly. 'You want me to understand? How can you ask me to do that, when you're cancelling our wedding?'

'I'm so sorry –'

'No,' Harry said, and he seemed angry. 'Tell me you're scared, tell me you're nervous, but don't tell me you're _sorry_.' He spun, taking a few paces away from me before turning back. 'God, how long have you been hiding this from me? And, more importantly, how long were you planning on stringing it out? I mean, were you just not going to show up tomorrow?'

'H-Harry –'

'Or maybe you were going to make it to the altar,' Harry said bitterly. 'Maybe you were going to walk all the way down the aisle, and _then_ tell me this was a bad idea.'

'It's not like that –'

'I thought we trusted each other,' Harry said. His mood switched again, and he looked down on me in disgust. 'So much for that theory.'

'Please,' I choked. 'Please, I never wanted to hurt you.'

He moved back to me, gripping my shoulders. 'Then don't. Whatever this bad feeling is, we can work through it together.'

'I – I don't know how –'

'We'll figure something out.' He sounded desperate. 'Please, Emma. Please. I love you.'

Why did he have to make it so hard for me? I bowed my head, unable to look at him as I slipped off my engagement ring. 'I'm sorry,' I whispered.

I wish I hadn't glanced up at him. I wish I hadn't seen the expression on his face as he felt the ring press against his palm.

Now I knew what a broken heart looked like.

xxx

'Need some company?'

I glanced up from my spot, squinting into the darkness, but didn't reply. Dumbledore didn't seem to need one. He settled beside me on the grass with a sigh, gazing out over the lake. 'My dear Emma. Have you been out here all night?'

'Don't start,' I said, pulling my knees up to my chest. 'I've cried enough.'

'Yes, I can imagine such an event is a cause for tears.' He paused, contemplating on something silently before speaking again. 'Another event common for tears is weddings. I must admit, I myself have been quite overcome with emotion during ceremonies.'

'Oh, please stop,' I whispered, turning my face away, pressing my cheek to my knees. 'I don't want to think about weddings. Ever, ever again.'

He fell silent. A breeze ruffled the grass around us, rippling the lake and causing the trees to rustle like waves. It was not as black at it had been a few minutes ago – the sky was becoming grey, and the stars were slowly fading. Sunrise was nearly upon us.

I shivered, wrapping Harry's coat tighter around myself. His scent swum around me, both comforting and tormenting at the same time. I had never known such pain.

'You must love him, Emma,' Dumbledore said at last.

I stared at nothing, my throat dry. 'More than you will ever understand.'

'Then why do you not want to get married?'

Fresh tears sprung to my eyes. 'I trust my intuition,' I said, my voice shaking.

'Oh? And what is your intuition saying now?'

'I don't know. It's being drowned out by my heart.'

'Ah.' Dumbledore shifted beside me. 'So what is your heart saying?'

A sob left my lips. 'That I would like nothing more than to crawl to Harry and beg him to take me back.'

There was a pause. 'I doubt you would need to crawl,' Dumbledore said. 'He wants to be with you as much as you want to be with him.'

'But… it's… dangerous.'

'Is it?'

I lifted my head, turning to him. 'What do you mean?'

'Emma, please listen to your intuition. I know it's hard to hear over your heart, but not impossible.'

I sucked in a breath of fresh night air, and closed my eyes. The internal grief was torturous to sift through. Every part of me was aching. My left finger felt bare, and my soul felt hollow. The empty echo of my heart was shrieking.

'I can't,' I croaked. 'I can't tell. I feel… I feel horrible.'

'How do you know that's not your intuition?'

I threw up my hands. 'Because that would mean my intuition is completely confused! I _know_ I can't marry Harry.'

Dumbledore placed his hand on my arm. 'Why? Why do you know that?'

'Because… because it didn't feel right! Every time I thought about the wedding –'

'The wedding?'

'Am I talking to myself, here? Yes, the wedding!'

'So you have no bad feelings about Harry?' Dumbledore said. '_Just_ the wedding?'

I was losing my temper. 'What difference does it make? It still means I shouldn't marry Harry.'

'Does it?'

I rolled my eyes and turned away from him. I hated cryptic.

We were silent again. I refused to talk, seething about my stupid situation and hating how everyone seemed to think they knew what was going on.

Dumbledore was completely at ease. In fact, he was humming. Bloody humming.

I gritted my teeth, forcing myself not to snap. It would hardly be right for me to tell one of the most powerful wizards in the world to sod off.

I soon found reason to change my mind on that, however. After a few moments, I recognised what he was humming.

The wedding song. The damn wedding song that Sirius and Hagrid had sung on our engagement night.

Was he _trying_ to make me insane?

'I'd like to be alone,' I said through my teeth.

'Very well,' Dumbledore said. He rose fluidly, much more agile than I had expected. 'Try to get some rest.' He ambled away, still humming.

I wanted to ditch a rock after him. The nerve of that man! After everything I'd been through. He must be getting senile. Maybe he had no idea of the gravity of the situation. Maybe he was insane, and nobody realised.

How could he not understand how much this was killing me? Why did everyone assume that I was being rash, when clearly I loved Harry more than anything?

I frowned. It was true. I loved Harry more than anything.

So why wasn't I marrying him?

And then Dumbledore's words finally hit me. It was a lot like what Hermione had been trying to tell me.

I had a bad feeling about the wedding. Not Harry. _The wedding._

I gasped, jolting upright. The answer came to me, as quickly and as clearly as if I'd seen it with my own eyes. Oh good lord, how stupid had I been?

A cry escaped me as I scrambled to my feet, my heart pounding against my ribcage. I raced up the slope. I couldn't see Dumbledore anywhere – had he already managed to get inside? He was faster than he looked.

And he definitely, definitely wasn't senile.

I flung myself back into the castle, flying down the passageway, every breath like fire in my lungs. My feet barely touched the ground. The halls were getting brighter as the sun began to rise.

I used my power, my Sight, my gift, to find Harry. I knew he'd been in the Room of Requirement.

I sprinted up the stairs, all the way to one of the upper floors. Hermione and Ron were sitting outside the doorway, looking exhausted. Hermione jumped up when she saw me. 'Emma!'

'Let me in,' I wheezed. 'I need to speak to Harry.'

Ron got up too, but he held his arms out in front of the door. 'No,' he hissed. 'He's finally gotten to sleep.'

Hermione pursed her lips. 'He was in a pretty bad state.'

'Yeah, no kidding, so was I. Let me in, guys!'

Hermione hesitated. 'That might not be such a good idea…'

I shot her a glare. 'How am I supposed to marry him if you won't even let me in?'

'Marry him?' Ron choked. 'Are you kidding? What are you trying to do to the poor bloke?'

But Hermione was beaming, looking utterly thrilled. 'The wedding's back on?'

'Yes,' I said, still huffing. 'The premonition I was having wasn't about the wedding – it was about what was going to happen _during_ the wedding! Voldermort's going to attack. The big fight is going to be _today_.'

'What?' Ron cried.

I spun to Hermione. 'Go and wake everyone from the Order up. We'll make this wedding earlier, before dusk, so hopefully it doesn't happen during the ceremony. The students should be out of here just after breakfast, so they're safe. Ron, go down and get Hagrid. Tell him what's going on, and make sure he's ready to fight '

Ron stared at me. 'Are you bloody joking?'

'Does it look like I'm joking?'

Hermione lunged forward, giving me a mighty hug. 'Oh, I'm excited and utterly terrified all that the same time!'

I hugged back, but released her swiftly. 'Please let me in to see Harry.'

Hermione stepped aside and unlocked the handle with her wand. 'No problem.'

She swung the door opened. I stepped inside, and she shut it behind me. I stood in the darkness, waiting for my eyes to adjust. It wasn't the dining room from the night before. It was the bedroom – _our_ bedroom. Our sanctuary.

I stepped carefully over to the window and drew back the drapes. The sun was peeking over the horizon now, spilling pink light into the room.

I turned, my heart aching in sorrow when my eyes landed Harry, fast asleep, though he hardly looked peaceful. There was a crease in his brow, and stubble across his jaw. His eyelids were a pale red, contrasting the dark rings beneath. He was still in his clothes, dishevelled and untidy.

I sunk down, perching myself on the bed beside him and sweeping the back of my fingers across his forehead. 'Harry.'

He stirred, but didn't open his eyes.

I leant down, brushing my lips against his. They were dry and cracked, but they still tasted like him. 'Harry,' I whispered against his mouth.

Slowly, he woke, blinking up at me like he didn't believe what he was seeing. 'E-Emma?'

I nuzzled the side of his nose. 'Harry, if it's all right with you, will you marry me today?'

He exhaled, still half-asleep. 'Tell me I'm not dreaming.'

I kissed him again. 'You're not dreaming. Want me to prove it to you?'

xxx

Part of me was on a high as I left the Room of Requirement. I had my ring back on – my hand and heart felt complete again.

The other part of me was struggling not to panic. The final battle was today. _Today_.

If there was anything I wanted to do more in the world, it was make sure Harry and I were married before Voldermort attacked.

When I finally made it to the Great Hall, the tables had been cleared away and most of the Order were about, making preparations.

Hermione was in the middle of draping silk along points on the walls using magic, when she turned and saw me. 'Out!' she said shrilly, keeping her wand pointed at the silk. 'Out, out, out!'

Minerva approached and gripped my arm. 'Come along. You need to start getting ready.'

She tried to lead me away, but I stayed firmly in my place. 'Where's Dumbledore? Is he happy to start the ceremony early?'

'He's gone to get his robes and the fasting rope from the Ministry of Magic,' Hermione said, her attention back on her task.

'Fasting rope?' I said.

Minerva planted her hands on my back and literally pushed me out of the hall. 'Come along.'

We bumped into Tonks on the way out. She grinned. 'Wotcher.'

'Hi,' I said. 'What have you been up to?'

'Getting the students down to Hogsmeade.' She nodded to Minerva. 'All there, safe and sound.'

'Good. Keep moving, Emma. We've got a lot to do.'

She led me to a grand bathroom, with marble walls and a white-tiled floor. Candles flickered around the room, smelling like vanilla. I stared at the place in astonishment. 'Wow.'

Minerva led me over to the bath – which closely resembled a swimming pool – and started all the taps. 'Bubbles come out of this one, heat out of this one, champagne out of this one,' she said. 'Relax in here while I set up a place to do your hair and make up.'

I grinned. 'That, I can do.'

She pointed to a white robe hanging from the wall beside a huge fluffy towel. 'Put that on when you finished, and I'll come get you.'

She disappeared through a little green door on the other side of the bathroom.

I stared after her for a moment, then turned to the bath, watching the hot water and bubbles gush from the tap. 'Now this I can get used to.'

I'd always felt rather bored in baths – I was an action person, not a sit-down-and-do-nothing person, but I had to admit, _this_ bath was something else. There was a cabinet at the base of the taps that had champagne flutes. And strawberries. And little chocolates.

I sat back, allowing the warm water to ease out the tension in my muscles. The steam rose in spirals and waves, drifting about my face and plastering my hair to the back of my neck.

If I was going to die during the battle, this is definitely how I wanted to spend my last day.

Even in the mother of all baths, though, the boredom got to me eventually. A few glasses of champagne had been downed, the chocolates had been eaten, and all that was left of the strawberries were their hulls.

I got out, drying myself with the fluffy towel. That in itself was a pleasure experience – the material was fresher than any new towel I'd ever bought. And the robe was smooth, furry heaven.

There was a quiet knock from the little green door, and Minerva appeared. 'Ready?'

I nodded, padding after her into a cute saloon, with a vanity dresser filled with various potions and vials, and a big, cushy swivel chair.

I settled in the chair, and Minerva immediately started to work. She grabbed a little purple bottle from the vanity and squeezed out a white liquid, lathering copious amounts into my hair. It smelled like jasmines. As soon as it had dried, she waved her wand around my head, working her magic.

Hermione joined us while she was still styling. 'Hi,' she said, bouncing over to me. 'How are you?'

I gave a wobbly smile. 'About the wedding? I have butterflies – the good kind, not the bad kind. About the fight…'

Hermione sucked in a breath when I trailed off, then shook her head. 'No. Don't think about the fight. You'll both be fine, and we'll all be there. Where's Harry?'

'Sleeping,' I said. 'He needs to rest.' I hesitated. 'I haven't told him about Voldermort yet.'

'Good,' said Minerva. 'He doesn't need to know. Let him be happy for this ceremony.'

Hermione nodded. 'That's fair. Okay, I've got to get back to work. We may be magical, but there's still lots to be done.'

She dashed away, and I sat back in the cushy chair, trying to relax. It was hard when I knew what was coming ahead.

'Read something,' Minerva said, as though guessing what I was thinking. She gestured to a book on the vanity, which was hiding between the potions. I picked it up – _The Witch's Guide to the Perfect Wedding._

'It'll give you an idea of what to expect during the ceremony,' Minerva said, as I started to flip through.

It was certainly detailed. It explained that Harry and my hands would be bound by fasting rope, magically joining us at the end of the ceremony. Other than that, the major parts of the wedding seemed like an ordinary ritual. Of course, there was the occasional line in the book that reminded me how different our worlds were: _Be practical_, the book said. _While it's elegant and beautiful to have fairies dancing down the aisle before your walk, they leave a lot of glittering dust in their wake, which can be a potential slipping hazard, or affect one of your own glamour spells with disastrous consequences._

I had to snort at that one. Fairies? Glittering dust? I had a feeling I'd never get fully used to magic.

Minerva finished and swivelled me around to face the vanity. My hair had been piled up in a loose bun, with pearls threaded through. Styled curls hung at perfect places around my face and neck.

I admired the effect. 'I don't think my hair's ever looked this good.'

'Of course not, dear,' Minerva said absently, fixing a curl that wasn't sitting right with her wand. 'You've never had it done with magic before.'

She started on my make up, spreading a cream across my face that left my skin dewy and glowing. Plus, I sparkled when I turned my head in certain light. My lashes were thickened and curled without a hint of mascara, and my eyelids were studded with tiny gems embedded within the eye shadow. She swiped a colourful gloss across my lips before standing back to survey her work. She gave a short nod of approval. 'That will do.'

I grinned. 'I feel a bit like Cinderella.'

'Cinder-who?'

'Never mind.'

She did my nails, turning them shell-pink with a flick of her wand, and giving each intricate Celtic designs that matched my engagement ring.

Hermione returned as Minerva was finishing up. She gasped when she saw my hair and make up. 'Can you make me look like that, Professor?'

Minerva surveyed her sternly. 'Considering she's the bride, I don't think we should out-do her.'

Hermione giggled sheepishly. 'Right.'

I got up out of the chair, relinquishing it to my Maid of Honour, and my only bridesmaid. 'All yours.'

Hermione hopped into the chair, looking excited. Minerva pointed her wand in the direction of another door – this one smaller, and painted red. 'Your dress is through there. Give me a call when you're doing it up.'

'I've changed my mind,' I said. 'I'm not Cinderella, I'm Alice in Wonderland.' I left the two and ducked into the next room, where my dress was hanging on a mannequin, waiting to be worn. I admired it once more before pulling it off and tugging it up my body. The top was like a corset, with no sleeves and laces at the back. The bottom poofed out, just a bit, and ended before the floor so I wouldn't trip over it. I had cute white heels to go with the dress, which I now regretted. Fighting Voldermort in heels was not the smartest of ideas. When I called Minerva in, I had her take out the height of the shoes with her wand. She pulled tight the laces of my dress until I couldn't breathe. Hermione poked her head in, hair only half-done in a braid. Her eyes widened when she saw me. 'Merlin, your boobs look fantastic.'

I flicked a stray curl from my neck. 'That's the point.'

Her expression softened. 'And you look gorgeous.'

'I'd better,' I said. 'If I die today, I want to look my best.'

'Everything's going to be fine,' she said, and she sounded so convinced that I couldn't help but almost believe her.

xxx

'Where is he?'

I paced back and forth by the entrance of the Great Hall, making sure I still kept just out of sight of those inside.

Remus, Tonks, Ron and Hermione watched me silently. At last, Remus caught my arm, unable to stand it anymore. 'Stop worrying – he'll be here soon.'

I gestured to one of the windows, where the sky was glowing red and orange. 'He's late. The sun's almost setting.' My voice rose a pitch. 'We can't exactly start without him!'

'He'll be here.'

'You keep saying that, but I don't –'

'Everything okay out here?' Sirius asked, hurrying out of the Great Hall.

Remus nodded. 'Still waiting on Albus. How's Harry?'

'Getting anxious. He wants to see Emma.'

'No!' Hermione said, stepping in. 'Those two have had as much bad luck as they can handle. Let's not tempt fate now. The groom will _not_ be seeing the bride before the wedding.'

Sirius stopped as my appearance registered in his brain. A smile blossomed across his face. 'Well. Don't you look beautiful.'

I blushed. 'Thanks.'

Tonks ushered him back towards the Great Hall. 'Get in there and sit down.'

'And tell Harry to be patient,' Hermione said as he disappeared. She turned to Tonks. 'You know, it's not too late to be a bridesmaid.' She smoothed down her pretty outfit. 'Professor McGonagall could whip up a dress for you in no time.'

Tonks made a face. 'I don't do pink. Or weddings.' She pointed her wand, miming an attack stance. 'I'm just here for the fight.' She remembered me and grinned guiltily. 'And Emma, of course.'

I twisted my engagement ring around on my finger. My panic was growing with every moment. 'I want to see Harry.'

'I know you do,' said Ron, 'but Dumbledore will be here any mo– oh, what do you know?'

Dumbledore hurried up, wearing long red robes, and holding a velvet rope. 'I beg your forgiveness, everyone,' he said. 'You know what the Ministry is like with bureaucracy and queues.'

'I sure do,' Tonks muttered.

Dumbledore smiled at me. 'Hello, Emma.'

There was much tenderness in his voice, and I regretted my angry thoughts towards him in the early hours of the morning. 'Hello,' I said, ducking my head in shame.

'You look lovely.'

'Thank you.'

I still couldn't look up at him, but I hoped he caught the tone of my voice. There was plenty more than just the compliment that I had to thank him for.

'Well,' he said, 'shall we begin?'

I nodded along with everyone else, and he bustled towards the Great Hall. I could hear the murmuring and relief from the people within when he entered. I exhaled slowly, although it was very hard to do any kind of breathing in my dress. 'Let's do this as quickly as possible,' I said.

'Gotchya,' Ron said. 'No dawdling for us.'

He and Hermione linked elbows, and disappeared around the corner with blessed speed. I swallowed hard as Remus took my arm. 'You ready?' he said.

I used my free hand to squeeze his fingers. 'Depends on what happens next.'

I shook with each step, feeling a twinge of performance anxiety as we moved towards the entrance of the hall. I could hear music – tiny blue-glowing creatures above us were singing. They sounded like a choir of angels.

We rounded the corner, and I almost stopped in my tracks, overcome with awe. The place was unrecognisable. Silk draped every wall, fastened with large bows and bouquets. While candles floated high above our heads, radiating warmth and the scent of musk. Several pews filled the front of the hall, decorated with lace and lilies, and filled with every member of the Order, who had stood for my walk down the aisle. They all smiled at me, but I was so nervous, I could barely focus on them. Hagrid stood out the most – he was standing closest to me, before a large felled log from the forest. He looked like he was about to burst into tears, and was clutching at a red and white polka-dotted handkerchief.

Hermione and Ron were ahead of us. They reached the altar, parting in front of Dumbledore. Hermione went to the left, Ron went to the right…

My eyes landed on Harry. Downright gorgeous in a tux. Hair still dishevelled, but in a handsome way. Eyes fixed on me.

Waiting.

The air left the room. I thought my corset-top had finally restricted my breathing and choked me to death, but then I realised the sound had stopped too, and my skin was prickling.

It wasn't death-by-corset – it was pure, undiluted happiness.

(Although the corset was still suffocating me somewhat.)

I smiled, joy radiating from within and bursting out, until I could feel it blazing around me. I was half-surprised that I wasn't glowing. Tears sprung to my eyes. This must be what heaven felt like.

We were really getting married. I was really going to be Harry's wife. This was really happening.

I was tempted to just run the rest of the way down the aisle, so I could throw myself in his arms, but I managed to restrain myself. Barely.

I clung to Remus, letting him guide my pace.

The walk took much too long, but when I finally reached the altar it was worth it. Remus kissed my cheek and took a seat in the pew behind me. I stepped up on the altar, unsure what was going to happen. We hadn't even had a rehearsal.

But Dumbledore knew what to do – he gestured for us to hold hands.

Harry laced his fingers through mine, his gaze drifting to my chest. 'Nice dress,' he murmured.

I laughed softly, and the action caused a tear to slide down my cheek. 'We're getting married, and that's the first thing you say?'

His eyes returned to mine, all humour vanishing. 'There are no words to express what I'm really feeling right now.'

I squeezed his hands. 'Same here.'

Dumbledore began the ceremony. The rest of the world faded away. I gazed into Harry's eyes, lost within their green depths. I barely heard Dumbledore's speech, though I caught mentions of unbreakable unity throughout all the universe. My heart lifted and my fear vanished, leaving without a trace. I realised then that, more than anything in the world, I wanted to be bound to Harry. He was already in my heart, sharing his magic, completing my soul. Marrying him was just the next step.

Harry and I exchanged rings. I hadn't written any vows – I copied what Dumbledore said, promising Harry my heart and soul, and receiving his in return.

Dumbledore raised his wand, and the velvet fasting rope by our feet lifted, snaking its way around our wrists and tying us together.

'Now,' Dumbledore said, cupping our joined hands. His eyes were shimmering with tears, but then, so were mine and Harry's. 'A final kiss to seal this union –'

A deafening crash cut him off, and one side of the wall exploded, sending stones and glass blasting into the Great Hall. Harry lunged forward, throwing me to the ground. My head slammed against the floor. I could hear screams, and my heart ached in panic as I wondered how many of my precious friends had just been injured… or worse.

Harry covered me from the flying debris, ducking his head as a large slab of concrete soared over us.

The noise soon settled, although remnants of the wall continued to crack and crumble. I strained my ears to listen for any signs of the Order, but there was nothing.

Harry remained above me. I could feel him trembling. He didn't move - I wondered if he'd gone into shock.

I twisted beneath him, craning my neck to see what had happened. Relief washed through me when I saw that most members of the Order were up, standing along the opposite unbroken wall, their wands raised.

But my relief was short-lived as my gaze slid to the other side of the hall. There was a giant hole in the wall, framing a mob of black-cloaked wizards, who were silhouetted in the last rays of sunlight.

And in the centre, right at the front, was the snake-like demon that had haunted my dreams since my night in the caves.

Voldermort raised his wand as caught sight of Harry. His attention lingered on him for a second, before his eyes shifted to me. His lips stretched into a vile leer.

'Isn't she beautiful; the witch in white.'


	13. The Key

Last chapter!

Railway Station - Hell yeah, the suffering-for-love Harry is my favourite kind :hearts:

**Chapter Thirteen – The Key**

I stared at the demon before me, my mouth agape, my fingers clutching Harry's shirt. He was heavy and solid above me, still alive, still breathing.

I prayed that he would stay that way.

I reached up, ripping his wand from his inner jacket pocket. Voldermort attacked just as Harry's hand joined mine around the warm wood.

'_Protego!'_

'_Crucio!'_

Our shield exploded in front of us before the curse was even sent, and we were safely protected.

'Go!' Remus cried, and suddenly there was chaos – the members of the Order versus the black-cloaked wizards. Spells whizzed across the hall, shattering candles and blasting into pews. Harry shifted, pulling me up as he got to his feet. We kept our shield going as Voldermort strode towards us.

'He didn't go for the kill,' Harry said under his breath. 'Why didn't he use the Killing Curse?'

I didn't know how to answer him. My throat and mouth were too dry; too filled with dust. My hand was sweaty around the wand, and my legs were trembling, threatening to crumble beneath me. I had a feeling that it was only Harry's free arm, which was wrapped tightly around my waist, that was keeping me up.

The severity of the situation had finally hit. I thought I was ready. I thought I was prepared. Now, though, face-to-face with Voldermort, I didn't feel ready. I felt like a little child.

'Don't let go of me.'

I was surprise to hear my voice. I didn't remember speaking. I sounded small; pathetic.

Harry tightened his grip. 'It's okay,' he said in my ear. 'We're going to get through this.'

I choked a sob. 'How? How, Harry? How are we supposed to beat the strongest wizard in the world?'

'Because together, we're stronger.'

Voldermort drew his wand up, almost casually. Harry dropped our arms, so the shield charm fell. Around us, a battle raged, and the Great Hall crumbled piece by piece. I couldn't even register it. All I saw was the evil man before us.

He sauntered forward slightly, smirking. I felt Harry tense behind me. I couldn't do this. My reflexes were shot from fright.

My only consolation was that Harry had been training for this his entire life. His arm around me felt strong and confident. I had to believe he knew what he was doing.

Voldermort moved – his hand flicked forward so fast that I barely saw it. Harry reacted just as swiftly. He lifted his wand, and I lost my grip in the process.

It didn't matter. Whatever it was – whatever unspoken spell Voldermort had thrown our way – was deflected automatically.

It didn't stop there. Voldermort threw attack after attack to us. Harry worked hard to keep them away. He brow was furrowed in concentration, and his grip on me began loosen.

I tried to clear my mind. I had to think of a way out of this. I had to have some sort of vision or knowledge that would help us through.

Every spell that shot past, every _crack_ from a clash of magic, had me cringing. It was the middle of a goddam war, how was I supposed to focus?

A flash of red caught my eye. Dumbledore whipped his wand towards a crowd of Death Eaters advancing on Remus and Sirius, and the cloaked men went flying across the room. Remus nodded towards him in acknowledgement. 'Thanks, Albus.'

Dumbledore spun to me. 'The end!' he cried, before twisting to protect himself from a stray jinx.

I stared at him. Had he really just said _the end_? Was this it? Was this all that was left?

Voldermort sent an ominous black streak of light towards us. I flinched in terror, but Harry must have been prepared for that particular curse, because he drew his wand up sharply, and the black light shot out in four different directions, twisting and morphing until they became crows, which cawed and flapped towards us.

I ducked my head with a shriek, but they soared high into the air and flew out of the gaping hole. The sun had set – twilight was fast approaching.

Sirius suddenly glanced over at us, and his eyes widened in panic. 'Harry, behind you!'

Harry turned, but it was too late. Malfoy had crept up behind us, on the altar, his hood down to reveal the malicious look on his face. _'Stupefy!'_

I had felt the effect of the spell before, but it was nothing like this. I keeled over, as if I'd taken a huge blow to the stomach, then flew back, colliding heavily with the wall on the far end. The world tilted sickeningly as my skull cracked against stone, and I slumped to the floor. I lay, stunned, bile rising in my throat. My head throbbed; my mind screamed in pain.

I didn't even have to see to know Harry was not with me. I couldn't feel his presence – he had landed somewhere else. I hardly had the courage to look up. Defenceless, wandless, useless.

'_Accio, Harry's heart.'_

I hadn't even regained my bearings before I was flying through the air again, this time as though I was being pulled by a powerful rope. The wind rushed from my lungs as I hit something hard and cold.

Voldermort.

I choked a sob, close to vomiting. His gnarled fingers gripped my chin as his slitted red eyes bored into mine. 'She's pretty,' he rasped. 'But not spectacular. I don't see what the big deal is.' He tilted his head, studying me. 'Let's find out, shall we?'

Despite being barely conscious, I closed my eyes and shut my mind, determined more than anything to keep him out.

But his free hand grasped the top of my head, and suddenly my skull was burning. I screamed; it was like a snake of fire had slithered through my scalp and right into my mind, coiling and twisting within my brain, taking whatever thoughts it needed. I had never felt such agony; never wished so much for the release of death. My throat was raw from shrieking, but the pain wouldn't let me stop. Even if he let me go, I would be nothing but a hollowed, charred shell –

Then the pain was gone, and I was facedown on the ground, sobbing and shivering. The scorched path of the fire-serpent slowly ebbed, leaving an ache in my mind. He had taken everything. He knew everything I knew.

I lifted my head, unable to understand why I had been freed.

My eyes landed upon something on the stone ground. Something that should not be there.

Harry's wand.

'No,' I whispered, before I'd even truly registered what it meant. I raised my gaze to find Harry standing behind it, his body trembling and tears tracking his face.

'I'm sorry,' he said to me, his chest wracking with painful breaths. 'I couldn't let him hurt you any more…'

My heart plummeted in dread. He'd given up his wand. He was no longer protected from the Killing Curse.

'Good boy,' Voldermort said from above me. He snarled. 'I know now. I know about the third prophecy. I know that if I kill one of you alone, the other will somehow defeat me.' My body jerked as a powerful magic force lifted me from the ground and threw me, once more, through the air. I barrelled into Harry, and we crumpled to the ground.

'So,' Voldermort said, striding towards us, 'I'm going to have to kill you and your filthy muggle lover together.'

xxx

My mind was numb, still throbbing from the fire assault. My fingers found Harry's shirt, and I clung to him again, trying to blink away my jarred vision. He grasped my hand, prying me away.

It hurt – I didn't understand what he was doing – but he rolled me off him and shifted so he was before me, once again protecting me.

I lay back, struggling to stop the spinning in my mind. _I_ was supposed to be the protector, not him. Why couldn't I do this? Why weren't my visions helping me?

Voldermort directed his wand towards us, and Harry flinched, but a voice distracted both of them.

'_Stupefy!'_

Voldermort spun to deflect Remus's spell – which wasn't nearly as strong as it should be, seeing he was using someone else's wand – and Harry seized his chance. He scrambled forward, lunging out to take his wand back while Voldermort threw a silent curse to Remus. I watched, mouth open in horror as blood splattered my vision, and Remus fell.

Harry had only just thrown himself back to me when Voldermort attacked us. I barely reacted in time.

'_Protego!'_

'_Corpanimus Colliblitto!'_

Our shield came up just in time, and the strange red and white curse rebounded off it, smashing out in all directions and clanging against what was left of the walls of the Great Hall.

'What the hell was that?' Harry yelled.

'Just because you know how to deflect my spells, doesn't mean you'll be safe forever, Potter!' Voldermort screamed. 'I've finally found the Obliteration Curse! You won't be joining your dear mummy and daddy when I'm through with you. This spell destroys you – both body _and_ soul!'

Harry pushed me further behind him. 'You are not to move from this spot, do you hear me?'

But I hadn't really comprehended much of what was being said. My eyes were on Remus, still and silent on the floor, a body amongst the battle. Moody jumped right over him, chasing a Death Eater with sharp flicks of his wand.

I was glad we were still sitting – I would have crumbled to the ground by now.

I searched for Tonks, wondering what she would do when she saw her fallen partner. Wondering if she was even still alive herself.

I couldn't see her. A lot of the Order were missing, actually, perhaps lost within the debris and rubble of the castle. Hermione and Ron were nowhere to be seen.

Hagrid bellowed suddenly, charging at a pair of cloaked attackers. He lifted the felled log that he'd been using as a pew, and threw it into the two. They flew backwards, landing heavily onto the ground.

I saw a body quite close to us – a flash of red hair told me it was a Weasley. I turned away. I didn't want to see any more.

'_Corpanimus Colliblitto!'_

Our shield was still up, but it shook dangerously against the brute strength of the ancient curse.

'Okay,' said Harry. I could see his knuckles whiten as he clutched the wand. 'Okay, here's what I'm going to do. I'll stand in front of you and take the hit from Voldermort. Then when he attacks again, you'll be protected by the ancient magic, and it will rebound and kill him.'

'That will never work,' I murmured.

'What? Why not?'

I lay my cheek against his back. 'Your mother didn't know about the ancient magic. She died for you simply because she loved you more than anything. If you're partly dying to defeat Voldermort, the spell won't protect me.' Harry stilled; he knew that I was right. I brushed my fingertips against the back of his neck, relishing the feel of his smooth hair. 'Harry, my love, the first prophecy is still valid. You and Voldermort must fight to the death. If you die today –'

'Voldermort lives,' Harry finished through his teeth. 'But that means that for the third prophecy to come true –'

'Harry, you cannot die today, do you understand?'

I felt him shaking. 'I can't lose you,' he said lowly.

'_Corpanimus Colliblitto!'_

The third spell broke our shield, and we slid across the floor like bowling pins, banging into the back of the Great Hall. I heard a clatter as the wand hit the ground, and scrambled forward as soon as I'd reached the wall. I knelt, my fingers curled around the wand. The spell came on instinct.

'_Protego!'_

I hadn't even realised Voldermort had sent another curse to us – I was relying solely on my Sight. He snarled, lowering his wand. 'A muggle performing magic. It's despicable.'

'We're going to beat you,' I said breathlessly, wiping a streak of blood from my mouth.

Someone screamed – a female. Was Hermione being hurt? Or Ginny? Or had Tonks found Remus's body?

Voldermort laughed. 'What makes you think you have any chance against me? You haven't had any kind of vision to tell you the outcome of this fight.' His lip curled. 'You're just a pathetic human who stole power from the people around her.'

'Copied, not stole,' I said. 'We share it.'

Voldermort's red eyes fell to a spot behind me. 'Well I suppose it's all yours now.'

A cold chill drifted across my skin, like ghostly fingers. I suddenly realised that many seconds had passed, yet Harry hadn't joined me. Why hadn't he gotten up from his spot?

Without even thinking of the consequences of what would happen if I took my attention off Voldermort, I turned.

Harry was on his side against the wall, unmoving. Blood ran in streaks down his face. He must have hit his head on the impact.

But he couldn't be dead. He definitely couldn't be dead, because –

'_Crucio!'_

xxx

Things were soft. Still. Silent.

Maybe I had fallen asleep in the bath. Those bubbles were just too relaxing. And the champagne had made my head a little funny – I had a bit of a headache.

I could hear an echo in my mind. A memory of a familiar song…

'_Inn't she beautiful?_

_The witch in white._

_I ne'er seen_

_A more lo'erly sight_

_Inn't he lucky?_

_The man she weds_

_He smiles at her_

_The vows are said_

_They whisk off toge'er_

_As bells do chime_

_They're bonded forever_

_Through space and time.'_

The song crackled, as though it was playing on an old record in my head. I even heard a scrape as the turntable needle reached the end of the grooves.

I stirred, trying to take in a deep breath, but my lungs were restricted. I was wearing something uncomfortable.

A dress. A white… dress.

A wedding dress.

'OH!' I cried, my eyes flinging open as the memories came flowing back.

The world returned into sharp focus. It was truly night now – everything was illuminated by the light of flickering fires around the Great Hall, caused by explosions or spells gone awry. The crackles sounded like gunfire in my sensitive ears. A putrid smell drifted by my nostrils, and I crinkled my nose in disgust.

A voice broke my thoughts.

'Emma…'

Harry was gazing down on me, his face covered in blood, his eyes red and tired. He cradled me against him, his lips pressing my temple. 'I'm so sorry.'

He was sitting against the wall on the altar, and I was lying in his arms. I didn't understand. What had happened? Where was Voldermort?

'What's going on?' I said, my voice blurred and barely coherent.

'He used the Torture Curse on you,' Harry murmured. 'When you dropped the wand, he called for the others…'

I turned my head to see, and immediately wished I hadn't.

Voldermort stood at the top of the steps, his wand pointed at us, and another wand in his hand. Harry's wand. _Our _wand.

The Death Eaters crowded their leader, making a semi-circle around Harry and I, and blocking my view of the rest of the hall. I inhaled in panic. Where was everyone else? My friends? My… my family?

Voldermort glanced from side to side, ensuring that his followers were watching. 'Witness my victory, here today,' he said. 'Remember and report to all those out there who doubted me. I will be the one who prevails; the one who completes the first and true prophecy!' He raised his wand, just slightly, to aim for both of us. _'Corpan–'_

CRACK.

I jerked back as something small appeared between me and Voldermort. Dobby.

Little house-elf Dobby.

There were a dozen more cracks, and a whole bunch of house-elves joined him. They stood as one, a wall protecting us.

I remembered, vaguely, that house-elves could Apparate within the castle. That they had powers – even without wands.

Voldermort sneered at them, seeming unimpressed by their presence. _'Avada K-'_

The house-elves lifted their hands simultaneously, blasting the entire group of Death Eaters back.

Including Voldermort.

'Holy crap,' I said, out of lack of things to say.

'Our wand,' Harry whispered. 'He's got our wand.'

But I didn't hear what he said – my attention was on the end of the hall. Now that the black cloaks were no longer barring my vision, I could see what they had done. The place was devastated – in complete ruins. Dumbledore was nowhere to be seen. There were a few of the Order left standing, but they were stuck behind a long strip of translucent air, which seemed to be acting as a barrier to stop them from advancing. Most of them weren't trying to get through, though. Most of them were tending to the wounded, or kneeling by loved ones. Still, lifeless loved ones.

I choked a sob. Those people; those wonderful, kind witches and wizards, who had helped me and befriended me and protected me from harm. Gone.

Tears rolled down my cheeks. I didn't understand. I didn't understand how this could have happened. I didn't understand how Voldermort had even gotten in in the first place. He'd never been able to breach the castle before…

Only… he had. He _had_ gotten in before – or at least, his dementors had.

A new moon. It had happened on a new moon. And… and… and today was a new moon. Dumbledore had requested it specifically. Not to mention that he was "late" for our wedding, so we'd ended up having to do the ceremony at dusk, like originally agreed.

My mind was reeling, even as the house-elves gathered closer together, preparing to protect us as the Death Eaters regained themselves.

Dumbledore? Dumbledore was behind this?

But no – I didn't believe that. I trusted Dumbledore. If he had brought this upon us today, he'd done it for a reason. I struggled to think if he'd given me some hint to what was going on in that mad mind of his.

_The end,_ he'd said.

But what did that mean?

From above me, Harry moaned softly. 'I don't know how to get out of this. We shouldn't have announced it to the students – we knew there were still spies around. It was probably bloody Millicent…'

It was with great effort that he got himself to his feet, helping me stand as well. I was having trouble moving in my dress.

His arms slid around me, holding me against his body. We were defenceless without our wand.

Harry was still mumbling beneath his breath. 'I don't know why I agreed to this. I shouldn't have listened to Hermione. Voldermort's a complete sadist – ruining my wedding was just too good for him to pass up.'

I froze. I could feel an answer, somewhere, in the corner of my mind. '_Hermione _talked you into this?'

Harry backtracked. 'Well, not _talked_ me into it,' he said hastily. 'She suggested it, and I was all for it. I would have thought of it myself, it's just… being married is something I figured I'd never get to do.'

'Hermione,' I said, my poor mind fighting to keep up with itself.

She had been studying the prophecies. She must have discovered the answer.

Hermione and Dumbledore. They had done this, together. They had both tried to persuade me to go through with the wedding – they had both mentioned that I was frightened of the wedding, not the marriage. They had both…

_Inn't she beautiful?_

_The witch in white._

The song was in my head, its lyrics swirling in my mind. Something… something about it…

_I ne'er seen_

_A more lo'erly sight_

Both Hermione and Dumbledore had hummed that song around me, while they were talking me into marrying Harry.

_Inn't he lucky?_

_The man she weds_

_He smiles at her_

_The vows are said_

Voldermort flung a spell towards the house-elves, but they deflected it as quickly and as easily as Harry had done.

I drowned out the sounds, concentrating. The prophecies all had to be fulfilled. How could this work? How could Harry defeat Voldermort on his own, with me still being the key? Why did I have to die?

_They whisk off toge'er_

_As bells do chime_

Voldermort threw another spell, as did half the Death Eaters, and a few of the elves lost their hold, blasting in all directions.

_They're bonded forever_

_Through space and time._

Space and time.

Bonded together, through space and time.

Dumbledore's words rung in my ears.

_The end._

'Oh,' I said with a sharp inhalation. 'Oh!'

Harry spun away from the chaos, hope shining on his face. 'Have you figured it out? Emma, please, please tell me you've figured it out!'

I lifted myself onto tiptoes, capturing his lips in a kiss. 'There.'

Harry stared at me in disbelief. 'There? _There?_ What the hell was that?'

I smiled gently. 'The end.'

Harry's breath caught in his chest. 'The end?'

'Of us as two,' I said hastily, rushing to explain. He thought I meant it was all over. That I had given him a final kiss.

'Get AWAY you filthy little rags!' Voldermort roared, kicking out at a house-elf and pointing his wand at me and Harry. _'Corpanimus Colliblitto!'_

I hadn't had a chance to tell Harry the answer. I hadn't told him that we needed to be together for the prophecy to work.

He didn't understand…

The red and white light shot towards us, fierce and unhindered. And, just like my vision, Harry spun and pushed me out of the way…

xxx

I hit the ground, scraping my palms and banging my knees. The stone beneath me was cold and hard. I lay, frozen in a combination of terror and disbelief, my body convulsing. I didn't know whether the kiss had been enough. I didn't know whether I'd had to be there, when the spell hit, for my plan to work. Harry had ruined it, _stupid_ Harry, stupid, noble Harry –

I choked a sob, not daring to turn, not daring to see whether my new husband had been wiped out, body and soul.

I heard gasps and exclamations behind me from the Death Eaters, as well as some of the house elves.

'Gone! Vanished!'

'What happened to him?'

Unable to handle the painful suspense any longer, I twisted my head to see.

Harry was there.

Voldermort was not.

Blood pulsed through me, feverish and filled with adrenaline. My eyes fell upon the two wands that Voldermort had been holding; now lying innocently on the ground where he'd been standing. I seized the opportunity while everyone was still in shock, and leapt to my feet, diving towards the them. The Death Eaters reacted too slowly – I grabbed Harry's wand and threw the shield charm up before me.

My perilous situation must have broken Harry from his dazed state, because he lunged to me and added his own magic to my spell.

The barrier holding the remaining members of the Order back fell, and help was on its way. The house-elves continued with their assault, throwing crowds of Death Eaters away with just a wave of their hand, a source of completely untapped power.

Harry drew his wand from my hand when he was sure we were safe, and began shooting hexes and jinxes to any dark-cloaked figure he could see. He caught sight of Malfoy heading back for the gaping hole in the Great Hall, and raised his wand.

'_Stupefy!'_

Malfoy catapulted forward as though his feet had landed on a springboard. He crashed into jagged rubble, spending debris flying everywhere.

Harry pursed his lips. 'That guy's not going _anywhere_.'

'Yeah, no kidding,' I muttered, as Harry spun back around to protect us from attacks.

I was happy to let him do the defending. I hadn't had nearly as much training as him with the wand, and besides, I'd already done plenty of magic for the day.

Nobody dared send a killing curse our way. I had a feeling that it was starting to dawn on the Death Eaters just what had happened to their leader.

It didn't take long for the Order to finish the war. Dumbledore, who had been lying on the ground earlier, was now up again, sporting a nasty scar running diagonally across his face, but just as powerful as ever. He had most of the Death Eaters bound together within minutes.

Even when it looked like all the enemies were secure, Harry kept his wand up, not letting his guard down for a moment.

'Care to tell me what the hell just happened?' he said, his eyes fixed on Malfoy, who was still unconscious.

'With the spell?' I said. 'No idea. But I know how the third prophecy tied into it all.'

'How?'

I trailed my fingers down his arm, relishing the feeling of the material of his tux. I couldn't believe we'd actually made it through. Every breath, every sensation was heightened as joy spread through me. 'Two became one,' I said. 'We bonded through space and time. It wasn't about one of us dying – it was about both of us joining.'

Harry scowled. 'Those damn prophecies are never clear enough. I wish we'd figured that out a little sooner.'

'Hermione did,' I said. 'And she must have told Dumbledore, too. That's why they nudged us into getting married.'

At mention of my Maid of Honour, I turned, searching through the crowds, my throat constricting in hope as I searched for her.

I clutched Harry's sleeve in relief when I saw a familiar pink dress across the hall. 'Oh – Hermione's there. And Ron's with her, too. They're all right.'

I felt Harry exhale beside me.

Hermione caught sight of us and waved furiously, half-sprinting over the broken room to reach us. 'Hello!' she squealed, barrelling into my arms, then reaching up to kiss Harry's cheek. 'I'm so glad the house-elves got to you in time!'

Harry stared at her. '_You_ sent them?' he said in disbelief.

She blushed. 'Well, I didn't want them getting hurt, or anything. I just knew that they were pretty powerful, and Dobby was keen to help, and –'

'It's okay, Hermione,' I said. 'I'm glad you sent them. They saved our lives.'

Hermione smiled. 'Thank goodness.' She nudged my arm. 'I knew you'd figure it out.'

I glared at her. 'Why the hell didn't you just tell me that getting married was the answer?'

She shrugged. 'Professor Dumbledore and I agreed that it would be better if we didn't.'

'What for?' Harry demanded.

'Because, Harry, some things aren't just about the war.' She glanced at me. 'We wanted both of you to be marrying each other for love, and love alone. Once you're bound in the wizarding world, that's it. There's no turning back. We didn't want either of you agreeing to this wedding purely so you could beat Voldermort – otherwise you'd be wondering later on in life if that's the only reason you did it. Now there's no doubt in your minds that you did this only because you loved each other.' She narrowed her eyes at me. 'Although we almost had to give it away when Miss Noble over here called off the wedding.'

I cringed. 'Sorry.'

Ron stepped up onto the altar, glancing over his shoulder at the broken scene behind him. 'It's looking pretty bad out there,' he said.

The nurse had bustled in, floating a whole trolley full of potions and supplies behind her.

Hermione's smile slowly faded from her face as she surveyed the battlefield. 'How… how many…?'

I thought of Remus, and my heart twisted in my chest. I didn't even answer the question; I just jumped from the altar and headed over to where he had fallen.

Tonks was kneeling there already, her face white and her eyes wide. 'Emma!' she said when I approached. 'Emma, please get Madam Pomfrey – I can't leave him here, I can't leave him alone…'

Remus was on the ground, his chest slashed open, and his complexion a strange blue colour. It didn't look like he was breathing.

A little cry escaped my lips.

Tonks lurched forward, clutching my hand. _'Please_, Emma!'

I nodded mutely, then turned to find the nurse. Members of the Order crowded around her already, begging her to look at their loved ones. I stepped over Remus to join them, though I knew I was wasting my time. Tonks was delusional, if she thought she could help him.

But I knew that, if I had been in her situation and it had been Harry lying there, I'd be desperate to do everything I could.

At that thought, I checked over to the altar to make sure my new husband was still okay. Sirius had joined the trio, and was hugging Harry.

My elation at making it through the battle alive was swiftly ebbing away, replaced by pain and nausea as Madam Pomfrey declared deaths, or prepared injured friends for transferral to the wizard hospital.

Moody and Minerva hadn't made it. They lay unmoving between rubble. They didn't look like fallen warriors. There were no wounds, or blood. In fact, in a sick sort of way, they looked like they were just sleeping.

I touched Minerva's face, remembering how only hours ago, she had been doing my hair. Never again would she wave her wand, or fix a curl, or talk to me.

I had to leave her – I couldn't bear to see that colourless face any longer.

Ginny had been hit by two Torture Curses at once, and was mumbling incoherently while her father clung to her hand in panic. Fred and Charlie were both badly injured, and Madam Pomfrey had to spend a bit of time on them before they were ready to be taken to the hospital.

Kingsley had lost a hand. It had been severed right off by a dark curse, and could not be fixed.

Hagrid seemed okay – his giant blood must have made him pretty resilient. He was busy keeping an eye on the bound Death Eaters with Dumbledore.

Severus was walking around with a limp, but he was still helping the injured, rather than waiting for Madam Pomfrey.

Finally, the nurse reached Remus. She took one look at him and pursed her lips, the same way she had done with Moody and Minerva. She placed a hand on Tonks's shoulder.

'I'm sorry, my dear.'

My heart plummeted.

Tonks shook her head. 'No,' she whispered. 'No, no please…'

'I could repair the wound,' Madam Pomfrey said. 'But it was a complex curse that hit him. See how his skin has a bluish tinge? His werewolf side has been affected. He'll react badly to any remedy I give him – it'll probably end up killing him, rather than saving him.'

'There's got to be a way,' Tonks said. 'There must be something –'

Madam Pomfrey looked grim. 'Well, if you can provide me with the blood of the werewolf that bit him, I might be able to do something.'

Tonks stood. 'Fenrir Greyback.'

Madam Pomfrey stared at her. 'You'll never be able to do it.'

Tonks set her jaw. She may have had a different appearance as Pip, but I recognised her expression. She was determined, and nothing was going to stand in her way.

Madam Promfrey clearly didn't appreciate Tonks's resolved face, because she continued to argue. 'He's a psychopath. A murderer. You'd never even be able to find him.'

Tonks pointed to Remus. 'Fix my man as best you can, and I'll do the rest. Got it?'

I couldn't stand around and listen any longer. From the sounds of it, Tonks had set herself a suicide mission. I slipped away, unnoticed by the pair. On my way back to Harry, I bumped into Dumbledore.

He touched my shoulder. 'I am so very proud of you, Emma.'

I pursed my lips, struggling to contain my tears. 'I should have figured it out sooner. If I had, some people might… might not have been hurt.'

'I don't think you could have done anything differently,' Dumbledore said gently. He peered down at me through his glasses. 'I hope you have come to appreciate how precious your gift is; to share magic with a loved one.'

I nodded, but that was hardly my main issue at the moment. I went to step around him, but I stopped at the last moment.

'Do you know why the spell backfired?'

'My goodness, Emma, how old do you actually think I am?' Dumbledore said, his eyes twinkling. 'If the magic was dug up from an ancient civilization, then I'm safely clueless as to its rules and boundaries.'

'But do you have any kind of theory?' I said.

Dumbledore tilted his head, thinking quietly for a moment. 'It seems,' he said slowly, 'that the stronger and more horrible the curse, the more easily love defies it. Both of you have sacrificed much for one another, and I'm sure you've each taken a blow for your loved one at some point. Considering it took just a marriage to make the curse rebound, I can see why it was buried.'

'But how did Voldermort not realise?' I said.

'I would think it is safe to assume he learnt very little over the years about love, even after his first downfall with Harry. He would have practiced the spell, naturally, but probably on his own followers, who had nowhere near the same protection of love that you two have, and certainly not married. He was so power-hungry, so driven by the desire to destroy Harry completely, he didn't think of the ramifications. It was beyond him that he may not have complete control over the power. This, of course, is all just theory.'

I nodded, but most of his words were jumbled in my head. I could barely grasp any simple concept, let alone one as complicated as the technicalities of magic. My mind and heart were on my adopted-father.

Harry joined us. 'Hey,' he said, drawing me close and kissing my temple. 'Are you okay?'

I shook my head. 'Remus is hurt. Tonks is going after some werewolf called Fenrir Greyback.'

'What?' Harry said, and his voice betrayed his utter horror. 'Why would she do something so insane?'

'It's the only way to save Remus,' I mumbled. 'And, to be honest, part of me is tempted to do something to help. Remus got hit saving our lives.'

'Well, why don't we?' Harry said.

I stared up at him. 'Why don't we what?'

'Help.' He raised his eyebrows at my stunned expression. 'Well, why not? It's not like I had any plans past today. I've been training my whole life for battle – I might as well do something useful with what I've learnt.' His arms tightened around me. 'And I could always use someone to watch my back.'

'I'll do what I can,' Dumbledore said. 'I have some contacts that might be able to assist you.' His eyes flickered over to Ron, Hermione, and Sirius, who were joining the other Weasleys. 'And I'm sure you'll have plenty of other people who would be willing to join you.'

'Great,' Harry said.

My heart was fluttering, my palms were sweating, and my head was spinning. It was all happening so fast. We had just come out of one battle alive, and suddenly we were diving into another one.

But I glanced over to Remus, who was being tended to by Madam Pomfrey, and I knew what my choice would be.

I realised, suddenly, that Tonks had gone. Panicked, I searched for her among the crowd. I caught sight of her bubblegum pink hair heading towards the door of the Great Hall. She was already on her way to find Greyback.

'Oh, hell!' I cried, pulling away from Harry's arms and lifting my wedding dress from the ground as I rushed after her. 'Tonks, wait up! We're coming with you!'

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Well, that's it guys! It's over, and I have to say, I had much-o fun with this one. I hope you enjoyed reading - though if you made it this far, I think it's safe to assume you liked it ;p

Huge thanks to Railway Station and Sailor Em, who kept me going and cheered me on and made me laugh with their awesome reviews. Love you, guys!

Until next time,

Kaitlyn Fall


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